To think life gets worse, not better, as you age?

[HangryCrab]

People say “it gets better,” but does it really? More responsibilities, declining health, fewer friends, and work until you die - what exactly is getting better?

Depends on many variables, which can change quickly. Overall it’s a balance as you age of responsibility v autonomy.

What age are you talking about? Why working until you die? I don’t this 100% is not true for many people

True there's hope when you're young.

My childcare responsibilities have declined as I got older.
Fewer friends need not be a thing.

I’m 51. My life started getting better when I got divorced at 40 & it’s been improving ever since, so it’s all relative.

This is going to be true for some. If you've got a good set up with family, friends and work and it continues then I can see things getting better. If you don't then there's less and less opportunity to create a good set up and I could see how things could become worse with time as you get more and more fed up of it.

Agree with the hope when you're young.

I felt this way after hitting my 40s. That the best was behind me.

But I have so many unfulfilled ambitions, I’m trying to think that some more amazing stuff is yet to come. I have to believe that, or I slide into depression.

Is there something that you always wanted to do when you were younger, but didn’t? Could you put your spare energy into making it happen?

All my MIL talks about are her dead, dying or ill friends. I don’t want that to be me.

Priorities change.

Better or worse is not really the correct term.

Live or die, it is always your choice.

No, as cliche as it sounds, it’s what you make of it. If you sit around moaning about hard done by you are like a lot of people do, of course you are going to feel shit. I don’t think age has anything to do with it. You can have a shit childhood and a good adulthood, or vice versa. Every situation is different.

My health took a dive last year at 58, still recovering and fingers crossed but it depends on so many variables. Money, love and friendships all fine currently. One of my children died a few years ago so quite frankly I have dealt with the worst thing life can throw at you and survived. I have felt sad but never bitter.

More money. No childcare responsibilities. More free time. Know yourself better. Care less what others think.

The future's bright.

Depends on the age brackets I suppose.

I grew up in poverty and an abusive household.

I worked on a low salary as a single parent to a baby and felt drained and spent 24/7.

DS is now a bit older and I'm really discovering who I am. I'm fulfilled in my career and enjoy parenting, and have enough money so I can explore interests, have babysitters and a bit of freedom. As he gets older there will be fun holidays with him, more adventure for me and hopefully a loving relationship (which I'm putting off for now because of DS!)

Life is far better now than it's ever been, and I can only see it getting better. I may be seeing this all with rose coloured glasses but the bubble hasn't broken yet!

The freedom of not giving a shit has been a massive weight off my neurotic shoulders.

I don't much care for getting older but I think I am happier now at 62 than I was at 42. Still working full time btw. I would like to have more energy and a bit more free time though.

I’m 54, post menopausal and the happiest I’ve ever been. I don’t have children, so my only family stresses are watching my parents age, thankfully they are still largely ok for now. Financially we are very lucky and in touching distance of paying off the mortgage. I don’t care what people think about me anymore, so no more stressing about that. I am grateful for everything that I have and try to count my blessings daily. It’d be nice to still have my 20s figure, but I will trade that for feeling settled, happy and content!

I'm excited for the future. Excited for my retirement. What bliss. House wlll be paid off, pensions in the bank, fingers crossed all goes ok health wise. So much wonderful time. Grandchildren 🤞🏻.I can't wait.

I'd like to have better mobility but my life is miles better than it was 30 years ago. I'm still able to work in a job I like, I have plenty of friends and can make a lot of my own choices.

I am 53 and also doing better in some ways than I ever have, and content in many areas.

Women are constantly being told ageing is terrible. Don't fall for that.

I believe there is evidence that people generally get happier in the second half of their lives. Of course this isn't true for everyone and also reflects the typical life stages people go through.

You may have a happy childhood or a traumatic one. You may love school or have a horrible teen period.

Most people who have kids find lot of stress, financial and time pressure when the kids are young. This eases off, and one day you find yourself with weekends to do as much or as little of as you like.

Where people are having kids later I think you naturally get more of a run into job pressures, finance and family pressures at the same time your parents are getting older and may need more care. Being halfway through, in itself, is a wobble for many people.

As my three are almost grown up now I try and choose to fill my life with activities and people that give my life joy and purpose. If I get the average number of years for women, I'm exactly half way through and I'm looking forward to the next half of my life.

I was SO excited for my DC to grow up but when they did.. I didn’t like it. It’s boring and lonely at times.

Life is what you make it blah blah but nothing is really fun anymore. Nobody does a lot due to the expense of living.

Life has ups and downs all the way through. Personally I haven't found that it gets better or worse in a general way as I get older (I'm 50 now) - it just depends if I'm going through a tricky bit or a smooth bit at that particular time.

How old are you talking? I'm mid-40s and life is as good as ever.

That's why they say that youth is wasted on the young. Definitely more pressure and responsibility as you age but otherwise I know myself better and am happier.

Mine has got much better. My children are independent and I've reached a position at work where I'm paid for responsibility not activity and where I have autonomy. This means I have more of the big three that imo make for a better life. More time, more money and more freedom.

It all depends on your outlook. If you’re a ‘glass half empty’ then you’ll likely see the challenges. But with ageing comes more life experience, generally more income/stability and the ability to say no to things you don’t want.
I was stressed and overworked when the kids were young. Did far too much for others (they’re not friends now and probably never were).
Now they’re older I can do more of what I enjoy (thankfully still have good health).
At any age you can choose to focus on the positives, or not. Each stage of life is different.