Scrutinise my day and help me become more energised!

[MrsMurphyIWish]

46, on HRT, low BMI, good diet.

Typical day:

Alarm: 4.30 for hour of exercise
6: breakfast and get kids up
7.15 leave house to drop DS at breakfast club and off to work
5: pick up DS from club, go home and eat dinner
6-7: marking whilst cooking dinner for next day
7-8: bed time for DS (autistic so needs a structured bedtime)

DH does breakfast club/after school on his day off (other days he leaves and gets back too late and takes DD to her extra curricular).

Saturdays is housework, marking and making sure kids do homework. Also fixtures for DD.

Sunday is crying in a dark room 😂

I’m pretty sure it’s menopause related but have been on HRT for over a year.

Any advice or is this a life of a menopausal woman with a pre- teen and teen?

I will come back to thread but have parent evening later so hopefully can check some responses beforehand!

You’re a teacher, nuff said!

I’m similar, teaching, two kids, one with ASD. Exhausted.

If you can't change your day timings then you need to look at what you are eating and drinking. I would suggest switching your cereal for a protein based breakfast and add in a few snacks where you can in the day. Nuts would be good unless your school bans them due to allergies. You also need to drink a lot more water to keep you hydrated.

You need to try and carve out some time for yourself (easier said than done, I know) I know, from personal experience, that what you're doing now is unsustainable. I started to make changes a year ago and I feel so much better. Here's what I did -

• Acupuncture

This has been the most positive thing to happen to my mental and physical health.

• Supplements

I found Lions Mane gives me energy well into the evening when I'd usually crash around 4/5pm. Try British Supplements, they don't add any crap.

• Meditation

Try and take 10mins, and few times a week, to just sit in silence. No fancy poses or chanting, just sit or lay in silence and try and clear your mind.

• Diet

I learned to cook (my food was always oven stuff previously). I found Gousto to be really helpful.

• Track your period

Quite amazing really how little I knew about this. I always take it easy the week before I'm due cause I know my body and mind isn't as it's best.

There are various other things as well, but these are my main positive influences. I am a different person from a year ago. I am calmer, less irritated, much happier, I have more energy, and I naturally lost weight.

I wish you all the best.

Bloody hell, woman. People think I do a lot (work FT, 2 primary DC, just finished a STEM master's, wedge in a social life occasionally) but your day is gruelling. I take my hat off to you.

I know how it feels to get stuck in the coffee crash loop, but I would definitely try and get off that and cut coffee down quite a bit. Perhaps swap some of your later cups for decaf and/or green tea and work from there. And I do wonder if the same schedule might be more manageable if you switched your exercise to the evening and tweaked the timings somewhat. And I would definitely minimise marking, outsource housework and make sure your H is doing his share. But that you manage that at all is a real achievement.

What time does your husband go to bed & when do you socialise or see friends? Where is the joy?

Hi OP. Your wake up time and exercise isn't odd at all. I do the same, although this morning had to force myself out of bed at 5.10, my alarm goes off at 4.45 daily and even at the weekends it's off at 5 for me to walk the dogs.

I am a morning person, I can barely make dinner by 6pm let alone exercise. And I've tried the switch too.

I also work in a school, not a teacher, but I appreciate the pace of the day.

I've found I am much more energetic if I don't eat a big evening meal. So I eat something at 5pm when I get home, usually avo toast with salmon. Then I'm done until breakfast when I get to school in the morning.

Instead of coffee I have a square of very very dark chocolate periodically through the day which I find gives me more energy.

Agree with PP who says ditch the caffeine. Buy an aeropress and make proper decaf at school - the jar decaf is shit and full of chemicals.

Ditch the cereal at breakfast, make overnight oats, or cook some boiled eggs and take a tub of egg, avo and salmon and have at school while your coffee is being made.

Or a pot of kefir quark with blueberries and bananas and a small handful of nut, it will keep you full for ages.

Appreciate going to the loo is hard when you are teaching but increase your water. And make sure you are using vaginal oestrogen so your bladder is stronger! Mine is much better these days for Estriol cream.

Also can you catnap in the car at lunchtime? This gives me a lot more energy for the rest of the day. Or a 20min power walk if you are not supervising break time?

Have a lie in. Honestly. It will make all the difference. I am similar stats to o you. I get up at 6.45. Coffee and do kids breakfast. Walk kids to school and walk back. Breakfast (Toast with eggs or banana or peanut butter or porridge), Log on and work. Lunch ( soup or sandwich or salad) more work, walk to pick kids and walk back, another hour or so at work, ferry to kids clubs, balanced tea and then unwind. I could fit in exercise in my lunch break or after tea and probably should but I do walk a lot and prefer downtime ( which exercise is for some people but not me!). I don't snack much and eat in a 10 hour window generally and this maintains weight.

I’m a teacher too. I work 4 days which is a godsend. Any option for that? Other things that people have already mentioned- water (this is huge!), more protein, carbs first thing isn’t great, daylight (huge for me - is it worse in the winter?), cleaner?

You are a f/t teacher, with disabled children and no help at home. It’s a lot! Try and buy in some help, lower your standards! Now I’m perimenopausal I need more daylight and can’t be rushing around or I get anxious. Luckily my kids are adults so my home life is less stressful.

Good luck OP.

I know this isn't really what your thread is about, but my advice?...QUIT TEACHING!

Life-changer. Best thing I ever did.

Old age in NOT kicking in! I’m 53 OP, I sit down about 30 mins before bed, run 40km a week, work full time running my own business, have 2DC, Pilates every morning, and 2 classes a week in term time. I cook from scratch every day as no UPF, make my own bread, blah blah etc. I am full of energy. I don’t having caring responsibilities.

Low iron has been suggested up thread and I bet that’s it.

Jesus how does anyone get up at 4:30!? That's a strange time to get up. Even 5:30 would be considered very early!

I think you need more rest for sure. I can't imagine getting up that early, doing 60 mins of exercise then doing the school run. I think you need to consider going part time so your day is shorter, and can't you get up at 5/5:15 instead and do 30 mins exercise. You're slim anyway..

You get up too early, drink too much coffee and don't eat enough/the right food to fuel a busy life. It's no wonder you're knackered.

Gosh, I'm exhausted reading that.

• Definitely drink more water, it's had a massive impact on my energy levels. Embarrassingly so, to be honest! I would also suggest SLOWLY reducing cups of coffee to maybe 3-4 a day?
• 4.30 wakeup then at 6 you wake the kids, can I ask why it's 1.5 hours - is that allowing half an hour to scream into a pillow by any chance, as you are a teacher 😆could you reduce this to 45 minutes maybe? Otherwise yes, I'd maybe suggest experimenting for a couple of weeks of exercising before bed, see how you get on? It would be a bit of a change for your body as you say you are an early bird, so you'd definitely need to stick it out a couple of weeks before binning it off if it doesn't work, but worth the experiment maybe?
• cereal for breakfast and then salad immediately jumped out at me! Exercising in the morning, plus on your feet all day - id say you need some more protein early on and maybe more carbs, depending on what your evening meal is consisting of/what works for you. You could do overnight oats, or overnight weetabix with Greek yoghurt - both can be prepped the night before.

Sorry to be repetitive but:

a) don’t get up at 4.30am! Madness!
b) reduce your coffees. I read that relying on coffee actually makes you more tired. I thought that was crap, but gradually cut out all my coffee (swapped it for tea) and it honestly worked. Try it.
c) take some Vitamin D
d) eat more protein and healthy fats along with your carbs (ignore the ‘carbs are evil’ articles)
e) have some general blood tests to ensure you’re not anaemic or low in folate or have thyroid issues, etc.

Getting up at 4.30am is brutal. Exercise in the evening might be better

OP just come back on to say I know lots of people who get up as early as you and it is not abnormal. If I don't exercise before I start my day I'm like a slug for the rest of the day.

I even did a power walk before surgery last year. I honestly feel much worse without the exercise, it is weights or yoga or power walking or pilates classes online.

Keep the exercise.

No wonder you don't feel energised if you are waking up at 4.30, sounds awful. I am not sure what time you go to bed but even if you go to bed at 9, it still sounds awful waking up in what is still nearly the middle of the night.

I think the problem is we try to do too much and fit too many things in our day, but sometimes is just not possible. In my opinion, exercising is good, but I doubt it is that good if you are missing sleep and have to wake up at 4:30 to do it!

You should have some time to do nice things and socialise even if it is not very often. Can you have a cleaner onece a week so you don't have to spend your Saturday cleaning?

It’s a symptom of the crazy hamster wheel of life that we’ve all accepted, with little to no time for rest, reflection, fun, outside interests and hobbies and being peaceful and contemplative.

Collectively, we’ve been trained to accept productivity as a benchmark of a responsible and effective life, but where’s the meaning, the joy, the pleasure and satisfaction?

What do you do just for you? Why not try and find a hobby that gets you out of the house. It will be difficult to begin with to find the time/ energy but it may be a fake it until you make it situation

Going to bed at 8pm, spending no time with DH or your friends, doing nothing but exercise parenting and work will make you feel horrific. You have no light in your life. It's all hard work.

Perhaps try doing exercises on alternate days and see how long you’d naturally sleep to gauge if you need an extra hour or two.

The early bedtime means you’re not getting any wind down time after your children go to bed too.

As suggest a blood test is worth it. Our hormones etc are changing a lot in our 40s. I felt ready to quit my job a few months ago and live on benefits because I was struggling so much. Went to doctor and got diagnosed with high blood pressure and low iron levels. Medication for both and feeling myself again. Luckily I checked the warning signs before I quit lol.

Lots of coffee can make you more tired not less because of the caffeine drops through the day. Water is better. Perhaps alternate.

I have been a teacher. There’s zero way I could juggle full time teaching with 2 kids (one with special needs) and a DH without a flexible schedule, do exercise and cook and still have a energised attitude!!

your ‘lack of energy’ is simply the result of having so much to do and doing it!

It’s the 4:30 wake up, especially in winter. This must be disrupting your circadian rhythm. Doesn’t matter what time you go to bed.

You don’t have a menopausal problem, you have a getting up at 4:30 problem.

" I don’t having caring responsibilities."

That's why then.