Breastfeeding and MN. Why so different to IRL?

[Gogogo12345]

I had read many many threads on here about the " restrictions" of breastfeeding. This morning is a child free wedding that the OP will apparently be EBF an 8 week old. This is a common theme. All these EBF babies.

Yet in real life there are only about half of babies that are still BF ( even partly)at all by 6-8 weeks
And only 1% EBF at six months

So why does it seem about99% of mumsnet babies are exclusively breastfed for months on end?

You don't have to ask everyone on earth/in a country/county/area in order to come up with stats. That's now how it works...a sample is used, from which wider stats are extrapolated.

This. And the very important point is that a lot of work goes into ensuring that the sample is representative of the population as a whole.

Once you are aware of this, it becomes blindingly obvious how different the MN demographic is to the general population. It's fascinating from a statistical point of view.

This is awful - maybe I was lucky, my cousin was still on maternity leave and suggested I go along but it had also been brought up by our HV as DD was quite slow to regain her birth weight. I remember turning up every Tuesday like a zombie during those cluster feeding days, and the only thing that kept me going was support/reassurance that the phase was completely normal and would stop eventually.

The only resistance I got was probably from DH who was worried about me taking it all on myself (but he made up by being in charge of nappy changes) and MIL who visited during the cluster feeding days and accused me of hogging my baby.

I would never judge anyone for FF (I'm a FF baby!), I just know I would personally struggle keeping on top of the bottles.

But I was also one of the lucky ones - never found it particularly painful (after quickly discovering Lansinoh!), never had supply issues/mastitis or disruptive illness (me or DD).

I don't believe class or education comes into it really (peer pressure yes). Whatever happens, will happen as long as it is the best decision for mum and baby. And that's all that matters.

It is demographic and often age related.

In my 'home town' (fairly deprived) a lot of my peers had kids young. One had 3 before I finished my A levels. Not a single one breastfed. I was pregnant at the same time as a neighbours teenage daughter, she bottle fed. I do remember a couple saying they didn't want to ruin their boobs.

I exclusively breastfed, most of my friends I've made as an adult breastfeed. At health visitor group workshops I would say at 4 months it was 25% had some breastfeeding, 75% were entirely formula. By the 10 month one only 2 of us were still breastfeeding.

It's often that you see a skewed percentage. At NCT classes that preach natural birth no interventions etc - they attract people that already want to breastfeed. When you go to events that have a wider demographic e.g. those health visitor workshops that simply invite everyone in a given area that had a baby in X window that you see it. But even then there is local and cultural variations.

I and the vast majority of mum's I know breast fed until at least 6 months. Probably half of us kept feeding until 18 mths/2 ye. Think nit depends where you are.

I went to three local toddler groups and I was the only mum breastfeeding. But of all of the other mums I know from work and hobbies, I don't know anyone who formula fed.

I'm not sure whether the figures about breastfeeding rates are accurate. Maybe it's very demographic dependent but most mothers I know EBF their babies for at least 6 months.

Even if the figures are accurate, the proportion of babies who are formula fed at 8-10 weeks old will include babies whose mothers wanted to breastfeed them but were unable to do so, or ended up quitting early on.

Most mothers contemplating a child free wedding when their baby is 8-10 weeks old are still pregnant when the question arises. Unless they are planning to formula feed from the outset, it's impossible to say at that stage whether they will be able to leave their baby with a sitter to go to a wedding or not.

I breastfed both my children (am still breastfeeding my two year old) so not speaking from experience here, but I imagine that many or even most mothers who formula feed their babies still wouldn't want to leave them to go to a wedding at that age.

The general view on Mumsnet (which I agree with) is that babes in arms should be an exception to a child free wedding rule, which is why many posters will have a long list of reasons why a new mother shouldn't be expected to leave her tiny baby with a sitter. But breastfeeding is the most compelling reason, in the sense that if your baby doesn't bottle feed, you just can't leave them for any length of time.

I didn't know anyone in my circle who bottle fed. We all EBF our babies. It wasn't commented on, it was just what we did.

Mumsnet is a bubble of better educated women among whom rates of breastfeeding are much higher.

I may have missed it but where are the figures from? I have found the 1% figure being repeated in 2023 but the original source appears to be the 2010 UNICEF survey. The 1% figure seems right for 2010 when weaning was generally started earlier than 6 months old.

As others have said, it depends on demographics. I did my NCT in a very affluent area of London. All 10 us were educated to at least degree level and comfortably off. All but one breastfed and the lady that ended up formula feeding had wanted to breastfeed.

Of my wider friendship group (similar demographic) all but one breastfed.

1%? Most of the mums I know from ante and post natal group (run by the council) breastfed as long as possible until they went back to work. Definitely six months or as near as possible. A few combi fed.
I though BF was less restrictive in a lot of ways! Though I BF my DD for a year she was eating food from about five months.
A child free wedding is child free. Declining because you are BF is fine; insisting on bringing a baby is not.

In my experience, parents who bottle feed are usually happier having family/friends look after their babies quite young so they can go out and carry on with life as it was pre baby. Breastfeeding mothers don't quite get the same freedom so would need to take their child most places with them especially whilst young. The types of threads would be different.

Sounds like a lot of Mners are very interested in how other people feed their babies. Outside my immediate family I couldn’t tell you who breast fed and who used formula. You can’t tell from looking at the children.

Yes, the 1% is quite extreme as many people will have done a top-up with formula at some point. 34% still having some breast milk at 6 months is higher than I expected.

My sisters and friends had all BF, but all of them advised me that there was no harm in doing a formula top-up if needed. I imagine a lot of people do this.

As other people have mentioned @Gogogo12345 , demographics will play a part in this. People who BF may turn online for support when FF is much more straightforward. MN skews towards middle-class/ higher incomes, which I believe correlates with higher BF rates.

Anecdotally, I noticed that at the NCT baby group I attended, most mums were BF (and lived in the nicer areas of town so I’m assuming higher incomes), while the group at my local Sure Start centre (in the less nice part of town where I live) were mostly FF. I had planned to BF but couldn’t get on with it, so FF, and felt slightly self-conscious at the NCT group.

Why should you feel self conscious though? You are still feeding your baby. That's the important thing

It doesn't kind of make sense though. Formula is expensive so surely if you have less income it's an expense you could do without

Breastfeeding rates vary greatly by the education level of the mother and whether their mother breastfed.

So it's probably about Mumsnet demographics.

I don't know anyone who BF but it's not the done thing in my culture.

Potentially there's a correlation between caring enough to breastfeed and caring enough to be searching out parenting advice online

No there isn't. Find a research report that says people who breastfeed care more about their babies? You won't find one.

What a horrible comment. Breastfeeding is higher among educated women and it also has to do with family history & culture. It's a complex subject and the rates won't be increased with nasty attitudes like that.

@Gogogo12345

It doesn't kind of make sense though. Formula is expensive so surely if you have less income it's an expense you could do without

That's a simplistic way to look at it. Breastfeeding consists of front loaded work and often expenses- it's a heavy workload at the start so you need the headspace to do it. I am a mother with a good job and no money worries and a supportive DH so it was a lot easier for me to do this work at the beginning than someone under stress. There can also be expenses at the beginning with private lactation consultants /pumps ... many bfing journeys start off bumpy.

You also need to be convinced of those benefits so you have the motivation- that's where family history and culture comes into it. If you don't know anyone who was breastfed and you were not yourself then it's not really clear why you would do it.

What a stupid and incorrect comment. Breastfeeding doesn’t mean you care more, are better educated or can research!

Breastfeeding doesn’t make you a better mother .

Haven't RTFT but to partly answer your question... some babies are recorded incorrectly IMHO.
I EBF my kids to 6 months and then carried on bf whilst weaning to 12 months. But DC3 was marked by the health visitor as mixed feeding, because she had 1ml of formula at hospital when she was born. 1 single millilitre of formula is enough to classify a baby as non-EBF! So no wonder so few mums manage it.

EBF also does not include any expressed milk, so if even once you tried expressing and bottle feeding, your baby is no longer EBF.

It's an incredibly tight set of stipulations to qualify!

I don't agree with most of the post you've quoted but there is a link between breastfeeding and education levels.

I have a 1st class degree, a Masters and three years further post grad qualifications. I am also married to a Doctor. I am more than capable of research and made a positive decision to use formula.

As stated in PPs the EBFing part is misleading. I know plenty of women who were still partly feeding at 1 year who would not have been classes as EBF at even 6 weeks. One small bottle of formula is all it takes to no longer be in the EBFing stats. I think the stats are around 35pc who are breastfeeding at some level at the 6 month mark. That still seems very low compared to what I have experienced but I am an older mother in a reasonably affluent area.