If you’re vegetarian but DH isn’t, do you cook him meat?

[pinkhollydolly]

I’ve been vege since I was a child. DH isn’t and there is nothing I can do or say to persuade him that dinner doesn’t need meet.
I will put chicken kievs, and the like in the oven, and even pan fry a steak, but anything more that I just don’t like labouring over a hot stove and my hair smelling of meat when I don’t like it. So it’s basically ready made meals, anything I can put in the oven and he doesn’t like it (married 10 years, DC won’t eat meat, and DH works and I don’t so by agreement I do all the cooking).

YABU- if you’ve both agreed that you’ll do the cooking, cook him what he wants.

YANBU - you shouldn’t have to cook things you don’t like the taste or smell of, I wouldn’t.

My husband was veggie and I would never have asked or wanted him to cook meat.

I then went veggie and 20 years on the idea of chopping meat now really bothers me.

So my view is, if you don't like it, don't do it.

I used to love meat and now I honestly couldn't put it in my mouth if you paid me, my mouth is recoiling at the thought. Unless you don't eat meat, you can't get how repulsive it is to some people.

I don't see the issue with cooking meat. If I'm cooking a meal I make sure everyone is included, not just the lowest common demoninator or this month's particular fad.

If he's that bothered....people who work can still cook? Especially an infrequent batch cook.

@bluegreen89 what are you on about? No one said it was a must or expected, I simply said it was refreshing - from my point of view. No one must conform to anything, each has an individual choice. I am allowed my perspective and ironically you are a prime example of what I was getting at. Get off your high horse.

Never cook DH meat. I find meat really gross and don't want to touch/smell it at all.
He tends to add meat to whatever I've made.

That entire thread is full of people who either refuse to cook meat for their partner, or live with someone who won't cook them meat. They are brain far far less rigid!

I'm vegan and wouldn't have a meat-eating partner, thus avoiding the issue!

If you agreed to cook his stuff and now find that problematic, you need to either renegotiate or put up with it, unless it's enough of an issue to end the relationship.

yes i’ve cooked meat dishes for my non vege husband and one daughter. But as i don’t taste it when I'm cooking it i have no idea if it tastes good- so he prefers to cook the meat himself most of the time 🙂

Pretty much the same as you OP.

Will happily stick some nuggets in or even grill a burger or whatever but I don’t want to actually have to prepare it.

i wouldn't tolerate this. i love meat, and i want to eat it whenever i want including in my own home.

If my DH was a veggie he'd have to cook for himself, i can't remember the last time i had a dinner without meat.

Hi OP

I think YANBU but….

I can understand his POV if you have continued to cook “his” meals during your marriage because that was your agreement.

If you were thinking of returning to work, I would be making a new agreement!

As a compromise, can you cook quite “samey “ meals of pork/beef/lamb chops and chicken done in roasting bags that he opens himself and puts on the plate?

Would that limit the smell getting into your hair/clothes but still provide your DH with the meat that is so essential to him?

I’m a vegetarian too, but have cooked for relatives - once in a blue moon!

I think YABU. My husband is a meat eater and I am not. I cook him meat. It's my choice, not his, to be veggie so I will cater to his needs and in return he's very respectful of mine (making sure when we go to parties and stuff there's something I can eat, making sure if we go to his friends for dinner they're aware etc etc). I will say I'm a life long veggie so not great at cooking it but he doesn't complain.

He's great for being happy to just eat veggie food though, as well. Does not complain at all - he's just there for the taste, not necessarily whether it's meaty or not!

Yes, I do. And for the kids too. I worked in a meat factory for a while when I was saving up for uni, I served all manner of meat and fish based meals as a waitress, as long as I do not have to eat it I don't mind what anyone else does and I'm fine cooking it. If it bothered me that much I wouldn't have married a meat eater!

My son's partner is vegan, my son is not but he shops and cooks for her and now eats a lot of vegan stuff that he wouldn't have done otherwise so he doesn't always have to cook two different meals. Luckily he is a good cook. She never cooks.
I think she's incredibly lucky to have found someone so accommodating.

I've been vegetarian over 40 years and have no idea how to cook meat or fish, neither will I handle it or wash up a pan with juices or blood in it. I'll make salad, veg etc and DH cooks his own meat or fish to go with it. He almost never eats a meal without it.

I feel theres something quite entitled about the comments on here.

If a veggie came to my house for dinner id be expected to cook them something veggie. But if i went to theirs theyd reguse to have meat in the house?

Ur veggie so want ur husband to eat veggie as u do the cooking. If he was doing all thr cooking and only cooked meals with meat would that be ok? It wouldnt.

It feels veggies want everyone to accommodate their food preferences.

No, I don’t. If he wants meat or fish he cooks it himself. We’re both fine with that.
Most of the time we have vegetarian meals together and he’s fine with that too. He probably has fish or meat once every 1 or 2 weeks.

I’m veggie, DH and both DS aren’t. I’d say 2-3 meals a week are meat, the rest vegetarian but that’s through a combination of choice (lots of veggie pasta dishes etc) and trying to reduce our meat consumption as a household. However, I do cook them meat - it isn’t their choice that I’m vegetarian and as I do all the cooking and work part time compared to their full time, I don’t feel it’s fair for them to start cooking when they get home.

I think YANBU

I’ve been vegetarian since birth as my parents are vegetarian, and I’ve brought my daughter up the same, obviously putting a lot of research into her diet as a child. She’s now an adult and still vegetarian and it’s an important part of who we are. However my husband has always eaten meat/fish but was very supportive when I said I wanted to bring her up veggie like I had been. At home he’s also happy to eat our veggie food 80% of the time for ease. I don’t expect him to cook my veggie food and if he had wanted meat/fish for every meal, we’d have just cooked separately every night. However if he cooks meat for himself that’s obviously fine, but he wouldn’t expect me to cook it for him, and personally I wouldn’t do it as it’s quite revolting to someone who’s never eaten it. Also, I’d probably end up giving him food poisoning as I don’t have a clue how to cook meat/fish and didn’t even see it prepared in my childhood home.

Those who eat meat don't need to eat meat at every meal
Those who don't eat meat, never eat meat and rarely want to cook it

Surely it's fairly obvious? Veggies are against meat, meat eaters aren't against eating veggie food and eat veggie food anyway.

I’m a life long veggie. However, partner eats meat and children being raised as meat eaters. We do 50/50 cooking and both cook mixture of meat and veggie. I do wonder if we spoke to the partners of those saying my husband loves veggie food whether they would voice a differing opinion.

They would surely cook more meat themselves then, or bring it up? I think in this modern age there’s so many different foods, from so many different cultures, people have a much more sophisticated palate than the old fashioned meat and two veg of our grandparents era. Even meat eaters eat a lot of veggie food by choice now, my husband often chooses veggie when we eat out, and it’s definitely not because of me, as I respect his choice to eat it if he wants to.

I imagine they are happy to eat veggie at home if it doesn't involve them having to cook.

I cook meat for my whole family and I am vegetarian. I do not taste it, so have to be careful with seasoning.

I accept eating meat is a choice, just like I do not choose to.

I do all the cooking, DP hates it, I'm veggie so we eat veggie. He eats meat when out instead and manages fine. Occasionally if it's a special occasion or I'm cooking for a crowd I'll cook meat, but he isn't bothered enough for me to do it more than that.

I'd tell your DH he can do the cooking if he's that arsed. Although I'd also find someone who can't conceive of a meal without meat in it incredibly childish.