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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to think some people think WFH should be a constant nose to the grindstone?

360 replies

Yodeloo · 12/02/2025 15:45

I think some jobs are like that definitely. Heavy workload, helplines etc

Some people think all WFH should be like this and get horrified because someone hung some washing out or helped out a family member for a short time. Plenty of jobs have flexibility and it is about getting the job done not just being present in front of the computer non stop.

I get all my life admin done throughout the day around work. I do an exercise class most mornings and then start work later on the days I WFH. I will meet up with friends, work on my side business. Nobody cares at my work. All targets are met consistently.

Is it jealousy that people get so upset?

OP posts:
ShapedLikeAPastry · 12/02/2025 17:15

Its failure to understand jobs are different.

Yup. I have no contracted hours at all. None. I am contracted to fulfill certain requirements and achieve certain outcomes. Obviously most of this work takes place during 'standard' office hours, because that's just generally more convenient, but it doesn't have to. Nowhere in my contract does it say X hours, X days.

3pm on a Sunday rather than 10am on a Monday? Sure, if I fancy it and it's appropriate. No one gives the tiniest of fucks if I take a few hours off as long as I'm not inconveniencing anyone else. It's because I have autonomy and I'm trusted to do my job.

People on here really struggle to get their heads around that.

Boxingshibes · 12/02/2025 17:16

I wfh half the time. I'm a trainer so am 'on' all the time. Do I put the washing on or prep for supper during my breaks? Hell yes. Does it mean I'm not doing a good job? No.
Very occasionally I get an admin day . I'll answer emails and chats, prep for training.
Many people have goes at people for not working but forget that there aren't jobs everywhere. Wfh means more people can work in places where there may not be an office. It speads the talent across the country not isolating it to big cities which must be a good thing?

ShapedLikeAPastry · 12/02/2025 17:17

StartingOverIn2025 · 12/02/2025 17:01

Yes I work hybrid now (used to be full time wfh) and I get really nervous about my teams going to amber - I dash to the loo and back in case people think I'm slacking, it's ridiculous really.

I couldn't bear a job like that. No one cares about my Teams status and they'd think I was nuts if I did.

Nothatgingerpirate · 12/02/2025 17:17

ThePartingOfTheWays · 12/02/2025 16:43

You don't think that maybe there's massive variation in jobs, and your limited experience doesn't qualify you to understand what constitutes shirking in all of them, then?

Possibly.

RickiRaccoon · 12/02/2025 17:21

I have a high-trust job where we can WFH. Some of the worry about it is jealousy where people have bad conditions so think others should too. Some is also projection where people know they themselves would be lazy at home so assume others are too.

I've done research degrees which were years of self-led work with occasional meetings with my supervisors so I just don't feel like I need someone checking up on me every hour to be productive.

My manager has said that, as she views it, work is different now and we can check things and generate data in an instant and on the move with phones and laptops and spreadsheets. I can have a bad cold but still work from bed if I feel up to it. That all lends itself to much more productivity so why make people trudge to the office and sit in a chair on top of that?

AllRightNowt · 12/02/2025 17:27

It's jealousy.
I've had out of home jobs where nipping out to run errands was fine. Also I had breaks, plus the odd hour where not a lot got done as staff were chatting etc. My tasks were always done and done well. The times where my employer needed me to step up and stay late or whatever, I was happy to do it as flexibility works both ways.
So many corporate nose to the grindstone people on MN, bitching about people who have more flexibility. If you don't like your job then change it, don't make nasty comments because others have negotiated different terms and conditions.

dovetail22uk · 12/02/2025 17:31

Yodeloo · 12/02/2025 15:45

I think some jobs are like that definitely. Heavy workload, helplines etc

Some people think all WFH should be like this and get horrified because someone hung some washing out or helped out a family member for a short time. Plenty of jobs have flexibility and it is about getting the job done not just being present in front of the computer non stop.

I get all my life admin done throughout the day around work. I do an exercise class most mornings and then start work later on the days I WFH. I will meet up with friends, work on my side business. Nobody cares at my work. All targets are met consistently.

Is it jealousy that people get so upset?

Myself and everyone in my team work from home. My line manager says "you're all adults and I know you get your work done so that's all I need". Our productivity is good and no one has complaints. Sometimes I pick up emails late in the evening. Sometimes I'll go to the shop in the day. It's really doesn't matter!

insomniacalways · 12/02/2025 17:31

I WFH we don't have an office and my colleagues are all over the UK. We are a training and consultancy organisation. Today I have been on video calls with 8 of them in different sessions. I've facilitated a 2-hour session online (for an international client) .Some colleagues I will talk with online every day, some it's just email or the team chat. Some colleagues I only meet in person - 3 times a year at our all staff away days. That includes members of my direct team. We still get on really well and discuss work and a bit personal - currently IVF for one and a poorly mother for the other. We all get our job done. I started at 8am I am finishing now 17.30pm that's normal. I've made a few cups of tea and a quick wrap for lunch - maybe 20 mins in total not at my desk. But somedays I will walk the kids to school or go to the Post Office. I do put my washing on and I do life admin (most of it is online people do that even in the office - I've seen enough screens open on ASOS when I visit clients to know being in an office doesn't mean people only do the office stuff!) If work is really busy I will work really late but then take time back at a quieter time. So long as I get my work done and keep bringing in new work no one cares really when it is done. I check my emails some evenings too. The fact I don't travel to an office makes me much more willing to travel for our client work and still have some kind of work-life balance. Of course there are jobs you cannot do from home but there are a lot you can with proper systems and support. It doesn't have to be an us and them.

ShapedLikeAPastry · 12/02/2025 17:33

Nothatgingerpirate · 12/02/2025 16:36

@rwalker
Quite.
I worked for two years, never needed
to afterwards.
Very fortunate.
Can't stand WFH and am convinced it's shirking, like that teacher a PP suggested.

Sorry, have I understood this correctly?

You have the grand total of two years experience of the world of work, and yet you believe yourself qualified to comment on everyone else's work ethic?

Supergirlscousin · 12/02/2025 17:35

I would say you’re not expected to be at your desk every minute of the working day whether in the office or at home and that regular breaks are important. So my view is that if I take a break to stretch my legs and reduce the risk of a dvt and put a wash on whilst doing it then not a problem!

I was in the office yesterday and at least 20 mins was spent gossiping (with 2 of the bosses - not about anyone in office, other people outside the company) so why wouldn’t I take 5 mins to put a wash on or clean the loo at home?

I’ve worked like a bandit today and feel like I’ve carpal tunnel as a result so they def get their pound of flesh!!

Disturbia81 · 12/02/2025 17:40

I have a job where I am deadline driven so as long as the work gets done for the deadline then I can use my time how I like. Constricting people in these kind or roles to specific hours will not get the best out of them.
I do my best work in the evenings when kids are asleep.
It's as usual a total lack of thinking outside of the box/understanding people work differently

Bubbleplumb · 12/02/2025 17:42

It is pure jealousy. I WFH. When my work is complete I can do what I want. As do the other members of my team and management. It isn't about "targets" We just keep on top of what comes in and nothing is overly time sensitive. I clean the house, keep on top of washing, go food shopping, gym, dog walking all in work hours without it effecting work. Management know and encourage us to make the most of down time. People on here are so catty about wfh it is hilarious.

Beyondhelp10 · 12/02/2025 17:43

I probably do a similar amount of non-work in the office as at home In the office, I’d be having coffee with pal-colleagues, extending lunches for yoga sessions, finishing early to go to the pub and (genuinely) nipping across the road for Botox. Now I whack on a load of washing when someone ‘gives me 5 minutes back’ because a meeting has finished early. Oh the glamour!

MarkWithaC · 12/02/2025 17:44

ginasevern · 12/02/2025 17:04

Can't remember ever working in an office where someone was pegging out the laundry, doing all their life admin, prepping their evening meal, looking after their toddler and all whilst doing a side hustle. Doesn't exactly equate to a 10 minute chat with a colleague in the tea room.

No one has said they look after their toddler or do a side hustle; you're making shit up.
I think we can safely assume too that, when people talk about going to the gym or for a walk, they're doing this for about the same amount of time as a lunch break from the office would be (it's certainly the case for me). And 'life admin', done in, say, two bursts of 15 minutes in between calls or whatever, equates to two 15-minute tea breaks, which is hardly unusual in an office.

I know you were being facetious with the comment about pegging out the laundry in an office, but someone has said pegging out the laundry while WFH takes them 7 minutes, less than your '10 minute chat with a colleague in the tea room'.

Corinthiana · 12/02/2025 17:44

I think it depends on the job, doesn't it? Some don't require full concentration.
There was a woman on another thread who said she changed her child's nappy while on work calls!
(could explain the shite advice I got from my insurance company, though..)

Flopsy145 · 12/02/2025 17:45

I think a lot of it is jealousy. Who wouldn't want that sort of set up.
My view is as long as targets being met on or before deadlines, do what you want with the rest of your time

Trainr · 12/02/2025 17:47

rwalker · 12/02/2025 16:12

Fail to see what’s funny if you paid a decorator to paint your house and they fuck off for the afternoon would you still be happy to to pay them for the afternoon

You pay a decorator to paint a room, not by the hour. They often leave early!! Or they say it will be three days and they do it in two. You pay the same price. Your analogy disproves your point and supports the OP’s point.

biscuitsandbooks · 12/02/2025 17:49

I reckon it's a mix of jealousy and ignorance.

I work for myself now, so set my own hours and pick my own clients, but when I worked on site, I often would take 10 minutes to chat with someone while making coffee, or I'd spend longer than necessary up in the office or the stock room just to get a breather. I'd volunteer to nip to the shops or the bank and go via another shop on my way to stretch the time out.

As long as the work is getting done, who has the energy to care that Jane hangs the washing out or Steve does the school run?

Mummadeze · 12/02/2025 17:52

I think it’s fine to take a short break to hang out your washing but what I don’t think is good is when people take a longer time off during working hours (eg to do an exercise class) because if you have to contact them urgently they are no where to be seen and it delays your work. Obviously this isn’t true of everyone’s set up but I come across it a lot. Eg I needed an answer about something urgently from one of my direct reports and I had to call him in the end because he didn’t respond to emails and he said ‘sorry, I was having tea in the garden with my wife’s parents’. It wasn’t a regular issue so I didn’t make a big deal out of it but I did think WTF.

Lovelydovey · 12/02/2025 17:52

I wfh 2 days a week. But they're often longer days reflecting that I'm not commuting so I don't see any issue with taking a few minutes to do personal tasks. Today I worked 7am to 5pm and the only real break I took was an hour when I took DS to the orthodontist and ate my lunch. I've still worked two hours unpaid overtime. I might also do a Pilates class on some days but I'm still working over what is contractually required, meeting my objectives and a break often focuses the mind.

ShapedLikeAPastry · 12/02/2025 17:55

The sad fact is that lots of people are stuck in shit jobs with few rights, and there are lots of jobsworth micromanagers about as well, who can't bear the thought of losing control of their minions, or who have fully gulped down the corporate koolaid.

Those of us in flexible WFH roles are usually more senior and / or highly qualified, doing jobs that require our specific skillset or experience. There's plenty that annoys me about my job, but I have worked long and hard to get to this level of autonomy. Damn right I'm going to hang the bloody washing out if I want to!

Corinthiana · 12/02/2025 17:56

Well, as long as the line manager is happy? I'm assuming it's all monitored. We've had some tales on these wfh threads, several women claiming they look after babies/toddlers, others that they do another job on the side? Who knows. It's up to the employer to sort them out.

ginasevern · 12/02/2025 17:57

MarkWithaC · 12/02/2025 17:44

No one has said they look after their toddler or do a side hustle; you're making shit up.
I think we can safely assume too that, when people talk about going to the gym or for a walk, they're doing this for about the same amount of time as a lunch break from the office would be (it's certainly the case for me). And 'life admin', done in, say, two bursts of 15 minutes in between calls or whatever, equates to two 15-minute tea breaks, which is hardly unusual in an office.

I know you were being facetious with the comment about pegging out the laundry in an office, but someone has said pegging out the laundry while WFH takes them 7 minutes, less than your '10 minute chat with a colleague in the tea room'.

I encourage you to read the OP properly before commenting. She clearly says she works on her side business. Another poster says she looks after her child. So I'm not "making shit up" as you so eloquently put it (may I call you Oscar Wilde?) And it might take only 7 minutes to peg out the laundry but the OP, along with many other posters, are not just doing that are they?

GoldenLegend · 12/02/2025 17:59

There are no absolutes in this. I am retired now but when I was working I HATED working from home. It was isolating and some things are always easier to sort out if you can speak to people face-to-face. I did work my hours, though, and was as productive as when I was in the office.

The people taking the piss are not always the ones you expect and not the ones that management would expect. I also knew of colleagues who worked from 9am until 7pm with 20 minutes for lunch and valued WFH because they got more done.

Ladysodor · 12/02/2025 17:59

Everyone should be back in the office by now. WFH allows you the casual lazy breaks that a day in the office wouldn’t allow. About time the Gov clamped down on this loophole.