Childminder and holidays

[FandyRenoli]

Name changed for this as don't want me or childminder to be identifiable. It's long so buckle in!

LO is 1 year old (just) and started with the childminder in September. I'm a single parent, no wider family childcare support. The childminder is new to childminding but does have extensive experience in the childcare industry and excellent qualifications and references. She is married with primary school aged children. LO started with her the week she opened. Childcare is in extremely short supply in our area and I was very happy to find someone so good.

I should start by saying that the childminder (CM) is lovely and the care she provides for LO is amazing. On that front I'd recommend her to anyone.

When we went to look around she said most of the bookings she had were wrap around school care so for most of the day it's LO and one other. At that point I checked that she isn't term-time only as this just wouldn't work for me. She assured me she wasn't and said she would close between Christmas and New year, had two weeks holiday booked in the summer, and might take "the odd day here and there" for a long weekend away or similar, but would give plenty of notice plus bank holidays. All good.

At Christmas she was actually closed from 20th December to 6th January (so not just between Christmas and New year) but we managed.

At Christmas she also sent out a list of the dates she would be closed in 2025. This came to 40 days plus 8 days bank holidays. I really wasn't expecting anywhere near this many- it's nearly double my annual leave allowance and there is absolutely no way I will be given that number of extra unpaid days even if I could afford them (which I can't).

The pattern is also very focused on school holidays. She will be closed either the entire half term or the majority of it for all three half terms - February, May and October - plus a week at Easter, a couple of weeks in the summer and all of the Christmas school holidays.

I will absolutely not get annual leave now for February as this was booked up by other staff months ago, and May and October are key times in my industry where annual leave is only approved in emergencies - one of the reasons I checked CM wasn't term time only.

I messaged CM (politely) about this pointing out I'd checked she wasn't term-time only and that I just couldn't get this amount or pattern of time off.

She replied that she isn't term time only (though by my calculations she's shut for 70% of the school holidays), that she's entitled to annual leave (I agree) and that this is the usual amount of time off for a year round childminder (I'm not sure about that one).

So am I being unreasonable to be surprised/taken aback by this amount pattern of leave, and by the limited notice for leave in February?

What are other people's experiences of this?

Would I be unreasonable to expect some level of compromise from her to resolve this?

Poor childminder! Only 2 weeks holiday a year is awful.

This is a genuine nightmare OP.

You are unlikely to succeed in getting CM to take your dc in Feb hols.

Many CMs make a reciprocal arrangement with other local CMs so that there is cover for holidays. What happens if your CM is sick?

This is why you need a nursery not a CM. Get dc on a wait list asap.

Then go on your local authority websites and find a list of every cm listed in or around your area. Call round each of them until you find one who can help in Feb. Same with local nurseries, and also ask for dc to go on their waitlist for à permanent place. If you want care 5 days a week you are quite likely to get a spot above someone who only wants two afternoons. But short term: Accept a “patchwork” - eg nursery A three days a week, nursery B two days a week - until either A or B can offer 5 days.

Your dc will cope with this transition and it won’t be for long.

In the worst situation where you cannot find any help at all: ask Work if you can wfh and hire a babysitter - a student studying childcare would be ok if you’re in the house too.

As a childminder myself that is an absolutely ridiculous amount of holidays to take in a year... that's just over 9 weeks..... I hope she is not expecting to be paid by the parents.

YANBU.

in your shoes I would list for nurseries now and in the meantime you can take 4 week per year (unpaid 😵‍💫) leave to cover this.

your baby will be

https://www.gov.uk/parental-leave

i would be transparent with your employer.

shes an utter dick and has stitched you up massively.

My childminder takes off bank holidays and 4 weeks holidays a year. Is she expecting payment for when she's closed?

I had the exact same thing. And for that reason, I'd never recommend child minders to anyone but I appreciate why people use them.
I went to see my line manager and explained - in fact, I think I cried on her. I too was a single mum. We agreed that I would drop down to part time until I managed to land a nursery place. I registered with 4 places, and waited 4 months for a space. Which seemed to fly by actually. Once she was settled, I then came back to work full time.
Yes it was a struggle financially but it was either that, or lose my job altogether.

Good question!

She has nearly 10 weeks annual leave then. How does it work with the fees? Do you pay her when she’s not working?

YANBU, CM should have been more upfront when you asked her a very clear question on her annual leave plans.

I don’t know what it’s like round your way but here childminders are so in demand that if you criticise them or are difficult at all they will just drop your child for one on their waiting list.

I assume the 8 bank holidays are not a problem as you will have those also, but can you clarify regarding the other 40 days - is that 40 working days (so 8 full weeks), or 40 days including weekends (so just under 6 weeks)? I think 6 weeks annual leave is at the top end if reasonable, I know a few people who get that, but 8 weeks annual leave is unreasonable, especially in childcare.

Do you have a contract with her? If so, does it specify how many days holiday per year she would be taking? If not, I think it would be fair to ask if this was a typical amount of leave she'd be taking each year because it's unsustainable for you.

This is one of the main reasons we ended up going to a nursery from our childminder. Constant holidays and time off. It dictated when I could go away and take annual leave. Childminders are great. But not ideal if you have an inflexible job and no back up. I'd either look for a nursery place or a nursery/childminder back up for her holidays.

Her communication is off. I'd check your contract. Ours did have a notice for time off. But it was about 1 month which is enough for February. Its frustrating but not much you can do but find an alternative.

Is she charging you when she's not there? That'd be even more cheeky

If you work for a big corporate it's worth checking out their benefits package - ours comes with 10 days family care a year, which can be for children or for adults who need care, with pre-checked providers. I don't think many people here use it, but it's good to know it's there if needed.
I think your child minder has been less-than-honest. You must be fuming. Good luck.

This is the main reason DC3 is in nursery. DD1 went to a childminder and she was perfect. However she moved so when DC2 was born, I had to go to another childminder. That was an awful experience overall. She took loads of annual leave similar to this (those she doesn’t expect payment), she was off sick another 10% of the time and then closed for another 15% because her child was sick or closing early because she has an appointment in the evening. I had to take my DD out to start nursery. She’s closed her business now and works as a TA.
Many nurseries may have a waiting list when you applied but this might have shifted.
Also I notice that as you need more sessions, some nurseries will consider you ahead of someone else who might be on the wait list ahead of you but need just a few sessions so it’s worth checking as they’re a business after all

Yup that’s term time only in my book. My child minder closes between Christmas and NY and a week in the summer. Sometimes she adds an extra day to a BH weekend but always with loads of notice. I’d be cross too in your position but she won’t change so the only thing you can do is look for alternatives and get your name on waiting lists.

YANBU

You should have a contract that sets out how much holiday she will take.

I'm a childminder and I take 2 weeks a year.

I'd find new childcare. And if she has breached the contract on holidays you won't have to do the notice period

OP can't choose when to take her unpaid parental leave though. She has already said it won't be approved for the times required (presumably as everyone wants/has already booked those half term/school holiday times).

I has this stress too, when I looked at options you can get holiday nannies and fill in nannies, more expensive but will cover you while you work out what to do. Get names down for nurseries too for the long term. I would also start thinking ahead to how you manage nursery and school holidays. You are also entitled to unpaid parental leave with an employer to cover such things, would look into that too if you are absolutely stuck.

YANBU because she has changed the arrangement from what was agreed.

however she can do this. So I think you need to find another provider.

Get on some waiting lists for nursery asap. The nursery my boys go to literally closes 6pm Christmas Eve until 7:45 2nd January and that’s it so we have no other weeks where we struggle.

In the meantime maybe try a nursery that offers both a term time only and a year round option to see if they have any capacity in the school holiday weeks where they have less kids just to take little one for those weeks initially. Or speak to the parents of the other child and see what plans they have, if they’re paying for a nanny or something then maybe you can chip in together or maybe they’re having the same stress so maybe you can suggest chipping in together for alternative care.

I hope she’s not expecting payment for these weeks that she’s closed!

One of the reasons why we chose our childminder was because her own children were grown up and she would cover some of the school holidays. Obviously she did take holidays but we managed to take our leave at the same time or cover it between us. I'd try and find another arrangement if possible.

I was shocked too as my CM is also taking a similar amount of time off, I only use 2 days and the ‘odd days’ are always on the day my DD goes!! She did however give this list in October and between us we are able to cover.

It's very hard for you and I can understand why she is upset but you can't expect her to compromise. It is her business and this is what she is offering. I assume she wants the time off to spend with her children when they are off school.
She is right that she isn't offered just term time but she should have told you she planned to take a large portion of them off
I don't think it will be difficult for her to full your place.