Annoyed at being told to drive safe

[Tillybud81]

So I've got a male freind who I've only known a few months, we message a bit but nothing more than freinds. I've just been away on a bit of a trip in my car to visit family and he's sent messages telling me to drive safe, asking if I've arrived safely, telling me about the state of the roads, etc. He checked in asking if I had a nice day, and if I was ok, I messaged him to say I had a lovely time visiting my family and I'm heading back now, all he said was 'drive safe please'

Now I don't know if he's a worrier (doesn't seem to be in person), or if he's just being nice but it's starting to grate on me. I hate being told to 'drive safe' or 'be safe' as if I'm just driving around like a lunatic all the time. My mum has always said similar to me whenever I went out, but thats different, mums worry. Plus I've known this man all of 5 minutes really, it just seems OTT

Anyway does if grate on anyone else being told to be careful/safe when just goin about normal daily life?

Yeah, YABVU. People just say this to be nice. Be safe/look after yourself/ watch out for crazy drivers/text me when you're back!

No underhanded misogyny as you are implying @Tillybud81

Fat as a walrus! 😂 Made me LOL that did!

I was going to say this!

He's into you and this is his clumsy way of showing it.

@FrannyScraps "Fuck,.you can't say anything now without folk getting offended"

Well, you can, actually. Loads and loads of things.

Top dollar unreasonable behaviour from you OP.

It's just a kindly phrase, like saying "have a safe flight".

I drive a lot for work, and DH always says drive safely. I do the same when he has a long drove.

It's caring and thoughtful.

I always say it, absolutely nothing to do with driving ability, it's just one of lifes niceties

When my DP is going on a long drive I always say "please don't die."

We think that's funny.

If it were just the one, as a sign-off, then I'd agree with other posters

... but the fact that he's sent several messages about safety, road conditions etc suggests to me that he thinks OP is in particular need of them. More than he is.

And why would that be?

It's just a phrase. Like sleep tight or have fun. Just an expression of good will, not an instruction.
Now it does sound like he is maybe trying to more involved/closer in your life than you want, but that's a separate issus

Ok not sure where people have the offence thing from, I didn't say I was offended by it! And certainly don't feel it's a man V woman/misogyny thing (people really will see that anywhere won't they) Just irritated that it was literally the only thing he said to me when I'd responded to him about my nice time with my family.

Just drive safe please! Then followed-up by have you made it safely back? He's not actually asked me anything about my time away.

If it was a message followed by have a safe journey back it wouldn't be half as bad IMO. I don't think I've quite conveyed the amount of times he's said to be safe, drive safe, are you Ok?

It's obviously just me then

YANBU He sounds a bit over the top.

And I’d be more annoyed by the shit grammar - it’s drive safeLY ffs.

If it were just one message, YABU
BUT multiple messages? YANBU

Christ on a bike. I say this to people all the time. I best check I am not unwittingly pissing off those I care about

From a DP or DH yes it is, from a man I barely know though?

I know someone, not a very close friend, any time we say goodbye he will tell us to "ride safe"

It's just something people say, not offensive or annoying to me

Perfectly normal thing to say, my husband works away and I say it to him every time he leaves.

Maybe you should have a friend who's doesn't GAF!

My female friends say this to me. They are just hoping I get home safe don't over think it.

I totally get that its just polite small talk but the facetious side of me wants to reply "No i won't, il drive like a maniac 😂".

Its like when DC aren't well and people always say "Just keep an eye on them" duh no shit sherlock that's generally what we do all day every day 😂.

See drive safe is term of endearment. See also take care go safe

It's the please at the end of his message that id be annoyed about. Like it's condescending somehow

It’s just a nice thing to say.

you are massively overthinking this

As others have said, I don’t see the problem either.
I would say it, the same way as if someone was flying somewhere etc and I would say ‘have a safe flight’, it’s just something people say.
There is no offence intended in it. I would only understand your viewpoint if he worded it as ‘try not to crash!’ - only then would he be implying he thinks you are a shit driver!

I think of you took away all these little phrases and social niceities we wouldn't be saying much, they make up a lot of our interactions and it's lovely.
Even just "take care", the mortally offended would have something to say about that

As a tangent I was in a shop where the shop assistant was telling me all about her upcoming exam, as I left I said “good luck with your exam” and she gave me the most filthy offended look! So even “good luck “ seems to be offensive to some!