Functional Birthday Present

[RandomUser456878]

Wanting to hear opinions on this birthday present

My girlfriend is 39 weeks pregnant, its her birthday this week & she's due the week after. For a while she's mentioned about getting either a coffee machine or a kettle for our bedroom. Everytime we go to a hotel, we say we should get one for our room.

Anyhow, a few days back I saw an Ad for a Russell Hobbs 'Calm' Kettle. Its a 'quiet boil' kettle that places soothing, meditation like sounds while its boiling. Video linked here Hadn't seen anything like this before and thought it was quite unique.

Also Thought it would be perfect for making cups of tea in the night/Morning, while soothing the baby with the noises instead of waking it up with the noises of a kettle & we could use for sterilising if we needed too.

Along side the kettle, I got some nice mugs from Dunelm, some little spoons & a matching tray & matching bowl for used teabags. Teabags, Coffee Sachets & Milk Sachets.
Essentially made up a little area like a hotel in our bedroom
Spent £150 in total

It arrived today so set it up & said she can have her birthday present early. But she was abit disappointed. She thinks its a 'house purchase' and shouldn't be a birthday present.
By 'House Purchase' she means just a standard thing we should just buy for the house.

To add some more context on our situation... We have alot of disposible income each month & pretty much buy whatever we want/need so we're hard to buy presents for.
We're also pretty much sorted for the baby so don't need anything there. Our parents gave us money for Christmas which we've just banked for the baby.

AIBU - Crap Present, It should be a standard buy
AINBU - Good Present

Yeah exactly.

Its also a light hearted post. I just wanted opinions (from a female / new mum point of view)

Me: Here's your birthday present
Her: That's a house present
Me: Ahh sound, I'll get you something else.

Nothing more said

I think it’s a thoughtful present tbh, I just think practical presents for women is a tricky area!

I also prefer to buy presents for the ‘life situation’ but think it’s a bit different in pregnancy as there is a risk the presents won’t actually be used by mum but just baby. I was pregnant last Christmas and got loads of gifts that were for the baby. A relative gave me bottles, baby clothes and a blanket. They gave my DH some slippers and books he had asked for! It can be a tricky time for women feeling like they’ve lost their time identity. And the reality is that with a newborn you might be too knackered to have any ‘pamper sessions’ with them.

Can you just get a big bunch of flowers for her birthday and some nice perfume/chocolate/bath products/gymwear etc that’s still a good gift but totally non-baby related?

How much water does that kettle hold or do you have a water tap in your bedroom? Cups of teas and bottles...

This is something I would absolutely love but maybe your partner is different to me
I'm a tea addict and get up through the night to make cups. When ds was first born I'd sit and wait and wait desperate for him to fall asleep so I could make one quickly in the kitchen, then be disappointed it was never right because I was rushing back and didn't have time to brew it so I'd definitely have appreciated the thought and effort from my DP

The thought was there op, don't give yourself a hard time. It is good you have a lot of disposable income and it's not her birthday yet so have time to have a think about what else to get that she will (may....) be pleased about... it might be best to just ask her what she wants tho in case it's 'wrong' again. Which is totally possible as hormones are mental at the last stage of pregnancy so just beware

I love practical presents and would be so happy to receive something like this, especially if I had said I wanted one

If I am gifted money, I often buy housey type stuff

But I'm not interested at all in jewellery or beauty products or spa days...So thats me

I think presents like this have to be chosen for the audience or you end up missing the mark (like you did... extremely thoughtful gift but not quite well received)

You are not unreasonable to have bought this and it was so well intended but I can see why some wouldnt feel it a special gift just for them

I’d be touched if you had done that for the pregnancy / new parenthood, but really disappointed if that were my birthday present, especially as you say you have enough money to buy something more personal and exciting and also with her being pregnant. Make sure you spoil her properly when the day comes.

Being honest, we tend to just buy things we need/want ourselves. Like last month, I bought a new phone so I'd have longer battery life incase she goes in labour & my batteries dead. We don't tend to wait for birthdays or save for things.
So I can't think of anything off the top of my head that she wouldn't just buy, other than a bigger car

She has 0 interest in bags, clothes, shoes. I got her a pair of trainers for Christmas she'd asked for. Same with Jewellery, she just wears a garmin watch but its maybe a year old so doesn't need replacing

I could maybe buy her some non-maternity clothes for the gym/yoga so she has some nice outfits.

We travel, thats our thing & also how we met. As an example, During her pregnancy we've been away quite abit.
Spain & France (on a cruise 2nd week of pregnancy). Albania, Greece, Romania, Malta & Dublin.
We also tend to travel about on our holidays which will change. Albania for example, we stayed in 10 different hotels as we travelled down the coast & back up.

Her last birthday, we did 5 days in Lisbon which was her present

I think you made a thoughtful purchase, you listened to her wishes and chose special options with her in mind .

but at the same time I think you should have also purchased something just for her, something that isn’t mum or baby related,

my husband has purchased me some very functional gifts for the house, and whilst they are always ideal and fulfil something I’ve expressed interest in, I do always feel a bit sad.

because I might justify purchasing something for the house, but rarely prioritise things that are more gift like for me especially since the kids have arrived.

which means I rarely get frivolous but appreciated gifts
maybe that’s what she was hoping for

Oh yeah I didn't think to mention that. Its 1.7Ltrs but we have an tap in our Ensuite.

Our bedrooms the full top floor so have plenty of space for the Next to me crib & baby's changing on 1 side. Then her makeup & the drinks setup would on another set of draws down the other side

She's carrying your child. You should be buying her jewellery, chocolates and flowers, op, alongside the gift xx

I’d have loved this! But I still remember when my dad bought my mum kitchen knives for Christmas that really didn’t go down well…looks like personal gifts are the preference for your partner which is fair enough!. You mentioned you both buy yourself things when you need it, so maybe do something like printing and framing photos or creating a photo book of baby’s first days or something.

@Thereunion that’s the mugs 😂

They do have handles, just a bad photo

I thinks it’s nice and thoughtful but agree with others that there should have been another present just for her. I’m more concerned that you’re considering booking a trip to Thailand with a baby. Sounds mad to me. Everyone’s different I know and some can make it work but being stuck on a plane with a baby for a long haul sounds hellish. Even if you think you have a happy baby they can go through phases of not being one.

Haha, don't worry we're thinking australia & NZ for next winter too 😂Our friends (who just had babys) are all telling us that we're going to be in for a shock

My cousins in Dubai too, so we'll be going there at that at some point

Just fyi op, babies can be up to two weeks ISH late and that's a normal timeline. A brand new baby cannot be in a car seat more than 30 mins. Travel to Wales might be tricky!

They can but I wouldn't go with a newborn. So much more important to bond and settle at home. And rest!

Its just 1.5 hours door to door from ours to where we're going. So we should be alright with a couple of stops

But I do appreciate the help & advice so thanks for that. Its a brand new world for us so all the advice we can get the better. Its crazy they don't have more guidance on all this stuff outside of the bump to baby classes

I would personally love that as a present!

In fact I really want one now 😂

I think different taste here. They would go to charity shop if I was gifted them. But if your wife likes them it's super

Haha, hold out & you'll see mine on vinted next week

It's called common sense tbh.

Ohh that does give me an idea actually. She did mention a few months back a polaroid camera for when people come round to meet the baby. One of our friends did it & made a book or something out of them

Thanks, I'll have a look

We wouldn't have them in our kitchen so wouldn't have them down here. But they match our natural colour scheme in the bedroom

Na haha Although I did see it myself on a facebook ad

Never did I think I'd see (or buy) a kettle that made sounds but after buying tonnes of baby toys that play a similar sound, it seems like the perfect combo

do NOT do this
its the naffest thing ever
absolutely gross