Breastfeeding and MN. Why so different to IRL?

[Gogogo12345]

I had read many many threads on here about the " restrictions" of breastfeeding. This morning is a child free wedding that the OP will apparently be EBF an 8 week old. This is a common theme. All these EBF babies.

Yet in real life there are only about half of babies that are still BF ( even partly)at all by 6-8 weeks
And only 1% EBF at six months

So why does it seem about99% of mumsnet babies are exclusively breastfed for months on end?

You know I never understood this as bottle feeding costs money. I’m not saying all bottle fed mums are poor but maybe social stigma?

I'd say at least 75% of the mums I knew BF until at least 6 months, maybe 40% to at least 12 months, 5-10% beyond that. Those who bottle fed tended to have decided beforehand and didn't try to BF. A few also combination fed. This was over 15 years ago, very mixed area.

That would ring true for my friendship group to be fair.

Yabu OP. All my friends and ante-natal group breastfed longterm.

@MissScarletInTheBallroom yes, absolutely. I also had a lot of support from my DH and my family. My mum and my mother in law both breastfed (MIL breastfed 4 kids!!).

When we came home from hospital, DH would do every waking with me and help me position the baby (he had a tense neck and couldn't latch properly on one side plus I had had a c section and was struggling a lot physically)

My mum had warned me how hard it is. She says she breastfed me because of a really nice midwife who helped her out a lot. She still remembers the midwife's name and she calls her an angel, that's how much of a difference she made!

So I was mentally prepped that 1) it's hard and 2) outside help is needed.

Yes, exactly.
Where I’m from (in Ireland), the rates are extremely low. I know hardly anyone who has bf and the ones who have haven’t ebf and certainly not beyond a few months. I ebf my dc for six months then kept bf til nearly three years old. The whole reason I joined mn was because it kept coming up when I googled information about bf.

Luckily cost wasn’t an issue for us when I decided to formula feed from day one.

I’ve no idea how others fed their babies - wasn’t in their houses to see!

How would one health visitor know that the research figures were incorrect?

Sometimes the bride and groom actively want to accommodate babes in arms, though. My husband and I have been invited to a wedding in a few weeks. The invitation didn’t include names or indicate whether it was child free, so my husband texted the groom to check. We were told it was child free so my husband confirmed that he would attend on his own, as our baby will only be 8 weeks old and is exclusively breastfed. Groom then replied to say they would actually be happy to have our baby attend since she’s so small, and they would rather have us both there with the baby. So we’re leaving our older child with grandparents and going with the baby, at the bride and groom’s request.

No it is a generalisation but studies have shown demographically well educated middle class women are more likely to breatfeed than those from poorer socioeconomic backgrounds.

I love it when I’m the opposite of a ‘trend’ or ‘study’!

Yeah studies show a majority not every single person. It’s the trend to discuss not individual experience.

I bf both of mine for 18 months. The first was exclusively bf and the second I bf at home and expressed for the childminder when I was at work.

I was prepared to stop at 12 months withy youngest because I went away for the week without her but I was amazed it hadn't interrrupted my supply at all and I just picked up where I left off when I got back!

I've known women who only ever ff, one of those was my exsil who said she never considered bf until she saw me doing it because none of her friends had. I've known others who bf for longer and others who did for various lengths of time. And others who did mixed feeding.

That's my real life experience.

Fair enough. I'm not in England, I'm in Scotland. I don't know about NHS Scotland policy, only what my health visitor told me.

Then she misled you I'm afraid.
The Public Health Scotland Infant Feeding report also specifically states that for their purposes breastfeeding includes feeding expressed breast milk. In fact they also, rather sensibly, differentiate between "always exclusively breastfed" and "currently exclusively breastfed" so that in the sort of circumstances already alluded to on this thread, such as a baby that got one bottle of formula in hospital but has had only breastmilk since then, would still be included in the currently exclusively breastfed category.

Take it down a notch. Seriously.

You may feel offended (which is your right) but it doesn’t mean what the poster said was offensive. Which btw it wasn’t.

Your over reaction would suggest your potential guilt (?) and if not that then your over need to justify your choice which not everyone would agree with because you chose not to.

I could care less what you did because hey your baby was fed and it was your decision.

If we are being pedantic, how dare you insinuate that breastfeeding mothers need their partners to do so, or let it affect their mental health or wouldn’t be comfortable in public? This is your personal experience and valid to you but others can have opinions on you ‘not being asked’’. Any of the fears I had or uncomfortable feelings about breastfeeding were VERY secondary to doing the best for my baby.

Your reaction was interesting as you set out to justify how you already a great mother (and I don’t question this) but made rhe whole thing about you.

Again you do you and thats perfectly fine but your offence is personal and in justifying it you have said offensive things in return.

It is offensive and incorrect to post that someone who formula feeds doesn’t care for their baby as much as someone who breast feeds. How you feed your baby doesn’t determine your love for your baby.

I believe I said that so not sure what your post is saying.

I literally don’t feel an ounce of guilt for formula feeding my babies. i did what was best for us all.
I didn’t insinuate that breast feeding mothers don’t need their partners because I’m absolutely sure they do. But the poster I quoted said that mothers who breastfeed care about their children more than those who don’t, which is completely incorrect and as I mentioned in my original comment, could tip a mother who is struggling and formula feeding over the edge. I’m so glad I hadn’t found Mumsnet when I had my first child and had pnd because I’m certain ignorant comments like the post which I quoted would seriously affected me.

No I didn’t need mine, so again let’s not generalise. It’s a personal experience. Just because it isn’t your experience doesn’t make it wrong and that’s my point.

I see ignorant comments both ways. I see ignorance both ways. I see offence both ways. It doesn’t make them ignorant or offensive.

So do you think in some circumstances mothers who formula feed are less caring parents than those that don’t?

Clearly everyone's real life is different. Lots of women EBF to six months and beyond. Only a couple of my friends bottle fed and that wasn't through choice.

Who cares? You do you.

I‘m sure I read that the stats for EBF being 1% at 6 months don’t include anyone that has started weaning. Given NHS advice to start weaning around 6 months and plenty of people go sooner it’s not surprising the figures are so low.

Why comment then 😂 anyway I’m going to sleep now ready to wake up for another day of not caring for my children