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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

People who are too busy to do exercise

616 replies

Hollyandivygoout · 27/02/2025 09:43

I run about 4 miles, 4 times a week. I’m in a routine and force myself to do it even when I can’t be arsed. It takes me about 30-40 minutes each time I go for a run and I squeeze it in early morning, before dinner, just whenever I can really. I work full time and have 2DC who are admittedly at secondary school now, but this is something I’ve always done.
My AIBU is finding it annoying when people tell me they don’t have time to do any exercise. It’s like they’re so busy and important and I’ve got all the time in the world. I honestly don’t believe that the vast majority of people can’t squeeze in half an hour a few times a week.

OP posts:
MindlessDaydream · 27/02/2025 11:20

Be careful OP - you could be a non exerciser at some point too.

BitOutOfPractice · 27/02/2025 11:21

tropicalroses · 27/02/2025 10:35

4 miles really isn't that far and the recommendation for physical activity is 150 minutes per week. Are you sure you can't find the time for another run or go a little further on the couple you do manage?

Show quote history

Nice attempt to out-smug the op there 🙄 But the recommendation is for 75 minutes of vigorous exercise or 150 minutes of moderate exercise (or a mixture of the two). So op is doing fine.

RisingSunn · 27/02/2025 11:22

Why on earth do you care about other people’s exercise habits?

Pigsinblankets13 · 27/02/2025 11:22

Ever thought that people have different priorities and different ideas of self care?

You're prioritising a run as self care, someone else might prefer to use that time to watch TV, or have a bath or do whatever the feck they like...

muggart · 27/02/2025 11:23

OP, you only have 1 job and your children are in secondary school. No mention of other caring responsibilities. Surely you can see that you do not have a busy lifestyle compared with many people?!

I used to work out 4 times a week. Now I don't at all. I am a SAHM to a 4 month old and a toddler who isn't in nursery. I sleep when they sleep (in the same bed as them because they both need me in the night).

Someday I will exercise again but right now it's not a priority. I have to find time to eat, cook, shower, do groceries, spend time with DH, tidy, arrange appointments and do other admin. All while caring for small needy people 24/7. Exercise ends up being pushed down the list. That's not making excuses, that's just how it is.

MandyFriend · 27/02/2025 11:25

I'm pretty sure this is rage bait! Anyone arrogant enough to think everyone can trot off for a four-mile run whenever they feel like it, isn't going to be boasting about it on Mumsnet, are they...?

VikingLady · 27/02/2025 11:26

Congratulations on being better than the people around you.

Or just.... having more spoons.

34NotDeadYet · 27/02/2025 11:27

“… have 2DC who are admittedly at secondary school now…

I mean the answer is right there in your post OP….. You can squeeze in exercise to your busy lifestyle because your children are old enough to leave. Those still in the trenches of small children and no second adult present don’t have that luxury, irrespective of other factors. It’s not rocked science really…

Trendyname · 27/02/2025 11:27

I thought op had a useful advice for those who don't find time for exercise but this thread was about berating them 🙄

Huckyfell · 27/02/2025 11:27

SoftPillow · 27/02/2025 10:55

Gold medal for you OP. Although, only 4 miles and only 4 times a week. That’s a bit lame isn’t it? Surely you should squeeze in a few extra miles….

Not everyone has the time:

I’m up at 6.15am, we leave the house at 7am. I get home at 6.30pm and then get the kids sorted and do a bit more work. I eat at 8pm. Get the school stuff sorted and the in bed at 10pm after a bit more work.

In my lunch break, when I get it, I like to actually eat lunch.

We live in the countryside, no pavement or streetlights, I can’t run in the dark through muddy fields.

So do fuck off quite frankly.

That's a bit unnecessary, telling someone to fuck off because you didn't like what she said. Always be nice

MyNameIsErinQuin · 27/02/2025 11:28

This

ClaredeBear · 27/02/2025 11:28

I had thoughts around this recently too. I understand people, for a variety of reasons don't prioritise their own health and fitness and can then take the view that you must have the luxury of more time and / or money than they do but I guess they take that approach to make themselves feel a bit better. I've experienced it myself and in hindsight I'd say most comments come from insecurity and most people do know deep down that exercise is a good thing.

swingandtrampoline · 27/02/2025 11:28

I have two young children (youngest one is an infant) and I would love to exercise but their needs and house chores and life admin are prioritised to exercise. Your circumstances are different to many people. For me personally to be able to do exercise I must be: 1) have no children to care for (they must be in a childcare setting) 2) All life admin and house chores must be complete

Engleberthumper · 27/02/2025 11:28

Hollyandivygoout · 27/02/2025 09:43

I run about 4 miles, 4 times a week. I’m in a routine and force myself to do it even when I can’t be arsed. It takes me about 30-40 minutes each time I go for a run and I squeeze it in early morning, before dinner, just whenever I can really. I work full time and have 2DC who are admittedly at secondary school now, but this is something I’ve always done.
My AIBU is finding it annoying when people tell me they don’t have time to do any exercise. It’s like they’re so busy and important and I’ve got all the time in the world. I honestly don’t believe that the vast majority of people can’t squeeze in half an hour a few times a week.

It takes you 40mins to run 4 miles? Do you have very short legs?

cosietea · 27/02/2025 11:29

You appear to have very low self esteem and have assigned your worth to the amount of running you can do in a 7 day period.

Your personality is more than the miles you rack up and it would benefit you to reflect inwards instead of projecting on those you deem not as great as you

MrsSunshine2b · 27/02/2025 11:31

Well that's amazing for you and you're clearly very proud of yourself.

There are a lot more barriers to exercise than you seem to think.

I might have 30-40 minutes spare, but by the time my work day is finished, my children are cared for and I have done my other hobbies which benefit my mental and physical health, it is very difficult for someone with chronic fatigue to use that 30 minutes to do exercise.

I absolutely do not have time to spend days recovering if I accidentally push myself too far and end up triggering my medical problems, which also cause the chronic fatigue.

I can't run due to joint problems. I don't like to swim because the chlorine really irritates my eyes and my asthma. Gym classes are tricky because I have to be free at the right time to go which is not often. I'm generally limited to things I can do at home in my own time, and can only do that when my small child isn't going to come in and try to "help".

Add in ADHD and the difficulties around executive function, the stress of trying to decide what exercise to do, work out what to wear, make sure it's been laundered and put away where it should have been, then factor in showering and getting dressed again when I get home- that's a lot of steps to work through.

I'm happy for you that you are able bodied and can use that 30-40 minutes, but if you ask me to join you and I say "I don't have time," I mean all of the above, but am assuming that you would rather use YOUR time for something more valuable than hearing it all.

BitOutOfPractice · 27/02/2025 11:33

cosietea · 27/02/2025 11:29

You appear to have very low self esteem and have assigned your worth to the amount of running you can do in a 7 day period.

Your personality is more than the miles you rack up and it would benefit you to reflect inwards instead of projecting on those you deem not as great as you

I mean I agree the op is being ridiculous but that’s some stretch you’ve made there!

Vroomfondleswaistcoat · 27/02/2025 11:33

I sort of agree with you, OP, but lifestyles and life stages are very different for people. I run 5 miles 5 times a week, do 30 minutes exercise bike 5 times a week and 3 x 30 minute Pilates. That's a LOT. But I work an evening shift at work so I don't need to be in until 4pm, plus I have no kids at home and a dog that needs a lot of exercise. So I run because the dog needs to run, I do the bike because some days when dog isn't up for fast running I need to get my heart rate really working. But I have the time.

If you work a 9-5, then it would mean getting up early, running in the dark, and then exercise again after work. And that is not going to happen. So I think those of us who do have time to exercise have to thank our lucky stars for supportive environments and the ability to do all we want to.

fiorentina · 27/02/2025 11:34

I don’t believe that most people don’t have time, but equally other people’s exercise regime isn’t my problem unless they are criticising my life choices!

SpotlessLeopard · 27/02/2025 11:34

Well OP what do you expect the response from this brag post to be?
Well done good for you, I expect your house is also immaculate and you cook delicious homemade food every single night, and your family never have takeaways? Anything I missed?

Everyone has a different situation and we all struggle with different things. Like you struggle with not being judgey.

Arrivals4lucky · 27/02/2025 11:35

Nottsandcrosses · 27/02/2025 11:17

Well she sits in the corner on the couch away from everything with her ipad and lunch box, she knows she absolutely can not walk around and is always only about a max of 8 feet away from me at any one time.

My sessions are strength based training, so alot of weights.

Show quote history

No idea what gym you go to where a kid can sit in a sofa a few feet away and watch you and everyone’s happy with that but good for you.
She’s hardly learning good habits though, is she. Sat on a screen for convenience. And people wonder why children have no attentions spans any more… here darling, here’s your digital babysitter.Play an ‘educational’ game…

Nothatgingerpirate · 27/02/2025 11:36

And the problem is?
If they choose to say they don't have time, just accept it and be satisfied with your self discipline.
I absolutely hate any form of forced exercise, so have a discipline around food. Basically I'd rather not eat, than exercise.
Never been overweight, 46 yo.
Btw, forced movement isn't for anyone.
I don't understand why they just don't say they cannot be arsed, like myself, it's their life.

spoodlesee · 27/02/2025 11:36

don't prioritise their own health and fitness and can then take the view that you must have the luxury of more time and / or money than they do but I guess they take that approach to make themselves feel a bit better.

But some people may prioritise their mental health by spending time on a hobby, or seeing a friend etc.

Pickingmyselfup · 27/02/2025 11:36

I run 4 times a week, weight lift 3 times a week, do yoga twice a week and pilates once a week plus walk the kids a mile to school and back and I still get why people don't have the time and energy.

I can only do what I do because I have a husband who can sort the kids and I only work a 4 day week.

If I worked full time, had to drive to get the kids to school and me to work, I didn't have a husband to share things with, I would probably be too knackered to even consider it. I might technically have the time whilst I was sitting on the sofa but people need downtime.

cosietea · 27/02/2025 11:37

@BitOutOfPractice

Not really. There is no reason whatsoever that someone should be annoyed with another human for not following their way of life.

The OP absolutely should try and understand the deep rooted reasons why she feels so aggrieved about something is none of her business and has zero impact on her life.

And here you have a long list of replies from people justifying why they don't do exercise! Nobody needs to justify to the OP or anyone else