To not replace the bottle of wine?

[foreveralmost]

I live with two other housemates, one stored a bottle of wine in side door of the fridge. As I opened the fridge it fell out and smashed.

I didn’t open the fridge roughly, I opened it normally, She saw me do it. I obviously cleaned it up and apologised - but I was just the unlucky one who happened to open the fridge.

She has now text me to say could I pick her up a new bottle on the way home ..

I wouldnt expect my flatmate to pay for it if i saw it was an accident. Same like when my friend wanted to her phone in my bag when we were both drunk in pub. Obviously been drunk dropped my bag down some stairs 🤣 smashed the phone. My friend said it was an accident didnt expect me to replace it as it was her who chose to put it in unsafe place.

I realise I am making an example of you here but there are many, many more people who say things like this and it confuses me.

Why would having a small problem like this mean that it is 'all (the hypothetical) OP has to worry about'?
It could be, of course but alternatively, it could be that there are a lot of far, far bigger things going on and something like this is just pushing them over the edge? Or that the OP's life is very difficult and having one more little thing to do is the last straw?

Again, using this post as an example, just something I notice on MN a lot and never understand.

Because the OP’s quarrelsome manner and snippy responses on here suggest she’s not someone massively stressed by ongoing life situations and for whom this was the last straw in a difficult week, or the victim of a pattern of bullying by the wine-owning housemate, just someone difficult looking for the internet to pile on and agree her housemate was unreasonable and that whoever’s fault it is, she’s not replacing the wine?

I mean, I don’t think it’s that mysterious.

People seem to be confusing fault and responsibility.

If you were sitting on the other side of the room when the door opened and the wine fell out, you are neither at fault nor responsible.

If you opened the door and the wine fell out you are not at fault but you are responsible. The person who left it in an unsafe place is not responsible but is at fault.

Whether the person who is just responsible should pay up depends on how daft it was for the person at fault to have acted like that in the first place. Just crammed in, unbalanced, unsupported, so it was an accident waiting to happen, they should pay themself. Left securely, they should share the cost.