To think that wolf whistling wasn't such a bad thing?

[NovemberMorn]

Joanna Lumley has just given an interview in which she says..."I never minded wolf whistling, I always thought it was tremendous".

She also said... "I think we were a little bit tougher then. Somebody put their hand on your leg, you didn’t feel affronted and report it. You’d give them a slap.”

Do you think she is right?

So true @meh2025 I remember my mother, born in 1915, talking about how awful the street harassment was when she was young, especially when she was pregnant. Apparently many men felt the need to single out pregnant women for harassment and to make vile lewd comments, as they had obviously had sex. 🙄

Oh yuck, there is no end to the grossness of predators :(

They are extreme cases, grew up in Ireland in the 80s and 90s and the most that hsppened was like I said a few guys on a building site giving you a whistle as you walked past, I don't remember ever anyone shouting and harassing myself or my friends on the streets, didn't happen any of us, it sounds mental, and an awful place to live. Having said that I'm be more nervous as a 50 year old going through the city centre now, it's definitely not a safe place.. I don't even like my teenage daughters going into the city centre, thankfully they prefer to shop and socialise locally, I find it sad the way Dublin has gone, and so do the majority of people living here.

I am sorry this happened to you tootsie 💐

By anno domini, I meant to do with how long ago we are talking. I am not saying she is right but I think she is judging by what she knew in the 60s when the only trauma you heard about was when you bumped your head - apart from soldiers, of course.

This is incorrect. Women still talked about how gross and awful this stuff was, and always have. They were just mocked and told to shut up about it even more than they are now.

You see that's exactly why oldies feel youngsters are thin skinned. Some daft banter on an internet site is hardly bullying. Bullying is when someone's heart even body is bludgeoned. If we can't agree to differ without being unpleasant, there's no point in wanting to know others' points of view.

Reminder - women have historically always hated street harassment. Your grandmothers and great grandmothers hated it too.

But I am sure there were always some women who enjoyed strange men making weird noises at them in the street, who spent a lot of energy trying to minimise how frightening and digusting predatory male behaviour is for so many of us.

There were women who tried to stop the Suffragettes gaining the vote, after all.

I'm so sorry. I remember how sometimes it made me feel really self conscious about how I was walking. One occasion for some reason stands out, though it was really nothing compared to a lot of things men did to me.

I was going to school in my flat moccasins and kept thinking I would trip when they started the street harassment from a scaffold I had to walk past. My legs felt weird and wobbly and I felt such shame and was just trying to walk normally and keep my face straight and not get upset.

From that day on for many months, I took a longer and far less convenient route to school.

Just one tiny thing out of all of them, but I am astonished that anyone would ever try to minimise making a schoolgirl feel like that for no reason or positive advantage at all. Literally, all they had to do was shut their traps, do their job and let me exist and go about my business.

But arguably the nasty tactics come from those who can't accept that some of us didn't really give it a moment's thought.
We don't deny that their experiences sound absolutely horrendous. Of course asking a 12 year old to spread their legs is absolutely vile as well as criminal.
However they cannot accept that this didn't happen to us. We are talking about the odd whistle but followed by a "mornin darlin" . This was not harrassment and was just a bit of banter.
What I object to is that some people on this thread are being really quite offensive, implying that we lack self esteem, enjoy having strangers make "weird noises" to us and now, that we would be anti suffrage (wtf)
When I pointed out that I knew that the builders were not whistling children (due to the location) they turned it on its head and said that it was only due to lack of opportunity. That's a vile accusation to make!
They just cannot bear someone having a different experience from them and yes, their sometimes vicious and always snidey comments are a form of bullying/online aggression.

Nah.

The OP asked if street harassment was fine and quoted, bizarrely, Ms Lumley who implied that those who detested it were weak.

People responded to that. The answer is - no it's not fine and no we're not weak.

And people stating those facts doesn't prevent you from enjoying strange men making weird noises at you, or ignoring it, or whatever.

It seems you feel we are poor feminists for not really being much affected by cat calls or wolf whistle.

It's a shame you feel that way, I haven't got that vibe from people responding at all. I don't think of myself as a poor feminist and I hope you wouldn't think that way of me either if we met.

There's room for more than one way of experiencing our lives, I see your way and agree it's best for it to stop. It adds nothing. It's not necessary.

It's a shame that we keep getting negatively judged for our different experiences.

Nothing you have said is relevant to anything I said. I am not a feminist and couldn't care less if you call yourself a feminist.

As I have stated clearly and repeatedly, the OP asked if street harassment is fine and implied women and children who loathe it are weak.

The response overwhelmingly is nope street harassment is disgusting and we are not weak for thinking so.

Naturally I will not allow anyone to minimise and dimiss the genuine distress street harassment has caused many thousands of women and children.

As I clearly stated there were women "who spent a lot of energy trying to minimise how frightening and digusting predatory male behaviour is for so many of us. There were women who tried to stop the Suffragettes gaining the vote, after all."

If you are not spending a lot of energy trying to minimise how frightening and disgusting predatory male behaviour is for all of us you were very clearly ot being discussed in the same context as women who tried to stop the Suffragettes getting the vote.

So if you are not spending a lot of energy trying to minimise how frightening and disgusting predatory male behaviour is for all of us you can just move on and allow other women to discuss their experiences, and continue to enjoy strange men making weird noises at you, or ignoring it, or whatever.

OK, really aggressive response there so I guess you're not interested in discussing further. Ok.

I don't remember anyone saying they enjoyed it barr one or two, the rest, like myself didn't give it a minutes thought, we didnt experience any of what some of you did and yet we are being called sad etc, you simply can't change our mind on something we experienced, I'm speaking from my experience, regarding do I think it should continue now, obviously no, but didn't bother myself or my friends back in the day, sorry if you don't want to hear that. My daughter has to walk past an ipas centre on the way to school and lots of males 18 onwards hanging around outside and calling her out, she can't understand what they're saying but herself and her friends are very uncomfortable and now walk a different way, there was a meeting in the school to discuss this and they were told to take the long way around to the school, dont think school will take it any furthet, fear of being called racist but yes it's more frightening now when when i was a teenager in Dublin but you probably don't want to hear that.

I haven't seen anyone call anyone names for enjoying or being uncaring about strange men making weird noises at you.

I haven't seen anybody trying to change your mind.

I have seen plenty of women saying they had extremely distressing experiences who absolutely refuse to have that minimised and I have seen the majority reply to the OPs question with a resounding NO, street harassment was not ok and no we are not weak for loathing it.

Feel free to carry on enjoying strange men making weird noises at you, or the memory of it, or not caring about it or whatever.

Meanwhile, the women who were asked if they find street harassment ok and have overwhelmingly responded no they didn't can continue to keep supporting one another for their upsetting experiences.

No, it was in no way an aggressive response, but as there is nothing further to discuss because I covered everything, all good.

Cheers for the laugh react fairycakes, not sure if you think it's funny that women and children have had distressing and disgusting experiences, or that you find it funny that you don't have an adequate response, but thanks anyway. 😆

Because you're like a broken record saying the same thing over and over so all I can do is laugh 😘 don't engage with me anymore if you don't mind, just use the cut and paste from your other posts, save you typing same thing over and over xx

Ah, so it was the second - no adequate response.

Good to know, and good to know you will stop engaging with me now 😘

Ah, im glad to see you now have copied the laughing emoji onto my post, it's a great little tool isn't it😘

Didn't you say you were going to stop engaging with me?

No problem if you want to keep responding but it doesn't seem you have anything to add? 😘

I like having the last word😘

Well, if you have anything relevant to add, feel free to do so. 😘

But you actually tried to defend these men, who apparently you never heard street harassing children, by saying they didn’t have the opportunity too as none were available to street harass, because no children were around. You know in your “get the scene” post, You actually sounded like they were choosing not too, whilst saying they just couldn’t.

Why are you going so far to discredit people who have said that these men are indiscriminate in their street harassment? Not that they should ever have been street harassing anyone. I mean who the bloody hell do they think they are.