If someone says “I work in A&E”

[whyeyeeyeeyeeye]

Then do you presume

a) he’s a doctor and doesn’t want people to know so he doesn’t get bothered with child illness/fever questions etc

b) he does another role in A&E and wants to keep it vague for another reason

DH and I were chatting to a dad at a kids’ party at the weekend and we came away from the conversation with different views. I’m a - if I were a doctor in A&E no way would I want all my kid’s friends’ parents knowing.

This. I'd think he was a bit of a wanker and avoid him - why not just say what you do? Unless he's embarrassed bc it's a lowly job?

I know several Doctors and none of them would say something like that. They'd say "I'm a cardiologist" or "I'm a surgeon" or whatever.

No it isn't, that's intrusive.

I don't get the intrigue, this person is not a well known friend.

I would assume they did a job in A&E that people were unlikely to have heard of so it’s easier not to give the job title and have the inevitable ‘oh whats that?’ Conversation.

Oh I'm sure. My ex was just a knob! 😂

I would assume they did a job in A&E that people were unlikely to have heard of so it’s easier not to give the job title and have the inevitable ‘oh whats that?’ Conversation.

@sammylady37 I’m a GP and I usually vaguely say that I work for the NHS or at a doctor’s surgery, and people generally then tend to assume I am admin/reception or sometimes the cleaner which suits me fine! I once got through a whole week of a single parent holiday without anyone finding out I was a doctor which was great. I just wanted to relax, try to connect with people, and not be asked to work for free on my holiday! But I bet if I was a man people would guess differently at what I do for a living. And maybe would be a bit less likely to ask them random health queries at a party also?

I found being vague about my job tended to lead to further questioning.

Woman at party: so what do you do?
Me: I work for [public sector body]
WIP: And what do you do there?
Me: I provide support to the CEO and Directors.
WIP: And what does that involve?

etc etc

@LunaTheCat 😮

@SylviasShoes trust me, people absolutely do this all the time. I am extremely grateful to close friends and family who don’t pester me with medical queries all the time. I would of course be happy to talk them through a serious concern. But acquaintances can sometimes be super cheeky. I once had an acquaintance (a school gates mum I know) drive her kid over to mine at 11.30pm on a weeknight with no notice and aggressively ring my doorbell (I was asleep!) because she wanted me to check him over as he had tonsillitis again. Instead of calling 111 “because this is quicker”. The problem is that the same person would be the first to turn on me if I ultimately made a wrong call. People really don’t think through what a huge and unfair ask this is to 1. Ask someone to work for free when they’d never ask anyone in another profession, and 2. Take moral if not legal responsibility for medical advice given for themselves or their kids (especially for kids who notoriously can be fine one minute and seriously unwell with sepsis the next). Which could seriously affect any social relationship you have if you make a wrong call.

I used to work for a water company. I used to say that I worked in the control room. Well yes, I did if I was working a weekend or on call overnight, as it would have been lonely in the main office and there were free seats and access to the TV. (You'd be surprised at how much water consumption goes up after the "doof doofs" on Eastenders!)
However I was the person taking the calls from the public about their lack of water or blocked drains . (I was doing call centre work on the phone number published on the side of the fleet vehicles).

If he was a doctor I'd assume he would just say that. If he had a non medical role then 'I work in A&E' would lead people to think he was 'important' without having to say what he actually did. Of course everyone who works in a hospital plays a crucial role, but saying leaving it vague leads to two things: further questions, or perhaps admiration for a (presumably) tough job. It would not occur to me that he was being vague so he wouldn't be pestered by people. My father was a doctor and was on occasion but really he had to have thick skin as many people wanted to complain about THEIR doctor and the profession in general, rather than ask his advice. My sister is also a doctor but no one bothers her.

This!!!

Used to date a man who would simply answer he was a doctor in such discussions. Anyone who then brought up anything medical he would look very serious and concerned and diagnose some rare condition , amazingly there are a handful that fit almost any symptoms. He is a doctor of wine. (Oenology and viticulture)

I'd simply take comment as he doesn't want to talk about his job.

I have been a hospital consultant for many years. If someone asks, I say I work in a hospital. If that prompt further questions I tell them what I do. I don’t hide it, and I don’t go on about it. I’m not sure what the ‘right’ answer is. I am more than happy to chat about stuff other than people’s jobs!

Everyone I know who says that works on reception.

Otherwise they say they're a doctor, surgeon etc.

Exactly.

I fail to 'get' all the intrigue about the job of this particular guy. Who cares?

User: "It's clearly something you tell other people in order to impress them. A&E obviously implies you're saving lives, dealing with emergencies..."

You've been watching too much Casualty.

I fully agree. It’s very CF territory to expect someone to give professional advice for free, and then to take on responsibility for that advice. They’d be the first to complain and sue if something went wrong.

@Queenofparcels no not at all. @liveforsummer I work in patient safety, putting together child death reviews.

OK, my bad for making an assumption.

That must be difficult and challenging for you.

Kudos to you.

i wouldn’t assume either - I’d listen to what they said and take that as what they meant. I have a close friend that does the same, she doesn’t go into details I know many nurses that don’t tell strangers they are nurses as that seems to invite strangers to tell them
everything that has ever been wrong with them!

I'd assume a nurse or doctor.

@HiCandles,
'I work for the NHS' seems to be used exclusively by non-clinical people.

Not true. I know a few who say this.

Why does it even matter?! 😆

Im bewildered that people think this deeply about someone they don’t know, it’s not a date, you don’t need to find out and he doesn’t need to tell you!

When I go on holiday, especially when I was working, I say I am an accountant at a sewage farm, That usually kills that converstaion dead.
As someone said, I do not want to be giving consultations when I am off duty.