Childminder and holidays

[FandyRenoli]

Name changed for this as don't want me or childminder to be identifiable. It's long so buckle in!

LO is 1 year old (just) and started with the childminder in September. I'm a single parent, no wider family childcare support. The childminder is new to childminding but does have extensive experience in the childcare industry and excellent qualifications and references. She is married with primary school aged children. LO started with her the week she opened. Childcare is in extremely short supply in our area and I was very happy to find someone so good.

I should start by saying that the childminder (CM) is lovely and the care she provides for LO is amazing. On that front I'd recommend her to anyone.

When we went to look around she said most of the bookings she had were wrap around school care so for most of the day it's LO and one other. At that point I checked that she isn't term-time only as this just wouldn't work for me. She assured me she wasn't and said she would close between Christmas and New year, had two weeks holiday booked in the summer, and might take "the odd day here and there" for a long weekend away or similar, but would give plenty of notice plus bank holidays. All good.

At Christmas she was actually closed from 20th December to 6th January (so not just between Christmas and New year) but we managed.

At Christmas she also sent out a list of the dates she would be closed in 2025. This came to 40 days plus 8 days bank holidays. I really wasn't expecting anywhere near this many- it's nearly double my annual leave allowance and there is absolutely no way I will be given that number of extra unpaid days even if I could afford them (which I can't).

The pattern is also very focused on school holidays. She will be closed either the entire half term or the majority of it for all three half terms - February, May and October - plus a week at Easter, a couple of weeks in the summer and all of the Christmas school holidays.

I will absolutely not get annual leave now for February as this was booked up by other staff months ago, and May and October are key times in my industry where annual leave is only approved in emergencies - one of the reasons I checked CM wasn't term time only.

I messaged CM (politely) about this pointing out I'd checked she wasn't term-time only and that I just couldn't get this amount or pattern of time off.

She replied that she isn't term time only (though by my calculations she's shut for 70% of the school holidays), that she's entitled to annual leave (I agree) and that this is the usual amount of time off for a year round childminder (I'm not sure about that one).

So am I being unreasonable to be surprised/taken aback by this amount pattern of leave, and by the limited notice for leave in February?

What are other people's experiences of this?

Would I be unreasonable to expect some level of compromise from her to resolve this?

My childminder shuts 2weeks (ish, sometimes less than 2weeks) for xmas, and has one week in june and one week in sept. She doesnt open for bank hols. So she has 4weeks plus bank hols

This really. Can you find a nursery?

You being a single parent isn't relevant here to her either

I would expect the usual 24 plus BH

40 is a lot!!

OP I can sympathise because I also live in an area with heavily oversubscribed childcare, but you keep saying ALL other nurseries and childminders are full - but how do you know? Are you telling me you’ve called every single nursery and childminder in a reasonable distance? Even when they’re all full, somewhere normally has space. I say this as a mother of 3 who has ALWAYS managed to find somewhere. You just need to properly sit down and look.

Staying with the current CM clearly isn’t an option so go find somewhere else

Did you sign a contract? My childminder was term time only (I’m a teacher so fine with me) but if ever she was sick or her children were sick she could offer a childminder in her network. I never used this but many childminders have a network of friends who can provide this cover for each other. Is there someone she knows who works all year? Alternatively, you could find a nursery or a nanny.

Unfortunately, sympathising with you here is not going to solve your childcare problem. I would start looking for an alternative and regarding February, if you cannot find childcare you will have to take leave from work, what else can you do if you have no alternative to care for your child. I would feedback to the child minder regarding the impact, however, she has given notice of her leave, perhaps with the next provider ask for longer notice for their close down / leave dates.

Obviously it’s not ideal for you but she can choose to run her business however she wants.
she should have been clearer upfront but if it doesn’t work for you then you need to find another solution.

The childminder may well have taken these dates for a reason. Just because she’s a childminder it doesn’t mean she’s at the beck and call of her clients. OP needs all day care for the majority of the year, so really needs to put her child down for a day nursery. I find it hard to believe she has absolutely no one who could step in!

It's unfair as it's not what she told you. Did your contract state holiday entitlement? When I was a childminder I took 5 weeks a year, two at summer one at Xmas and Easter and a floating 5 days ( for odd days needed)

You need to find alternative childcare asap. If you haven't sorted t for feb your only option would be to phone in sick

It's frustrating she wasn't open and honest about it when you first enquired, you can't force her to open though. I'd get onto every waiting list possible in the area and as a PP said ask if she knows anyone in her network who can offer holiday care in the meantime.

Whilst this is of course true, saying you're not term time only and then taking well over half of the school holidays off isn't fair. Being open and honest is all it takes and then it's not an issue.

Can you take the baby to work? or work in with a co-worker who has children? Ask around your workplace if there are any known options you could utilize.
Can you take unpaid leave?
Are there any good (experienced and trusted by neighbours) babysitters. Older teens or SAH Mums or Grandmothers in your neighbourhood who would like the infrequent work.
It's very difficult for you.

Also you could speak to other childminders to see if they can cover some of her holidays. They might not have a permanent position but might be willing to do adhoc cover so u have a back up.

Ex CM and friend of plenty of current CMS. Your contract should specify the maximum no of days she can have for annual leave in the year - ie, 20 or 25 days over the year. Sorry, but the number of days she is taking would be unacceptable for any business unless you have agreed she has 40days/8 weeks annual leave at the start.

I’m afraid you will need to find an alternative CM/setting. She is in a business, providing a service that enables you to work within your contractual obligations (ie you need a CM who takes a similar amount of holiday to what you are entitled to with your employer) with just the occasional time when you/DP or a family member have to step in my prior arrangement because CM’s sick leave or the off leave day clashes.

1. I would ask if current CM could consider doing any dates in FEb half term as a one off as your struggling to get this sorted. If you don’t ask you don’t get.
2. Not ideal but can you work from home for any dates in Feb half term, LO will just have to watch a lot of telly. You could maybe flex your hours to work more once they are in bed?
3. Longterm you need a different childcare provider, pop names on nursery lists. I would also ask if they can ad hoc cover Feb half term. I would expect annual no but again worth asking.

Your CM should have provided dates she’s closing when you asked, I would be annoyed too. She can set her own dates it’s her business but more transparency was needed around school holiday's.

It’s tricky because the childminder is self employed and sets her own rules!

However I do believe she should be clear in her contract about how much leave she will take. Have you checked what it says in the contract?

when I was a childminder I was really upfront that I worked mainly term time only but would have some days where in the holidays where I was available. I didn’t charge if I wasn’t available.This meant I got mainly teachers and this suited me fine.

does the childminder have any childminder contacts that she could give you that would be able to cover her holidays? They may some term time only contracts and could squeeze you in for the holidays?
Don’t lose an otherwise excellent childminder over this!

YANBU but she’s not going to compromise by the sounds of things! I would look for a nursery asap. We used a childminder for a while but switched for just this reason. I think especially when you don’t have a back up nursery is safer. What would you do if your childminder was sick for example?

Are you in a job where you can work from home?

If so I’d plan to work from home those three weeks and look for a local teenage babysitter who can come to your house and look after her whilst you’re working. There’s less of an issue with trusting/experience if you’re in the house. Or join a gym with childcare and work from the gym. Or if you don’t have lots of meetings spend the day with her just checking emails and then work after bedtime. None of which are perfect!

If you can’t work from home you’re going to need to leave it until the last minute before the February one and then tell them your childcare has fallen through and be absent. After 15 years they won’t sack you but it’s not ideal!

Id book as many of the other weeks off work as possible now, using parental leave if needed, so it’s just the three weeks you have to cover as an emergency.

Id also pop my name onto waiting lists for nurseries you like and plan to change as soon as possible.

Can you take the baby to work? what a ridiculous question. No employer is going to be OK with that!!

OP when my dd was a baby I initially had it in my head that we needed a childminder. I thought they'd be warmer with my dd and have a more 'home from home' feel. I thought the cm I chose was lovely at first. However, when my dd started settling in sessions it became obvious that she was really jaded and uninterested. She and other members of staff rolling their eyes at my perfectly fine baby because heaven forbid she was a bit upset on her first couple of days. Telling me I'd 'have trouble with her as a teenager' because they couldn't deal with even a bit of fussiness. In addition to this there were constant messages on the family app that clearly showed she was fed up of doing this eg 'I'm fed up of toys being broken. I won't be replacing broken toys any more' and 'If you want your child not to be in a nappy they need to be able to go to the toilet independently and pull their clothes up or down. We won't be assisting them' After I turned up to my daughter waiting at their door packed up ready to go and bored (even though I was 15 minutes early) and absolutely howling after just her 3rd settling in session and the cm rolling her eyes at me and making zero effort to comfort her I knew it wasn't right and removed her. I put her in a nursery instead. They were lovely. My dd settled in there very quickly and came on leaps and bounds. Btw the childminder only a year later was graded as inadequate by Ofsted

It sounds like your cm has been very disingenuous about her annual leave and is taking a disproportionate amount of a/l. I'd personally take this a red flag that your cm's heart isn't really in this any more and make alternative arrangements before other standards start to slip. I wouldn't discount a good nursery though. I found our's to be very warm and affectionate towards my dd, much more engaged with the early years curriculum and overall much more professional. In addition to my experience above I've gotten to know a few of the cm's in my area. They're a very cliquey bunch and one cm especially is good on paper but literally hires all her mates to work for her, none of who I'd trust to look after my plants never mind my kid. Nurseries are much more regulated and the right ones should provide excellent and reliable care.

My daughter went to a lovely childminders but we have the same issue - long holidays and not flexible. We also had to pay 50% fees whilst they were off. Also if they are off sick or their children are off they have to take additional time off. It was just a logistical nightmare.
Whilst our childminders were wonderful, for this reason I would always recommend a nursery.
I don't think there's anything you can about the leave I would get your DC down on as many waiting lists as possible and explore other options for feb half term - I.e nanny's and holidays clubs.

I have this issue OP yanbu mine is also taking on average 38 days a year plus bank holidays also si gle parent no support. Its rubbish but as they are essentially self employed they can take any amount of a/leave they want although I am starting to think financially how that works as we pay them when on annual leave surely we would pay what would be considered as standard annual leave allowance for example if full time isn't that 28 days. Its sh*t to be in this situation but I dont think much we can do. Mine is also taking time off in February luckily not on school holidays but taking more days off than my annual leave allows and the same prolonged Xmas dates. Wondering if same person does the name begin with c?

I’m an ex-Childminder and I’m usually very Team Childminder in posts relating to disputes with childcare providers. However I’m totally on your side with this one. She has been unreasonable here. I don’t think you get use of the words “a few days here and there” could be misunderstood, it definitely doesn’t mean half of all school holidays.

Do you have a written and signed contract? I had very clear notes on holiday that I and my clients took. What does yours say?

She’s allowed to take as much holiday as she likes, she’s a private business. But she must make that absolutely clear when people sign up and it should be included in the contract, signed by both parties.

I would put your child’s name down on every waiting list locally for childcare. I would beg the Childminder to reconsider for February, explaining your reasons - even if it’s just for a few days of the week. Look on childcare.co.uk to see if you can find a temp Nanny for the week. Can you find anyone with a Nanny already, that might consider sharing her for a week? Ask on local Facebook groups etc if anyone knows a TA or a childcare student that might be available for the next few half-terms (do this asap so you give yourself time to check their references, DBS etc).

@FandyRenoli I'm a childminder. Go back to yours and say you're going to really struggle and does she have any suggestions? Also ask if she knows of any other local Childminders who could have your LO in the school holidays when she's away? You won't be paying her when she's away so can use this money to hopefully pay another. I have some children who are TTO but I'm not, so have other children who come in the holidays only. You may need to amend your contract with her to TTO and take up a new one with another Childminder for holidays only? Could save you future trouble.

I would also advertise on Childcare for cover for those dates. And if you know of any children in schools ask their parents to ask in any class WhatsApp groups if they have a Childminder with holiday spaces. Also, if you have a local Facebook group, put a post up asking on there too.

Hope you get sorted.

Unfortunately she's really mislead you when you signed up. Closing between christmas and new year is rather different from shutting the entire school christmas holidays, which she said she wasn't going to do. I hope you find an alternative. What about childcare.com?