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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Possibly pregnant

42 replies

Rainydays321 · 21/02/2025 09:49

Sorry I could not find a two week wait chat or ttc chat so posting here. Wanted to get some opinions/stories from others who have been through simillar. Myself and DH NOT actively trying for another baby (currently have DS and DD and happy with my lot) HOWEVER I am currently on CD 35 with no signs of af. Had unprotected sex sometime at begining of the month 😂 not tracking anything. Had a mid cycle bleed ond CD 16 and thought it was ovulation (a day of pinkish discharge when wiping) but now Im starting to wonder… I feel like af is about to start any minute, twinges, lower back pain, heavy feeling in lower abdomen, but have not had my usual monthly break out of spots and no af. Have ordered pregnancy test but im scared. Ive got rid of all baby stuff and youngest is about to start school full time in September. Could it just be a late cycle?

OP posts:
27Maisie27 · 21/02/2025 09:52

What will you do if you are pregnant? Your symptoms could mean early pregnancy as well as late period. You have plenty of time to make a decision.

Original poster
Rainydays321 · 21/02/2025 10:15

27Maisie27 · 21/02/2025 09:52

What will you do if you are pregnant? Your symptoms could mean early pregnancy as well as late period. You have plenty of time to make a decision.

It would be a bit of a shock as we had to actively try both times with my DS and DD, we tried for 4 and a half years for DD and I always wanted 2 lo. I struggled with pp anxiety and depression with both. DD is 3 1/2 and I am finally feeling like myself so I am a little bit worried.

OP posts:
Original poster
Rainydays321 · 21/02/2025 13:29

Bump x

OP posts:
McGregor33 · 21/02/2025 13:35

If you’re not taking any contraception or precautions then you are trying and there is a chance you could be pregnant.

Given your update it doesn’t seem like you’re entirely sure if you want to be pregnant I would start taking precaution if you are not pregnant.

Could you go to the local shop and get a test? Saves waiting on one coming and puts your mind at ease either way.

FeelingSoOverwhelmed · 21/02/2025 13:54

You've had unprotected sex. Of course you could be pregnant.
I don't really understand your post tbh. You're said you're not actively trying, but you seem to be monitoring your cycle very closely and not using contraception. Wtf is actively trying then?

I think since you don't seem to want a baby, you should take a test, find out what your situation is, make a decision from there...and then stop trying for a baby you don't want!!! There's a lot of contraceptive options out there.

Original poster
Rainydays321 · 21/02/2025 14:02

FeelingSoOverwhelmed · 21/02/2025 13:54

You've had unprotected sex. Of course you could be pregnant.
I don't really understand your post tbh. You're said you're not actively trying, but you seem to be monitoring your cycle very closely and not using contraception. Wtf is actively trying then?

I think since you don't seem to want a baby, you should take a test, find out what your situation is, make a decision from there...and then stop trying for a baby you don't want!!! There's a lot of contraceptive options out there.

Not monitoring cycle, gone back to work things out, I usually keep an eye-ish on things to know roughly when ill be on as I have an active lifestyle lots of swimming etc. activley trying for me was actually tracking ovulation and knowingly having sex on those days as we wanted a baby. It took years each time with both current DC. Never mind, I came for advice not sure by now why not to be told yo stop trying for a baby I dont want!!

OP posts:
FeelingSoOverwhelmed · 21/02/2025 14:08

Sorry for not wording things the way you wanted... I just mean for me, actively trying involved getting my coil taken out and having sex! I just assumed if someone has unprotected sex it's because they want to get pregnant/don't mind the idea of a baby? Otherwise you'd use contraception to make sure you didn't get pregnant?

Anyway hope you get the result you want but from an advice point of view I think the only way you'd know is by taking a test.

Feelinglost10 · 21/02/2025 14:11

This reply has been withdrawn

The OP has privacy concerns about this thread, so we're taking it down now.

Herewegoagain8 · 21/02/2025 14:15

It’s possibly a late period or you could be pregnant, I’d pop out and get a test straight away instead of driving yourself mad. I’m pregnant with an unplanned third, it’s best to find out ASAP and you’ve plenty of times for discussions and decision making if it turns out you are pregnant.

MotionofTime · 21/02/2025 14:28

How would anyone here know?!

Just get a test.

1smallhamsterfoot · 21/02/2025 14:29

Walk/drive/bus/fly to a shop, buy a test, piss on it. You'll know instantly.

nodramaplz · 21/02/2025 14:35

Just go buy a test at the chemist!

Original poster
Rainydays321 · 21/02/2025 14:36

MotionofTime · 21/02/2025 14:28

How would anyone here know?!

Just get a test.

Ive ordered a test because our nearest shop is a half an hour drive away and I don’t currently have my car. The ordered tests will get here faster than my car will. Yesterday I was in the frame of mind that I was just a little bit late. This morning I was “shit” so ordered tests, came on here to see if anyone else had some dort of bleed on CD 16 and ended up pregnant. It was just a conversation I wanted to have 🤷🏻‍♀️🤷🏻‍♀️

OP posts:
Original poster
Rainydays321 · 21/02/2025 14:44

1smallhamsterfoot · 21/02/2025 14:29

Walk/drive/bus/fly to a shop, buy a test, piss on it. You'll know instantly.

Please see my comment below about nearest shop being a good half hour drive away, and not currently having my car. I just wanted a conversation with people who had ever been in a similar situation, in particular the mid cycle bleed. Never mind

OP posts:
ShowOfHands · 21/02/2025 14:51

There are lots of TWW and TTC chats in the conception topic. I can link it if you can't find your way there?

AIBU is a very robust place to ask for support and likely not populated by people at the same stage of life. It can also seem incredibly brutal when you're dealing with something sensitive.

Back in the mists of time, I found the conception topic very supportive.

Best of British with whatever happens when you finally test.

Original poster
Rainydays321 · 21/02/2025 14:53

ShowOfHands · 21/02/2025 14:51

There are lots of TWW and TTC chats in the conception topic. I can link it if you can't find your way there?

AIBU is a very robust place to ask for support and likely not populated by people at the same stage of life. It can also seem incredibly brutal when you're dealing with something sensitive.

Back in the mists of time, I found the conception topic very supportive.

Best of British with whatever happens when you finally test.

Please :) thank you I did look in the topics section but for some reason could not find it. Yes I remember with my first when having difficulties what a supportive place mumsnet was x

OP posts:
Herewegoagain8 · 21/02/2025 15:14

Rainydays321 · 21/02/2025 14:44

Please see my comment below about nearest shop being a good half hour drive away, and not currently having my car. I just wanted a conversation with people who had ever been in a similar situation, in particular the mid cycle bleed. Never mind

Show quote history

In answer to your question about a mid cycle bleed, it could have been an implantation bleed - how heavy was it? I’ve been pregnant several times and only ever had an implantation bleed once that was tiny, as in a spot of blood on wiping but other people have mistaken implantation bleeds for periods. Hopefully your test arrives quickly and gives you an answer either way.

Notanother0nee · 21/02/2025 15:22

This reply has been deleted

The OP has privacy concerns about this thread, so we're taking it down now.

Exactly this.

Get a test, and grow up.

You didnt use contraception, you could be pregnant, or you might not be.

no one here knows.

Original poster
Rainydays321 · 21/02/2025 15:25

Notanother0nee · 21/02/2025 15:22

Exactly this.

Get a test, and grow up.

You didnt use contraception, you could be pregnant, or you might not be.

no one here knows.

Show quote history

Did you not read my reply 😂

OP posts:
Eldermilleniallyogii · 21/02/2025 15:27

Not really sure what you're expecting us to tell you. You've had unprotected sex and your period is late so surely you'd just get a test rather than ask some strangers who have no idea whether or not you're pregnant.

Also it annoys me when people post crap in AIBU as I enjoy reading the actual AIBU threads.

Original poster
Rainydays321 · 21/02/2025 15:35

Eldermilleniallyogii · 21/02/2025 15:27

Not really sure what you're expecting us to tell you. You've had unprotected sex and your period is late so surely you'd just get a test rather than ask some strangers who have no idea whether or not you're pregnant.

Also it annoys me when people post crap in AIBU as I enjoy reading the actual AIBU threads.

Well im sorry for annoying you today ☺️ you poor thing, hope your ok

OP posts:
Notanother0nee · 21/02/2025 15:39

@Rainydays321 you’re definitely the sort of person who checks in to A&E on social media then is all “PM me hun” in the comments.

complete unnecessary drama.

Original poster
Rainydays321 · 21/02/2025 15:53

Notanother0nee · 21/02/2025 15:39

@Rainydays321 you’re definitely the sort of person who checks in to A&E on social media then is all “PM me hun” in the comments.

complete unnecessary drama.

Well im not but ok, believe me the things ive been through in life without an ounce of selfish drama or telling anyone anything about it, but you carry on making your assumptions :) Dont worry, I wont bother with ‘mumsnet’ ever again. Such an unpleasant bunch of people, never seen anything quite like it tbh. Never posted anything of this sort before, lesson learned never again :) will continue with my usual no messing carry on way of dealing with everything. And shoot me dead please lord if I ever use such phrases as ‘pm me hun’ god 🙄🙄

OP posts:
Original poster
Rainydays321 · 21/02/2025 16:00

Notanother0nee · 21/02/2025 15:39

@Rainydays321 you’re definitely the sort of person who checks in to A&E on social media then is all “PM me hun” in the comments.

complete unnecessary drama.

and you are deffinatley the sort of person who takes pleasure in making others feel bad and gets some sort of weird power thrill from it.

OP posts:
Owl23 · 21/02/2025 16:04

https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/conception

Conception chat area hopefully linked above. People there are a lot more supportive.