Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Invited to party and no one there!

201 replies

harlacem0507 · 01/03/2025 17:07

As the title starts basically! My 19 month old got invited to a 1st birthday party by a mum I know from baby group (not close but make small talk every week) at our local village hall. Party started at 3pm, we rocked up at 3.20 as our daughter overslept from her nap and no one was there! Bouncy castle was inflated, along with chairs and tables and balloons organized but no one about! We saw the lady that runs the village hall she said they popped back for something and gave her a call, said u have guests, mum replied we are coming back anyway, so we waited another 20 minutes outside the actual doors (but inside the main hall) then the brother of the mum arrived and let us in, a few more people with kids arrived and it got to 4.10 and we decided to leave, there was no juice to get the kids, no food etc as they obviously hadn't come back, I felt a bit bad leaving but aibu to think wtf was all that about? I mean I like to think I'm chilled but this was on another level? My partner was astounded by it! Oh and we didn't leave the present either as it seemed a bit odd leaving it and not being there so my daughter is currently playing with it!

OP posts:
FuckoffeeBeforeCoffee · 01/03/2025 17:09

That's weird AF.

MySpaceQueen · 01/03/2025 17:10

Bizarre. Did the brother give any clues ?

Overthebow · 01/03/2025 17:11

How strange. We would have left as soon as we got there if no one was there, we wouldn’t have waited.

Darker · 01/03/2025 17:13

Sounds to me that there was something happening at home. I’d approach this with sensitivity and not bother them if you don’t really know the family.

Liliol · 01/03/2025 17:15

Bit mean to keep the present. This child's birthday has likely been ruined (the party abandoned at least, due to whatever must have been going on).

WonderingWanda · 01/03/2025 17:15

I would assume something bad had happened. No one would go to all that effort and then just not turn up. I would've left the pressie though. Maybe drop them a message and ask if everything is alright?

Schoolchoicesucks · 01/03/2025 17:17

Maybe the 1 year old or their parents were upset that no-one turned up and so went home?

Lostworlds · 01/03/2025 17:18

Sounds like there was something else going on. If it was me, I’d check in with the mum later today or tomorrow to say you stopped by.

ChompandaGrazia · 01/03/2025 17:18

A 1st birthday is usually more for the parents that the child. A 1 year old doesn’t know what’s going on.
I’d assume that something has happened that meant they had to abandon it.

Britishsummertime22 · 01/03/2025 17:18

Something had obviously happened. Hopefully nothing bad. You were mean to keep the present. I would just send a message making sure the family are okay.

harlacem0507 · 01/03/2025 17:19

I'm not sure, it did seem a bit mean I know but I think I was just annoyed at the time we wasted. Didn't seem to be an issue I'm aware of, the brother started sorting out the music etc and when that last called she said they was on their way back, it all seemed really flaky to be honest! I won't say anything but if she asks next week about it I'll say well we did turn up but you and the birthday girl weren't there!

OP posts:
Whaleandsnail6 · 01/03/2025 17:21

Sounds like there has been some sort of big emergency for the family.

Bit mean not leaving the present since you had already bought it, poor kid has already not had the planned party (not that they would be aware) but this is not their fault so you could have left the gift.

Britishsummertime22 · 01/03/2025 17:21

But you don't know if there was an issue, you've said that you don't even know this mum more than to say hi to. I just think have a bit of patience and a bit of compassion. It was half an hour of your life. Hardly a big deal!! To take a present off a one year old is proper stingy!

HalfTermHoliday · 01/03/2025 17:21

How strange. I think I'd approach this one with kindness and assume the best of the family before you actually know what happened.

Also, depending on the outcome of your next conversation with her, I might be tempted to replace the gift with a little token gift.

Jennaveeve · 01/03/2025 17:22

Wow. Keeping the present is just a new level of tight. Clearly something had happened.

Ella31 · 01/03/2025 17:22

harlacem0507 · 01/03/2025 17:19

I'm not sure, it did seem a bit mean I know but I think I was just annoyed at the time we wasted. Didn't seem to be an issue I'm aware of, the brother started sorting out the music etc and when that last called she said they was on their way back, it all seemed really flaky to be honest! I won't say anything but if she asks next week about it I'll say well we did turn up but you and the birthday girl weren't there!

Very strange but you said it yourself that you were 20 mins late because your child overslept so maybe something happened on their end too. I would have left the present though. I doubt they'd go to the bother of paying for a bounce castle and hall if not bothered.

MySpaceQueen · 01/03/2025 17:23

Schoolchoicesucks · 01/03/2025 17:17

Maybe the 1 year old or their parents were upset that no-one turned up and so went home?

This was my feeling

jellyfishperiwinkle · 01/03/2025 17:24

I would just text letting them know you did come and say you hope everything is ok.

MrsJHernandez · 01/03/2025 17:25

MySpaceQueen · 01/03/2025 17:23

This was my feeling

And mine.

harlacem0507 · 01/03/2025 17:25

Britishsummertime22 · 01/03/2025 17:21

But you don't know if there was an issue, you've said that you don't even know this mum more than to say hi to. I just think have a bit of patience and a bit of compassion. It was half an hour of your life. Hardly a big deal!! To take a present off a one year old is proper stingy!

It wasn't half an hour it was nearly an hour. I didn't take the present back I just never bothered giving it!

OP posts:
LonelyMamaBlahhh · 01/03/2025 17:26

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

fivegreenmonkeys · 01/03/2025 17:27

Liliol · 01/03/2025 17:15

Bit mean to keep the present. This child's birthday has likely been ruined (the party abandoned at least, due to whatever must have been going on).

You did see the child turned 1?

Iamallowedtodisagreewithyou · 01/03/2025 17:33

Did you really take the present back with you?

CaptainMyCaptain · 01/03/2025 17:33

Darker · 01/03/2025 17:13

Sounds to me that there was something happening at home. I’d approach this with sensitivity and not bother them if you don’t really know the family.

This. I doubt they did it on purpose. Something must have happened.

LittleHangleton · 01/03/2025 17:35

Is this first baby or are their older siblings?

I think they were mortified no one turned up, so went home.