Hairdressers. Why do you do it? Anyone else?

[theworriermum]

I don't know if it's all hairdressers or just my hair type (long, thick, coarse) but unless I'm absolutely prescriptive and borderline stern, they go to town.

Right now, I'm 4 months postpartum, heavier than I usually am and looking tired but my long brunette hair was my saving grace! I walked around with a birds nest in 4th Trimester to give it a break from heat. I straightened it before the cut for the first time and it was gorgeous and healthy. So long, long feathering across my jawline and neck.

I took my eye off the ball not saying 'trim only, no thinning, and please NO dramatic diagonal scissors for feathering'. I did say keep the length and that I liked the existing cut but it wasn't stern enough.

I couldn't see what she was doing at the back but it's clear to me now that she has thinned it without asking. A lot of them do this as I have thick hair but I hate it. At the front I asked for shorter parts to frame my face, which I already had but she has taken it way too far back, I look like a Shetland pony and the most infuriating part.... when she went to feather my hair, rather than trim the existing feathers she angled her scissors away from my face at a drastic angle and before I could say anything she slid them down. I asked her to stop but she said 'it's not even' and kept going, so now between the Shetland pony style side fringe, and OTT angle feathering, my actual hair only starts behind my shoulders. It's so ugly.

I'm devastated tbh. 2.5 weeks on and I still hate it. It's going to take months to grow this out. Last time this happened it took 10 months and I've been growing it and protecting it since.

Why? Why do you do it hairdressers? Anyone else?

I wouldn't mind the Edward scissors hands approach if they knew what they were doing. It's a shame the only person I trust to cut my hair is fully booked for weeks and I only know my window of free time a day or two before being mum of 2.

I have also had some awful experiences like this over the years. At least twice I’ve resorted to cutting a bob because the ridiculous layers and thinning looked so bad. Of course it then takes years to grow long again and I have to go through the cycle of trying to find a hairdresser who listens and cuts well. Drives me mad.

It's a scary business, I feel for you OP and hope it grows out more quickly than you think.

My worst events:

1. Caught the hairdresser combing down the top portion of hair suspiciously and asked what she was doing. "I'm just cutting you a fringe", "Nooooooo, STOP!!!"
2. Asked for a bob long at the front and short at the back, got a bob short at the front and long at the back. As with a PP by the time I'd caught on, it had to be made even. I remember sitting sadly saying "why did you do this?" and being cheerily told out looked nice. It did not.

Find a better hair stylist!

Oh lord this is why I haven't been to a hairdresser for 5 years, I don't know what it is about my hair that makes hairdressers think the thinning shears have to come out but every time they sneak them in. Is my hair extremely long, wavy and thick? Yes. Do I like it that way? Yes! Yet for some reason all they ever want to do is thin it, feather it, layer it and then iron it poker straight which looks awful on me.

It's kitchen scissors for me until I can find a stylist who will do what I want, not what they'd do if my hair was on their head.

My hairdresser of 20 plus years is brilliant,gets it right every time 😂

I'm going to a new hairdresser for a trim this Saturday and sort of wish I hadn't read this thread now! My old one was quite good but she put her prices up - £90 for a wash and cut and sometimes I was only in there for about 40 minutes. This new one is £30 cheaper but will I look like a Lego man afterwards??

Yes, it's funny isn't it, my hair looks better embracing the wavy texture and I even take photos to show this, quite bohemian looks I suppose and I still end up with straightened hair which I fluff up on leaving! I always make a joke about knowing that the photo is of a model but if the model has a similar face shape to me then that's the best likeness you can get when looking for hair images!

I can't bear going to the scissor happy fuckers!

I now get my DH to cut the bottom off my hair when it's wet and tie it up mostly.

I have only been able to find one stylist that can give me a good result because I have various cow licks and shizz going on. She has now retired. I started going to another and she had it just right and then kept cutting until I looked like the Mohicans had ridden through. I can't stand the mindlessness of it so I don't go anymore. They don't concentrate on what they are doing enough for me.

The moral of the story here is don’t let randoms cut your hair and get your appointments booked in advance. Childcare is the reason you’ve been hacked. I’d rather clip my hair back than let someone I don’t know cut/highlight my hair…

The prices are so high now that I always want my hairdresser to cut quite a bit off as my hair grows quickly and I can't afford a visit every three weeks but she's quite cautious about it, I'm not asking for a short back and sides but she does look like that's what I have asked for i.e looks shocked, when we discuss the inches off!

Am feeling your pain. I have curly hair. Despite all requests, photos etc, i have still been hit by the:

• triangle..when I specifically asked not for a triangle
• "Oh, it bounced up more than I thought" YES! I did warn you!

I still am astounded when I remember asking my stylist to dry my hair curly. Normally when I had it coloured I got it dried straight. Couldn't be faffed on this occasion, so asked her to just dry it curly. My hair is ringletty curly. Not just wavy.
She then blow dried it straight and put curls in with the straighners. That was it. I never went back.

https://www.lilyandjacks.co.uk

To be honest, it sounds like OP went for a dry trim seeing that she straightened her hair before the cut. I personally don't trust hairdressers who offer this service. You pay peanuts, you get monkeys.

It took me years to find a decent hairdresser that would just give me a dry trim and and tidy up and not leave me with unmanageable, ugly hair.
Sadly the salon closed during covid and I have no idea where she went.
I have gone to another salon and have worked my way through their ‘stylists’ with varying results.
I’ve settled on the one that causes least upset, only go twice a year and only have a dry trim.

Don't straighten your hair before you go! She needs to see your hair in its curly state as feathering is not good for curly hair. Maybe Google curly hairdressers need you

Hairdresser here.

Blame the piss poor education system!

Back in the 80’s, a hairdresser followed a proper apprenticeship programme (like they did with electricians and plumbers etc.) that took a minimum of 3-5yrs to complete and included working in a salon 4 days a week and day release at college. On successful completion you’d become a junior stylist. You had to work another few years before you could be promoted to Senior stylist.

Nowadays, you can do a 9 month level 2 college course and call yourself a qualified hairdresser with zero proper salon experience!

I completed my initial training via college and at a salon and then took advanced courses at the Sassoon Academy in London where I learnt so much more.

My advice is to NEVER choose the cheapest option in the salon as you’re likely to get someone with very little salon experience and more likely to be disappointed with the results.

I'd almost just about tiptoed up and coaxed myself into the idea of the necessity of a professional haircut - it's been 10 years - but this has reminded me of all the reasons I hate going 🤣.

I lost mine in handfuls thanks to Long Covid, more than half of it, and had to hack off the surviving length to match the regrowth, so there really is no discernible shape left. Plus, curls/crinkle.

So. nearly. there. 😆.

I have a mane of grey curly/wavy crazy hair. I grew the colour out during Covid, like many others. My hairdresser, who I’ve known for years and see socially as we share a hobby, hates my hair as it is now, thinks it’s “ageing” (I’m 61). He always tries to get me to let him colour it blonde, and always straightens it so I come out with a shoulder length straight bob. That style looks to me like every other older woman and isn’t me at all. I only go once a year now because I can’t bear it.

This is why I’m currently without a hairdresser. I went to the same one for years, decent salon, not cheap. I had really long hair and she couldn’t really go wrong with it. But then I wanted it cut into this popular blunt bob with a bit of a wave. She wouldn’t do it for 6 months then when I insisted she gave me an inverted bob, so short at the back. It was awful. I couldn’t wave it because it was far too short. I felt that she thought she knew my hair and how I deal with it better than me. Then I grew it out a bit and went to a second hairdresser, explained the whole situation and how nervous I was. She literally spoke to all her friends in the salon for the entire cut, didn’t say 2 words to me. At the end asked me if I wanted the wave like the photo. I agreed and she put tight curls in with a straightener. Horrific again. It’s now touching my shoulders and I just want to find a lovely hairdresser who’ll listen!

Oh op I’m really sorry, that’s rubbish. Lots of people say oh it’s ’only’ hair but it makes such a difference to your overall look and how you feel about yourself! Having had a few disastrous colours (not so much cuts as my hair is just as it grows, v thick and v long with a couple of inches snipped off the end and that seems fine to most hairdressers!) like when I wanted blonde highlights and got yellow hair with the same dark roots, or back to my natural colour of a fairly mid toned brunette and got deep dark red (I digress!) I found an amazing hairdresser. She was perfect, did everything exactly as I pictured it and wasn’t hideously expensive either. Then she developed an allergy to bleach 😭 awful for her but selfishly awful for me as I’m back to square one 🤦🏼‍♀️

Yes feel your pain. Also thick fluffy hair..sometimes it helps to bring a really specific photo. I also show them a photo of what my hair looks like not straightened Repeat endlessly ...blunt. no layers...no thinning scissors and don't take your eye off them. It's really frustrating.

Yeah this is why I haven’t been to the hairdressers since last year. I was actually quite happy with the last cut and don’t want to risk it again… I’m fairly sure if I went back to the same lady and asked for the same again it would still be cut completely differently.

I’ll never forget the time I went to Toni and Guy and checked the price like 3 times. The price was there on the booking. From the moment I sat in the chair she kept going on about how thick my hair is. On and on. When I went to pay, it was £20 more. I showed her the booking confirmation with the price on and she directed me to an asterisk which said in tiny writing they could adjust depending on hair thickness. I’ve never felt so scammed in all my life!

I feel your pain @theworriermum . It took me 38 years to find a hairdresser to work with my fine wavy hair. Then I moved tp Spain 🇪🇸. Researched hairdressers in the region, went by recommendations from FB and friends . Came out with a lovely cut . 8 weeks later, went for a trim and came out looking like a mushroom 🤷‍♀️.
Didnt have a haircut for 18 months until a friend said she had been to a new hairdresser who listened and would even speak to your former hairdresser.
She is amazing.

I currently have a great hairdresser. He's been in the industry for years. Before I found him I tried a couple of the chain hairdressers. Did a great cut but not what I asked for and didn't suit me.
When I mentioned this to my current hairdresser he said that the problem is that many of the chains have a set of styles that they cut and stylists get limited training outside the current trends.

I got so fed up with the mess and damage from not getting what I wanted and then the corrective works, that I shaved my mid back length hair off two years ago. It's now a tie back-able bob, and all my natural colour. Thinner than I thought, but I think the bleaching over their colour mishaps had frazzled it so much it gave the illusion of thickness until you got too close!