To think children shouldn't be swearing in primary school

[Dishwashersaurous]

I'm genuinely interested in opinions and how this would be tackled in other schools.

There is a boy at my son's school who every single lunchtime will come and swear aggressively at my son. I understand he also does it to other children.

I've told my son to report to a teacher every single time, which he does.

However, it appears that there is no consequence or punishment for this child for the swearing. Then the next day the same thing happens again.

I intend to talk to the school about it because my son is now dreading breaktime and being sworn at.

However, Aibu to expect children not to swear at a primary school and that there should be action by the school to stop a child who does?

Highly inappropriate IMO and definitely shouldn’t be allowed, regardless of context or situation

I think that children should definitely be taught that there's a time and a place. That even if they hear swearing at home or use it with friends, that theres some words you can't use at school etc.

@Verlaine Swearing in front of children is not acceptable. I suspect DH swore at work, certainly on site, but it’s an inability to express feelings in coherent English - it’s not what I would expect a doctor to do in front of me for example. Or a teacher. So I don’t expect, or want, my dc around people who do this. A sweary atmosphere at work would be awful. I cannot imagine people I worked with in education ever doing this. It’s not snobby. It’s just a decent workplace where everyone’s comfortable. Ditto school.

Yeah we all swear but i bet you dont swear in front of your kids do you?

It doesn't have to be either/ or.

Schools should have no tolerance for any of that.

Doesn't it just...

Swearing in front of children is not acceptable

according to….you. Not me.

@CowboyJoanna all the time. I never swear AT them obviously, and I don’t swear in anger but I do swear a fair amount. I also teach them when and where it’s appropriate to swear and where it’s not. I think a playground of peers not overheard by a teacher is appropriate. Swearing aggressively or in anger at someone is never appropriate.

@TizerorFizz the snobby/ classist part was saying ‘professional parents’ would never stand for that, thus insinuating it was the ‘oiks’ who would

No one, pupil or teacher, should be swearing at any point, in any nursery or school.🤷‍♀️

It's definitely not polite but I was at primary school in the 90s and kids swore all the time, just not in front of their teachers or parents

If this was my child I would be focusing on the bullying side of it- intimidating my child by swearing at them aggressively.

@Verlaine I think you have not understood that some people would hate to work with others who are swearing all the time. Me for one but many many others would feel uncomfortable.

I know dh would swear along with the staff building bridges on site but I would tell him to stop anything like that at home. It’s definitely oik behaviour (your words). It’s a lack of English to accurately reflect feelings or a view. Some people DH was with swear every other word. It’s gross. Schools should not accept ir and neither should parents do it in dint of dc. Many people adjust their language according to who they are with, hence dh swearing on site. Not acceptable in the office. Or in schools.

It’s definitely oik behaviour (your words). It’s a lack of English to accurately reflect feelings or a view.

1. I’m afraid that hackneyed idea that those who swear have a narrower vocabulary has been not only disproved - but it’s been found to be the exact opposite. Link here but there’s hundreds if you have a google. https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/is-swearing-a-sign-of-a-limited-vocabulary
2. have you ever spent time with the proper ‘upper classes’, they swear like troopers!
3. I’d feel uncomfortable working alongside a grown adult who couldn’t deal with a valid word used to express a feeling, so the feeling is mutual.

My vocabulary is massive. Moreover, I can swear in four different languages. Swearing has a surprising number of benefits, if used in a targeted and sparing way: https://www.psychologytoday.com/intl/blog/hide-and-seek/201205/hell-yes-the-7-best-reasons-for-swearing

So as long as you aren't effing and jeffing with every other word, and we teach our children when bad language is and isn't appropriate, swearing is pretty good for you and we should all let go of our pearls a bit more.

Why is swearing about the person swearing? Surely though for those listening is paramount? Is it just me me me as usual? I hate dc swearing. Its lack of expressive words and certainly lack of respect for others.

Swearing is extremely expressive. It expresses anger and annoyance, and as mentioned in the link I posted (and in many other research journals) it has beneficial effects. It should absolutely be in context and never at people, but someone saying Fuck because they have stepped on a Lego and it hurts is not disrespectful. It helps that person cope with the pain better and expresses their frustration. This is not the same thing as someone getting in your face and swearing at you aggressively - that is verbal abuse. You need to learn to distinguish between the two.

That’s not applicable to playground swearing amongst dc and not what the op was talking about. It’s not expressive really. It is poor for dc to use this language instead of talking about their feelings. I think it’s you, @pointythings thats missing the point. The op was talking about aggressive swearing and I’m still firmly in the camp of no swearing at school. It’s hardly the same scenario as an adult treading on LEGO! They are utterly different scenarios. I’m assuming you don’t know anyone who swears every other word or you would understand why it’s not acceptable.

I agree with you re swearing at school, but anyone thinking that late primary age children in the good old days had never heard swear words or knew what they meant is just deluded. Bad language has always been with us and always will be.

As it happens I live in a very deprived town and frequently see parents swearing at their children with every other word. And that is abusive. Swearing in general with every other word is not to be encouraged. However, I do get very weary of people who see swearing as the root of all evil. There's a place for a well placed swear word to let off steam.

Hearing an odd swear word isn’t what is being talked about. Undoubtedly dc did hear this occasionally although I cannot recall this myself. I was not brought up in that world. Neither my friends. There were more local ways to express annoyance. Children can now hear swearing on tv and any other media outlet if they are not checked. They don’t filter when to use it and it becomes standard language. Once it becomes part of language, it’s used.

Why is swearing about the person listening. Surely though, the person speaking is paramount. Is it just me me me as usual?

Children can now hear swearing on tv and any other media outlet if they are not checked. They don’t filter when to use it and it becomes standard language. Once it becomes part of language, it’s used

That’s just the way language evolves. You do realise many words that used to be swear words are now considered not so. And of course, normal language changes meaning too - take the word gay. And new words are invented - like Rizz or Skibidi or Ohio popular amongst Gen A right now. There are no inherent meanings or connotations to words - they flex as humans change them.

There was a street in London called ‘grope-cunt lane’ back in the day. You’d have passed out with the horrors @TizerorFizz

it isn’t the roof of all evil but swearing isn’t acceptable in our home, DT’s school or my workplace.

My son got a fixed term exclusion for saying the f word once when he was in primary school.

So its ok amongst their peers? So for girls from non swearing families, they will hear misogynistic swear words for the first time in the school playground, why is that ok?

Sadly yes this is correct