Scrutinise my day and help me become more energised!

[MrsMurphyIWish]

46, on HRT, low BMI, good diet.

Typical day:

Alarm: 4.30 for hour of exercise
6: breakfast and get kids up
7.15 leave house to drop DS at breakfast club and off to work
5: pick up DS from club, go home and eat dinner
6-7: marking whilst cooking dinner for next day
7-8: bed time for DS (autistic so needs a structured bedtime)

DH does breakfast club/after school on his day off (other days he leaves and gets back too late and takes DD to her extra curricular).

Saturdays is housework, marking and making sure kids do homework. Also fixtures for DD.

Sunday is crying in a dark room 😂

I’m pretty sure it’s menopause related but have been on HRT for over a year.

Any advice or is this a life of a menopausal woman with a pre- teen and teen?

I will come back to thread but have parent evening later so hopefully can check some responses beforehand!

What time are you going to bed if you get up at 4.30?

8pm. I go to bed after DS goes down so I typically have 7 hours.

It’ll be less tonight as wont be home til 8.30 but typically I go to bed at 8.

Getting up at 430 would kill me…

How low is your BMI, and can you describe your "good diet"?

Must be about 20/21? I’m 5’ 7” and 9 stone 3.

Breakfast: cereal Lunch: something and salad sandwich Dinner: something and vegetables Snacks are oranges and apples. I drink too much coffee - must have 6 mugs a day but I’m a teacher, it’s a staple 😂

I’ve always found that waking up that early, even if I go to bed super early, is more exhausting than going to bed an hour later and waking an hour later.

I’d try moving your exercise to 8PM then going to bed at 9PM and getting up at 05:30/05:45. I did that (I used to be up at 04:15) and it’s been a total game-changer for me in terms of energy!

That sounds like a slog. How much fun stuff do you do? With or without kids?

Could you do exercise at lunch at all so you didn't have to get up so early?

Do you have a lie in on a weekend or still up at 4.30?

Do you have to exercise for an hour? I’d be tempted to half the exercise time to have you an extra 1/2 hour in bed. How old are your DC, if primary age homework of no benefit so I’d take a more lackisdasival approach to that. You say marking so assume you’re a teacher? Any new marking strategies on the horizon - lots of my teacher friends only mark assessments now and the rest of the time they give verbal feedback or feedback whilst tasks are done.

Outsourcing/making dinner easier? We both work FT and we have a couple of easy nights meal wise - one night is always beans on toast night (or a jacket potato) , and we have pizzas (just supermarket) every Friday.

Are you going too long between food ?

What about a protein snack ? Drink plenty of water.

I agree , the 4:30 wake ups are odd. Sometimes sleep is more beneficial to well being than exercise.

How much water are you having as well as the coffee? If you're having as much coffee as you say you are, you're probably having a caffeine crash and that's not helpful. I gave up coffee recently and I feel tonnes better.

Worth doing bloods too and make sure you're not lacking anything.

You also need a protein based snack and maybe move your wake up to 5am and do 45 mins of exercise instead.

I exercise in the evening and I’m about the same (7 lb heavier), I’m full of energy. If I exercise in the AM I’m tired by 3.30pm.

That routine would kill me. You are getting up really early, doing a demanding job and looking after a young child. I know you said you go to bed at 8 but it sounds intense. Also, like pp said, where is time for relaxation? I don’t think you need to get up so early if kids are in bed until 6. My only other advice is to do less marking. Difficult I know - I’d be interested to know your schools marking policy as most places are moving to less marking.

Err this. That's far too early. You can't be asking us this question and then telling us you are tired. Go easier on yourself. Exercise a few times a week and eat better food if you don't already. Enjoy your evenings a bit more.

Totally agree.

Your early mornings would kill me and you're just doing too much. Is it an option to move to a four day week to get on top of housework and have your weekends free for more fun/relaxation time?

Yup it's the getting up at 4:30 and if you're marking in the evening then I guess you're teaching in the day? Also knackering.

Lots of questions - and good advice! Will try and answer quickly as trying to get ready for work.

I have to exercise everyday as I have a disability so my exercise is part physio. Can’t exercise at lunchtime as work in a school (35 minutes for lunch if I’m able to get it).

Hardly drink water apart form when exercising - maybe not as healthy as I think!

Interesting to hear that exercise in evening has helped. I’ve always been an “early bird” so just seemed logical to get up an hour earlier - I seem to switch off in evenings. Even when I was younger!

”Fun times” are had in the holidays 😂 Sunday we try to do something as a family though but I’m getting so tired.

Just to add - this typical day has been like this since having kids and DD is 13. It’s only been this year when I’ve felt exhausted and I need to do something as have another 22 years of work left!

How old are your children?

13 and 10. Might be a bit easier next year when DS is Yr 7 but he does have autism. We haven’t had school refusal yet - and I will worry about that that happens!

It doesn't look like you have much downtime in the day if you are going to bed at 8pm. Do you have time for a bath, reading, or even just mindless TV? Obviously teaching, I'm guessing, will also involve no downtime during the day? It's not just physical exertion, the mind needs to be able to slow down during the day, exercise at 4.30 doesn't count as 'me time ' imo, so when are you just chilling?

Try swapping one of your coffees for matcha? Provides more of a steady energy rather than a high followed by an energy dip/crash.

I'm exhausted looking at that to be honest. You get up at 4.30, you work full time long hours in a notoriously full on and exhausting job, you have kids including one with a disability and you have a health condition yourself. I'm amazed it's taken this long for you to run out of energy.

Is there any scope for you to drop a day at work?

Is there any scope for you to drop a day or 2 of early starts?

Are you eating enough really? Is your low BMI and your something and salad something and veg diet the same as it's always been or have you been losing weight?

My SIL recommended this last night - thanks!

A few suggestions from me (that I am also trying to help with similar issues, so tbc if they work!):

• Batch cook so you have min 3 easy meals mid week. Then do exercise whilst meal is being reheated rather than getting up so early.
• Get outside for a walk once a day, even if only 10 minutes. More for the daylight than the exercise.
• Drink water.
• Can you afford a cleaner? Even just every other week for a couple of hours? Helps reduce admin load on the weekend.
• Try to shift more household admin to during the week, so the weekends are true family time (only works if not getting up so early….)

I'd love to know what your DHs routine looks like too. Does he get any downtime? Is he also doing his fair share of cooking, housework, childcare?

Have you had any blood tests? I was similar and had very low serum ferritin. Been on iron tablets for a while and finally feel much better.