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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

People who are too busy to do exercise

616 replies

Hollyandivygoout · 27/02/2025 09:43

I run about 4 miles, 4 times a week. I’m in a routine and force myself to do it even when I can’t be arsed. It takes me about 30-40 minutes each time I go for a run and I squeeze it in early morning, before dinner, just whenever I can really. I work full time and have 2DC who are admittedly at secondary school now, but this is something I’ve always done.
My AIBU is finding it annoying when people tell me they don’t have time to do any exercise. It’s like they’re so busy and important and I’ve got all the time in the world. I honestly don’t believe that the vast majority of people can’t squeeze in half an hour a few times a week.

OP posts:
Ilovemyshed · 27/02/2025 21:25

I work full time
I care for elderly parents
Do volunteering stuff
Run the house
I'm knackered.
My knee hurts.
Choice between a run and an early night?
Get lost with your patronising OP

Trendyname · 27/02/2025 21:35

Thornybush · 27/02/2025 20:22

That's very harsh. Exercise is very important for body and mind, there's no need to ridicule the op for prioritising her health.

Show quote history

But it's ok for OP can ridicule / judge others?

Bellyblueboy · 27/02/2025 21:37

Is it just people not making time to exercise that annoys you? Or people who don’t make time to read? Or people who don’t make time to keep up with current affairs? Or people who don’t have time to spend as much time with their friends as they would like.

or is this faux horror because you feel
superior?

Newmumatlast · 27/02/2025 21:39

Comedycook · 27/02/2025 09:46

I don't think it's because they literally don't have any time free at all...I think it is because they are too exhausted to use that time

This and also because I have little children, a very demanding job and often my only available time is when they're in bed but I don't feel I can run and feel safe at that time. I tried the gym but couldn't get there enough - took too much time there and back plus work out which then reduced available time in evening to work and sleep a sufficient amount. I prioritise being able to do as much childcare for my kids as possible and still work enough to bring in a good amount as breadwinner. I do try to fit a run here and there around work but I'm already trying to do a full day of work in reduced working hours around school. When I work away I try to book places with a gym or pool on purpose to make best use of being kid free. I'm sure it will be easier when they're a bit older.

Huskytrot · 27/02/2025 21:51

Panda368 · 27/02/2025 09:55

As someone who runs 3-4 times a week, does weight training + pilates plus having a FT job and 2 kids under 7 AND 2 hours commuting 3x a week. You are being a judgy nob. Different people have different priorities. Some people don't like exercise some do. Its really not that hard to figure out.

As somone who has older kids at secondary OP I'm sure you're more than able to squeeze in a few extra sessions. Personally I think you're being lazy. (not very nice when someone is judgy is it?)

I'd love to see your weekly schedule

Waffle19 · 27/02/2025 21:58

I get up at 6ish after a terrible night sleep with my youngest, get both kids fed and ready, myself ready, out the house for before work. Full day at work. Home by 5.30/6. A precious hour to spend with the kids until bedtime. 7.30 kids asleep, time to make dinner. 8.15pm cooking and dinner done, time to either do housework or relax for an hour before an early bed given I’ll be up all night with youngest.

At which point would you fit in exercise??

Dont get me wrong I love exercise and know it’s important but it’s just not feasible to do four times a week at the moment. You might be fitter than most of us on this thread but you don’t sound like a nice person.

Loloj · 27/02/2025 22:04

What else do you like to judge other people on OP?

Why are you bothered about other peoples exercise habits? Maybe they don’t have time/energy or maybe they just can’t be arsed and find exercise a chore. Maybe they have children to look after 24/7 and can’t leave them to go out running.

natalieplusone · 27/02/2025 22:11

It's what your priorities are.
If exercise is a priority you will
find time to do it. If something else is more important then won't...and you may have something else you have to prioritise and that could well be sitting with a cuppa after being constantly exhausted or reading a book or chilling out so that you can recharge flat batteries. It all depends on what you prioritise.

Youcunnyfunt · 27/02/2025 22:21

I actually do relate, a bit, although I absolutely know some people who pack so much in their day they would have to stop doing something to make room for exercise. People who are carers, have young children, single parents…

But, I have had the annoying comments about how much exercise I do. It’s usually smug mummies, you know the type (with money), who sigh, and say, I don’t know how you do it, I just don’t have the tiiime (at a million kid’s clubs or socialising).

Sunhatweather · 27/02/2025 22:38

Thornybush · 27/02/2025 20:22

That's very harsh. Exercise is very important for body and mind, there's no need to ridicule the op for prioritising her health.

Show quote history

Well, yes - that’s the point. It’s not nice to judge harshly, is it? If OP can judge other people for not fitting in exercise, I can judge her just as harshly for not working as hard or as long as me. See what I did there?

Sunhatweather · 27/02/2025 22:41

Completelyjo · 27/02/2025 20:36

I mean to be fair you don’t want to and that’s fine but it’s not quite the same as not actually having time.
If your kids are teens you could go for a run or do a home workout at any time before your DH gets home, and after he gets home there’s still 2 hours before you like to get into bed.
Its not the same level of “not having time” as actually caring for young children who need constant supervision. You do have the ability, you just choose not to.

Show quote history

Ah, you’re telling me how to parent my teens so I can fit in exercise? Are you aware of their needs? No, didn’t think so. Please don’t comment on my ability.

Vannymcvan · 27/02/2025 23:13

Maybe they don't want to and maybe just mind your own business

HelloVeraPlant · 27/02/2025 23:21

We all need to find our version of keeping fit. Some of us hate running but love the gym. Some prefer sport. Some o us panick when we go up a dress size and some don’t care.

I think we are always too busy to do the things we don’t care about or the things that we don’t enjoy deep down. Not everyone is sporty.

somanythingssolittletime · 27/02/2025 23:26

Hollyandivygoout · 27/02/2025 09:43

I run about 4 miles, 4 times a week. I’m in a routine and force myself to do it even when I can’t be arsed. It takes me about 30-40 minutes each time I go for a run and I squeeze it in early morning, before dinner, just whenever I can really. I work full time and have 2DC who are admittedly at secondary school now, but this is something I’ve always done.
My AIBU is finding it annoying when people tell me they don’t have time to do any exercise. It’s like they’re so busy and important and I’ve got all the time in the world. I honestly don’t believe that the vast majority of people can’t squeeze in half an hour a few times a week.

Who looks after your kids when you go for a run? How much time do you actually need? Change clothes, run, shower and change. I assume you do shower afterwards??

i used to be you before I had kids. I ran, went to the gym. Exercising was my life. When I was pregnant I found a gym with a crèche because I was convinced I would be back exercising the minute I was cleared after my 6 week postpartum appointment.. I genuinely believed that and had every intention to do it. Well guess what.. My kid is 6 years old and only now I am finally at a place where I have the mental and physical capacity to start exercising again. And I am talking 50 minutes max, including changing and showering. And I do it on my lunch break when I work from home. Because that is genuinely the only time I have between working full time, doing drop off and pick up, doing all the housework, cooking, cleaning. Yes I have a husband, yes we share the load. I still don’t have time for myself with kids of primary age who need mummy all the time..

My mental health suffered greatly because I missed exercising every day since I had my kids and I was gutted when I genuinely couldn’t find the time in my day to work out.

So yes, some of us want to but don’t have the time to. Consider yourself lucky and judge less.

Creamteasandbumblebees · 27/02/2025 23:36

If you don't make time for your wellness, you will be forced to make time for your illness.

Everyone has the same 24 hours in a day
Yes I work, yes I have kids, yes I have one SEN kid, yes I keep a house, yes I have pets, yes I have elderly parents etc...the only thing I don't have are excuses.
If you want to, you will.

WhatK8DidNext · 27/02/2025 23:39

Not that I have to explain myself to you, but …

Full time work, two neurodivergent children, part-time PhD, husband who works away, no family nearby for childcare, chronic illness and a mobility issue, etc etc …

I’m not complaining, I just think you should be aware that not everyone has the same life as you before you judge.

SlaveToAGoldenRetriever · 27/02/2025 23:42

What a judgy, patronising and tone deaf post. I was a single parent, working full time in a very active job to made ends meet with a house to run and a child to look after. To squeeze anything else into my day I would’ve had to give up sleep.

Treesandsheepeverywhere · 27/02/2025 23:47

Have you always done it?

I have, on and off.

On when I'm in control and everything going to plan.
Off when life gets in the way.

Just because they're too busy now, doesn't mean they'll never make time.

It's like those people who decide to stop wearing make-up/doing their hair and expect everyone else to do so at the same time.

People have different priorities at different times.

Tintackedsea · 27/02/2025 23:50

And you care how other people live their life because...?

What do you want from this post? What are you achieving?

You want people to feel guilty about how shit they are in comparison to you?
You want to feel excellent about your own choices?
Do you want a list of other people's responsibilities that you don't have?
Are you interested in the multitude of things - learning Swahili, writing a novel, crocheting blankets for abandoned dachshunds - that you aren't doing while you are busy running?

Cop yourself on.

Dancygigglebox · 27/02/2025 23:55

I’m a single parent of 3 young DC, I work full time and am also in my last year of a degree. I don’t have time to run, besides even if I did, I don’t like it, never have and even if I did, I can’t after surgery a few years ago. I do however try to walk 5 miles every day during my lunch break. I don’t criticise people who don’t exercise, it’s their life not mine. I suggest you get off your high horse and do what you want and leave others to do what they want.

TheCaretakerNadine · 27/02/2025 23:59

Im sorry op but this has really hit a nerve with me. Because you are incredibly tone deaf- have you ever considered that there are plenty of parents out there who want to work out but there isnt enough time in the day?

We have a 1yr old and a 3yr old-both shoddy sleepers, we both work, have no family nearby so childcare is mostly us/nursery. My kids wake at 7 and sleep at 8pm - at the end of a tiring day, after tidying kitchen, sorting laundry, id rather recuperate from the day and go to sleep, especially as our nights are full of nightwakes.

Pre kids, we both worked out 6x a week. Ive accepted that its not my season to workout in these years. But will be when kids are more self sufficient.

Dont assume that people who dont exercise are lazy, maybe they too worry about this.

Get off your high horse.

DodoTired · 28/02/2025 00:04

there is full time and there is full time
i for example have long hours

Starlightstarbright4 · 28/02/2025 00:04

I can’t run I have arthritis in my knee .. however exercise doesn’t need to be defined by going out to an activity - hoovering , mopping changing bedding also exercise .

everyone with limited time makes choices - some people might not change bedding as often as others, not iron , clean the bathroom less frequently , cook from scratch / ready meals ..

so yes we make choices on what is going on and for many it isn’t their top priority .

Bestfootforward11 · 28/02/2025 00:11

Well done you but not sure of the point of the post. To say that people that don’t do what you do are lazy? That they are pretending they are so busy? I don’t understand at all why it bothers you. Surely the obvious answer is people lead different lives and don’t all see the world as you do? The more important thing is to consider why you are thinking about it so much that you needed to post.

Notimeforaname · 28/02/2025 00:24

There are ways to do things , not necessarily running 4 miles a day but there are plenty of small things that can be done throughout your time at home that do add up.

Things like doing standing push ups against the kitchen counter if waiting a couple minutes for something to boil/cook.
If you're bored off your tits talking to your child while they're thrashing around the bath, be bored but be squatting.

If you have to work all day at home and your back/equipment allows it, work standing up for some of the time or sit on a balance ball.
If you're reading, try to read the first page while doing a plank.
If you're mindlessly scrolling on your phone, do that on your back but while air cycling🤣

I do highly recommend 10-minute pilates videos on YouTube. There are so many. All you need is a floor. Though I use my bad and it's fine.