Friends not sponsoring dh

[Primmyhill]

Ok, I know times are hard and there are loads of people asking for sponsorship etc but I’m just a bit hacked off. In the past I’ve sponsored friends kids for things like walking around the playground at lunch time, sponsored silence etc, you get my drift but there’s been loads over the last few years and I always give £10-20. My husband is doing a huge challenge in April and the sponsorship has been live for months and I’ve sent the link out twice and not one of them has sponsored him. None of them are badly off - they just can’t be bothered I reckon and I’m pretty annoyed. AIBU? Would you do? I’ll know better next time when darling Henry wants money for pushing his teddy around the local f’ing playing field.

I can only speak from my own experience.

Sorry if you think I haven't been conscientious enough.

Nope. Broadsheets (including the guardian), journals and websites centered around the third sector/charity sector , as well as board room discussions and charity focussed training events.

Can you explain why you are seemingly implying it's right-wing to be concerned with the (largely middle-class) phenomenon of exotic experiences being dressed up as "charity fund-raising"?

I'm obviously much more lowly than you, I'm not in the boardroom, I spend my time working directly with fundraisers and supporters.

I do both

But surely any decent fundraiser is well trained on the rules around charity fundraising. I mean they are pretty cut and dry.

Maybe if you spent a little more time educating yourself on the industry you've chosen to work in, you might progress.

I know what the rules are. I'm telling you that no one has ever expressed any concern to me about the concept of charity v self funded places.

Thanks for your concern, but I'm very happy in my work.

@CountryShepherd It is a common concern.
The people parachuting jumping for charity get a nice parachute jump paid for by their friends and families. And that is how it is marketed to young people especially - ever fancied doing a parachute jump?

Why do you think those rules were formulated? They were created precisely because a lot of people had concerns. Because a lot of people don't like to find they contributed to Larry Lycra's hotel cost rather than actually to XYZ charity's activities

That was clumsy of me. I meant it as a shorthand for the sort of people who have very loud clear cut opinions whilst knowing very little about the actual subject on which they're opining.

And for the record, I have worked with people who wouldn't be considered middle class who have done amazing challenges and raised huge amounts of sponsorship.

With times being what they are, it seems insensitive to ask people for money for what is likely something minor and local. Really, aren't there better targets in the world for donations?

This is feeling rather spiteful and personal now so I'm going to head out.

You are right to be pissed off OP. You cannot make them sponsor your husband but you can make a note and not sponsor their kids in the future.

The only spiteful comments were yours implying only daily mail reader types would be concerned about where their charity donations are spent

Your view of what's minor is likely not to be minor to someone else, particularly if that piffling trifle could get them a new wheelchair, or specialist treatment, or a new scout hut ... Everything's relative, isn't it.

Nonsense, she's been getting it in the neck from several people who are being terribly snotty about how badly she does her job.

Oh and your slightly weird and barbed comment when I mentioned boardroom debate.

Not all charities are vast mega charities. A lot of my time in charity board rooms is my own free time given to small local charities

I didn't say that. I said I couldn't be bothered to get into a row with you about it, which is what you're clearly absolutely gagging for. 😇

NEVER round up for a retail charity cause. It's just a tax dodge on their part. Just donate yourself to charities that mean something to you.

I wouldn't sponsor an adult.

Hate sponsored things! Can tolerate it if it's kids.

I often sponsor adults friends or work colleagues if its a charity I don't already give too. I give to our local MND organisation already so wouldn't sponsor someone for that.

The only charity I have advocated is sadly close to my heart- an organisation that supports bereaved parents like dh and me when our twin babies died after birth last year. They supported us and arranged things I didn't have the strength to do whilst in hospital. I didn't ask people for money though. I asked for their time and promoted their volunteer work.

I get this OP. I have spent hundreds over the years sponsoring people for their runs, climbs etc. If I do one or my DC do one I'm expecting those chips to come in and for those people to reciprocate. I will note the ones that do and don't and respond in kind.

Yes charity shouldn't be like that but if someone won't support me when I supported them I wouldn't support their thing in the future unless there was a good reason.