Going all out for your kids on valentines day

[Supergirl1958]

Seriously when did that become a thing! Tonight I’ve been told it’s ’on me’ that I feel guilty because it’s splashed all over my social media feeds about the efforts parents have gone to, balloons, presents, cakes, breakfasts for their children on Valentine’s Day?

Like AIU to think it shouldn’t be another thing to pressure parents into feeling guilty? Like the elf and so on!!

Wow! Thanks! I’m insane now! Do you have a psychology degree?

Or Victor Meldrew. I don't believe it.

Of course! Maybe I should rename the thread 4291?

@Supergirl1958
Do you suffer from low self-esteem?

Says the person who claimed that it's 'all for the likes'?

That's rather a sweeping and judgemental statement too, is it not? What a superpower you have!

That's why I think this is a wind up.

We do a picnic tea with heart-shaped stuff 😂. Tbh it's easier than cooking our normal Friday dinner, so win-win.

The thing is... once you're over 25 and definitely when you're a few kids down the line, the gloss of going out for an overpriced meal and exchanging soppy cards with insincere messages wears off. So it just becomes another day, and if you can have a bit of low-key fun with the kids, why not? Mine loved searching for chocolate hearts after school. But we won't be posting on SM, because we don't live our lives that way.

I'm talking about people taking pictures of what they have done for their kids and posting it on social media for likes and approval because if they didn't, it never happened apparently.

People can do what they want with their kids. I celebrated of many occasions with my child but not once did I take pictures of them, get them developed at Max speilman and start handing out the pictures to Acquaintances or distant family saying "look what effort I've gone to, what did you do?" I know it's a generation thing but it's just still bonkers to me 😜

But if you have genuinely gone through your life putting something on social media and not expecting the likes for doing it, then you’re a better person than me!

I have never, ever put something about my life on social media -ever - and if I did it wouldn’t be “for the likes” but for work purposes or to update friends & family far away.

There are thousands like me out there believe it or not. Probably most of us are over 40.

We are happier for it. You should try it.

Making your children feel loved and appreciated, oh, the horror! Life is hard, the world is tough, a little love goes a long way

Your friend isn't wrong. It is "on you" how you react to social media posts. Other people can choose to celebrate Valentine's Day however they choose. What makes you think they are "showing off for social media scoring points"? Maybe they just like to celebrate this holiday with their children. And why shouldn't they? I mean, it's not something I would do, but I have no issue with other people's choices.

Another way to make certain children feel excluded.

How depressing.

You shouldn’t feel guilty for not doing anything for your kids on Valentine’s Day, nor should others be judged for doing something for their kids on Valentine’s Day whether just because they want to or because they’re looking for validation on social media.

I think lots of people seek validation in their own way, and social media is an easier one for people to judge.

What did you want your friend to say to you? Not everyone will agree that you can blame social media for making you feel guilty, especially when it’s something we voluntarily engage with.

I bought my kids a heart shaped lolly each and they were over the moon. I’m up for any little celebration that brings a bit more cheer to this gloomy time of year!

You could say this about anything.

My parents never did valentines gifts for me, and I don’t plan on doing them for DD when she’s older (she’s a baby).

I personally associate Valentine’s Day with romantic love, rather than other kinds, so tend to just give DP a card, and a gift, and he does the same for me.

In fairness I post on social for the likes, and to update my family members. So I don’t think it’s a judgemental or sweeping statement, and anyone who has put a post on social media of any kind (not necessarily every post) and wasn’t expecting likes at some point is lying. That’s kind of what social media has become these days, a ‘look at me/DC/DP/DH’ and so on.

if you think I’m being judgemental and making sweeping statements then as I paraphrase my friend from my op ‘that’s on you’

and no I’m not winding anyone up. The current percentages on my poll tell me that I’m not alone in my view!

Given the current financial climate I’m totally inclined to agree. 😢

Just makes me sad to think of any kids not getting ‘love’ if this is becoming normalised at school.

Isn’t life hard enough for those on the edges already?

Awwwww capitalism. How adorable.
Ive been a parent most of my life, to 5 children and i tell them all I love them multiple times a day or when I see them. No one is convincing me that consumerism is better. Fuck that noise.

Damn the more people who don’t bother standing up to this BS, the longer it lasts. Think you yourselves people!! Ffs.

So why make it about one day? I show ‘a little love’ to my child every day. I don’t need to just show that I do it on valentines day

And yes I am judging. Dumbassery at its best.

I’m here for this! 🙌

We don't go all out. I bought an early Easter egg and some secondhand rock CDS for our teens who have suddenly gone all 'retro' with their music taste. We watched the last episode of Dexter and had a delicious takeaway from our local Bangladeshi restaurant.

I'm of an age where I think the gushing 'look at us were a couple' pictures on social media are unnecessary let alone involving children in this nonsense 🤣

Parents making an effort for their children on Valentine's Day? That's just ridiculous. Ignore the pressure, wherever that's come from.