AIBU - house purchase with partner

[Whatshouldidoinlife]

Hi all
Just wanted thoughts.

Partner and I want to purchase a house together.
purchase price £700,000.

I own a house and my partner rents.
My partner would pay stamp duty in region of £25-£30k.

I would put down my equity in house as deposit and ring fence that percentage of property of price and the remaining percentage would be split 50/50.

I would pay an early exit mortgage fee and the estate agent fees (around £6k).

My partner earns 3 x as I do.

If we put in our salary percentage wise -70/30 to my partner and shared the rest of the equity (bar my deposit) 50/50 does that sound like a fair deal?

Have I missed something or do I need to consider anything else?
I want to be fair to myself and him.

I want to buy a house together as I feel that's the next step in our relationship but due to a bitter divorce previously I am financially scared.

my partner has recently got a high paid job after retaining from a low paid sector.

This sounds like an interesting idea. Does this mean I only pay 50% of bills?

I would shy away from owning it in a joint tenancy particularly as you have children that aren’t his - this means that when you die it automatically becomes his and that isn’t I don’t think what you want. Particularly as that may well not ring fence your deposit. You don’t want a joint tenancy and you aren’t married so you don’t need one

get legal advice separately setting out what you want - the money you are putting in to remain yours and the mortgage side to be split 70/30

Op I would advise getting legal advice about this from a solicitor on your own, not the one you intend to instruct for the conveyancing. But you need to look after yourself and future proof any arrangement for you, not your partner. In other words stop thinking about them, they can do that, think about you.

Mortgage company would still require you to be on the mortgage and you would be liable for the payments.

Please spend a few hundred quid and get some time with a solicitor with you and your partner, and then just by yourself to understand the ins and outs of all of this.

As far as I see it you are putting a huge amount of risk on you and your kids and I can't see any risk, but only benefit for your partner.

But actually what the OP is proposing is that her deposit is ring fenced her partner pays 70% of the mortgage but any equity after the deposit is taken off is split 50/50

it isn’t the OP who is losing out with that

This depends on whose the additional 2 children are. Yours or his.

Personally, I wouldn't buy without being married. Why make such a financial commitment, which will be very messy to undo if you're not committed to a long-term future together? And if you are committed to a long-term future, then why aren't you getting married? Makes no sense and I feel you're setting yourselves up for a messy split in future.

If the property decreases in value then OP loses out

If he drags his heels on a sale for best price OP loses out

If they decide to split and want a quick sale OP loses out

If he becomes unpleasant and OP feels she must be the one to move out her 300k is unusable until the sale completes.

He is benefiting from not only a mortgage as leverage, but also her deposit to generate capital growth, but not taking any risk

The OP has the most to lose from marriage though - she has an asset, he doesn't.

If you have a child together and are currently living in a house you own what has the financial set up been to date? Has DP been paying anything other than just a % of bills and if so how much. How was maternity leave covered financially if you weren't on full pay the whole time? Do you solely pay for your DC/is there any maintenance from their DF? Who does the child care/household tasks/mental load? All those things really should have a baring on how you proceed as it's the best indication of intent/proper family unit.

Then she can’t buy with him

they should have a declaration of trust and decide to be tenants in common

and NOT get married

I think any early redemption fees for the current mortgage plus stamp duty and all other moving costs should be classed as costs and split in whatever way you end up owning the property. Your proportion of costs can come out of equity and he can pay cash for his.

Again, if you're financially scared then making a £700k purchase is absolute madness.

I think I'm just getting distracted by giving my children a better house with their own rooms but not realising actually what I risk losing.

Just because your salary is lower, don’t underestimate the broader value of £240k deposit, which you’re right to ring-fence. That’s huge and will mean lower interest rates too etc.

Regarding securing %’s which I agree with, ultimately it is also his child living there and presumably he wants a certain standard in that situation so if he proportionally paid more on the mortgage and it was clearly outlined, don’t see the issue. He has benefitted from your deposit. There has to be some compromise else you’ll need a degree in economics to calculate it.

Are all 3 children yours?

Just saw this is a recent promotion. Is it a secure job (as any are these days)? Don’t overstretch yourselves.

Can you not port your existing mortgage onto a new property and add your partner in as a transfer of equity? That only cost me about £300 (although admittedly that was years ago! Suspect less than ERC though).

That's my only comment as others have addressed the other bits.

Yes

Are they all his?

He's divorced i presume?

If DP currently rents, does that mean you have never lived together? It is a worry to take on a 700k property with someone you have never lived with.

OP if you have 3 children to house, only one of which is dps, why are you trying to arrange bills etc proportionate to wage so you pay less? Why should he subsidise the large house needed to house the additional children you have? He has a responsibility to his child. Not yours.

One is his. Two are not.