We have no bedroom and it's stressful

[Fishandchipsareyum]

Hello

We have a small 2 bedroom house and the girls each need a bedroom as they are both autistic and eldest is a pda and 7 years older than the youngest. The girls don't get on my eldest needs a lock on her door inside so her sister isn't allowed in. We are going to put a little latch on it for her.

We initially thought it was going to be ok, we bought an expensive sofa bed from ikea. It was hideous to sleep on so had to replace with a day bed that pulls out to a double but the sofa is in the way so it can't be moved to pull day bed out ( it's a tiny livingroom also) we have so much stress and we have no adult space and all my clothes are mostly in box's under the day bed. Husband sleeps on a mattress.

Guess I'm just wondering if anyone else has no adult bedroom because the children need a room each.

We can't afford to buy a bigger place. So we are stuck.

All that fits In the living room is the seating and the day bed ( single size pushed in) and a small unit for my things. Tv is on the inbuilt fireplace.

Youngest room is large but awkward so I'm not sure it could be split into 2. There is her bed and toys and books and I need to store towels and husbands clothes in her room.

I just can't help dread getting older in this place. I try and be positive but I feel quite down. I work 24/7 ( minus the sleeping tike lol) and I would have enjoyed a place to call my own bedroom for rest.

I shared a room with my brother who is 9 years younger than me until I was 18 I'm a girl. My mum.and Dad eventually got the loft converted once they could afford it. But overall it was fine abd we didn't know any different.

I also have a 7 year age gap between my 2. DD and DS (he was a massive surprise) we have 3 bedrooms but if we didn't they'd have to share until we could afford to move.

Hi , I've split a room with a window , butted the new dividing wall up against the window and covered it in the outside with a strip of uPVC.

I did change the window so both rooms had an opening window for ventilation/escape .

Managed to get the window off eBay.

Also think about having the kids single beds in a bunk bed type configuration, but one bed is "in" one room and vice versa.

Basically in one room the bed is the "top bunk" but no access to the lower bunk (that will be a stud wall) the other bed is the "lower bunk" but no access to the top bunk. The "beds" form part of the structure of the room.

I've done this is two ways for different rooms ,

one where each bed can be accessed from the side , as usual .

And one where , for space , the "bottom bunk" was accessed from the end , they crawled in , it was a "cave bed" , which my son actually loved !

Study beds are also a great space saver as well when a desk is needed , they aren't cheap but do come up on eBay.. .

What about getting a wardrobe, chest of draws etc for your stuff in the bigger room, at least it will all be a bit more away and organised so less stuff down stairs.

Have you seen where they split bedrooms using a bunk bed? Google it. Could that work in the biggest bedroom for the girls?

Would the other bedroom be easier to split? Get a professional in who could give you some ideas on how to split one of the rooms.

PDA!!!any ideas...I'm flummoxed at the constant initials!!! Is it just me??? Why can't the threads just say instead of abbreviations I don't get????

@elliottsmum67 Pathological Demand Avoidance, considered a form of autism or a feature of some children's autism. If you Google PDA and Autism you'll find out all about it.

Yes, it's just you.

Calm down.

My guess is OP can not afford to pay for a professional to give advice on splitting a room.
OP you could draw out the room with measurements and window and ask for advice on how to split the room?

could you get a caravan and put it on the driveway?

Pathological demand avoidance. Part of her autism diagnosis. I'd not heard of it until the day she was diagnosed.

Guess I'm gonna have to Google the abbreviation including R.U.D.E....thanks for your sarcasm....

My brother has 4 kids and lives in a,3 bedroom house, 2 of the kids shared a bedroom as they are twin, the oldest boy is 10 years old and the middle girl is 7 years old than the twins and they are both teenagers so they have their own room. Like yourself the parents sleeps in the sitting room, what they did is they bought a mezzanine bed (very confortable) which allows them to have a sofa under. Example as a picture, the one they have is pine which is lovely as match their furniture type

I’m guessing that the op wasn’t planning on having two kids with disabilities and how this would impact on her family budget.
What a stupid fucking comment.
OP- could you perhaps get a grant for an extension from the OT given the needs of your children? Or use a high sleeper in the front room with your couch and storage under it? Ikea do good versions of this

Apologies my post won't post if there is a picture or a link. Google mezzanine bed or loft bed, it could be something to consider.

ok.

if you partitioned the large room so there was room for a single bed in the smaller side how much window would the other room have.? would there be light and an opening window?

If not, if you partitioned the window to windowsill height down the middle, but then created a 'step' into the larger side just below the window that allowed the child in the smaller room to have a bed with a foot which went into the jut out area, and the larger room had a shelf there (like some houses have in a room at the top of a staircase) would either child be upset by that?

Elder child uses the room the adults use now. Adults use older child's room. Kitchen area to live in as best you can for now. Will be tight I suppose, but achieves separation and a room for you. Then board attic space for storage in time.

Have you seen these? Google 'bunk bed room dividers', sorry can't work out link! It uses a bunk bed with walls each side to break a room up.

I know this is going to blow people's mind but it's quite common in Europe to have smaller flats where there is a pullout couch in the living room either for kids or adults. I started my life in a studio flat with my parents. They had an double bed (ottoman so plenty of storage) tucked away in alcove and I had a pull out sofa bed. It wasn't until I was 11 when we moved to a flat with an extra room.
My friend has two kids and "three room flat" - which is two bed, basically. Kids have a room each (one is disabled) and they sleep on a pullout couch in the living room. They share their youngest child's wardrobe. Growing up I never knew anyone who had flats big enough for everyone to have a bedroom so it was pretty universal that either parents or a child sleep on a pullout couch in the living room.
So, bearing that in mind, I think the priority is to find space for your clothes because when you are asleep, you are not aware of whether you are in a living room or your bedroom. It's the rest of the stuff that stresses you out.

https://pin.it/3x8Qcz0iT

I had rooms that would only accommodate "slightly" shorter beds , custom mattresses , just 15cm shorter were soooo expensive, so I took a standard mattress , unpicked the end , pulled back the layers of foam etc and got my local garage to angle grind the main metal to le.gth, removed the unwanted springs and then folded the fabric back over and stitched shut.

I sleep on one of these every night , I'm 5ft 4 ,

Could the living room be split into a bedroom and lounge?

Also , could you split the room but the smaller room has a ladder up the wall to the top of the room and the loft is opened above , just the bed is "in " the loft, and the bed sits above the ceiling of the next door room.

Christ on a bike, building regs exist for a reason. What if there was actually a fire in that house?