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Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think the call back into the office is an example of the patriarchy very much alive and well?

720 replies

Yestttlo · 11/01/2025 19:21

And anyone who thinks otherwise is either brainwashed by the patriarchy or isn’t a mother with a huge proportion of child related responsibility on her shoulders? (Or someone who is in a job where they can’t work from home so don’t want to support other women having the right to).

I have worked from home since covid. Been in the office eight times where it was necessary, for instance a company away day or face to face client meeting. I have a young dc and the call back to the office will damage my career progression due to time spent travelling which means I can’t be online longer and because I will be stretched to get household stuff done .. no I don’t mean I clean the toilets during work hours but that I can put a wash on first thing and know I can unload it at lunch, or get cooking done for the evening during my lunch break which means my evening is not chaotic and I can actually rest a little before starting in full force again the next day.

I will be fighting it to the very end. I will make my views clear. I strongly believe that forcing people into offices hugely disproportionately affects women. My work can be done anywhere. Forcing back into offices is a neon sign that the patriarchy is alive and well. Thoughts?

OP posts:
TempestTost · 13/01/2025 02:21

RavenofEngland · 12/01/2025 20:16

We had a similar situation at my workplace when everything reopened after lockdown. My team were extremely reluctant to go back into the office full-time and we had to put forward a case as to say why we wanted to remain WFH. For me personally, I went full-time when we started WFH and if I had to go back in the office full-time, I would have to return to part-time hours. In the end management agreed that we would return to the office for face-to-face meetings every quarter and I also go into the office once a month. In actual fact a lot of our senior management team live outside of the county so it’s a big commitment for them to come into the office and they certainly wouldn’t be able to do it every single day. Some of the team go on a regular basis every week but we determine that wfh for the majority of the time was the best course of action for our team. We proved that we were more productive and in fact, our work life balance improved as well.

This thing of people living very far away was one reason my brother's workplace started requiring office time.

In his work, people can often WFH effectively a lot of the time, and in fact work from various locations as part of the job. But when COVID hit, suddenly they were working from home all the time, and toward the end, people started moving further away - in one case to another country! But in all cases, far enough away that they could not get into the office without it being a big deal, planned ahead.

The problem is, that there are situations where they do need to have a portion of the workers in the office - usually at short notice, and it constitutes an emergency. There is in fact a call list protocol for such situations.

The people who had moved tried to say it was fine because others still lived close enough to cover these eventualities - but this meant that those people would always be the ones on the hook - and not making more money for it either. So - they decided they all had to work from an office location several times a week.

WhiteRosesAndCandles · 13/01/2025 03:46

@TempestTost I have lived in a different city to where I work for 20 years. My commute is worse because public sector transport is awful and getting worse all of the time.

I take a bus and train. There used to be buses every ten minutes from a stop by my house. I now have to walk ten minutes to a bus stop. Buses should be every 20 mins. At least once a week, the bus simply doesn't turn up. Same in the way home.

In the same timescale house prices have gone crazy, wages have simply not kept up. Employees struggling financially due to the economy and rising fuel prices is an issue for employers.

Cost for travel and everything else is a lot more expensive. I am extremely grateful not to need to pay for childcare and to have bought my house when I did. I cannot afford to move nearer.

I have WFH for a very long time. Ime people are more productive WFH. It also offers a better work life balance for a lot of people. If my salary is not going to keep up with inflation, flexibility and working for a progress employer is very important to me.

dottiehens · 13/01/2025 05:21

namechangeGOT · 11/01/2025 19:36

No thanks. If I was working from home then all the work in the home would be picked up by me. All the networking and meeting of new people/contacts, and I mean properly meeting them not online, would pass me by. I don't want to be chained to my house. I want a career outside of my where I relax, live and sleep. We make it work and I don't think it's difficult to do so.

Good points. I think people should be able to WFH if they prefer. It is not a one fits all situation anyway. It is nice that it became an option and it has been positive for many people.

NoWordForFluffy · 13/01/2025 06:01

ShirkingFromHome95 · 12/01/2025 22:51

Well, studies seem to suggest that the majority of people believe that they're more productive working from home (73% in last one I read) but that management disagree. The reality is not yet clear but certainly a lot of data suggests that 100% wfh is the least productive and hybrid is sometimes on a par with working in the office but may not be.

There also seems to be a possible link between people who prefer wfh being significantly less productive at home when compared to those who prefer working in the office. I wonder if this reflects the fact that some people want to wfh for less ethical reasons (like longer lunches and being able to hide from management etc).

But who really knows at this stage.

Yes, all very well and good. But I am, as it's measurable as I log my time.

I'm not sure how they measure those who don't actually have to log time though to get to the alleged 73%. And, as I said, if people are less productive, then managers need to do something about it.

ItFellOffAgain · 13/01/2025 06:16

Yestttlo · 11/01/2025 19:21

And anyone who thinks otherwise is either brainwashed by the patriarchy or isn’t a mother with a huge proportion of child related responsibility on her shoulders? (Or someone who is in a job where they can’t work from home so don’t want to support other women having the right to).

I have worked from home since covid. Been in the office eight times where it was necessary, for instance a company away day or face to face client meeting. I have a young dc and the call back to the office will damage my career progression due to time spent travelling which means I can’t be online longer and because I will be stretched to get household stuff done .. no I don’t mean I clean the toilets during work hours but that I can put a wash on first thing and know I can unload it at lunch, or get cooking done for the evening during my lunch break which means my evening is not chaotic and I can actually rest a little before starting in full force again the next day.

I will be fighting it to the very end. I will make my views clear. I strongly believe that forcing people into offices hugely disproportionately affects women. My work can be done anywhere. Forcing back into offices is a neon sign that the patriarchy is alive and well. Thoughts?

Are you writing an essay for a feminism course?
Unless you were employed to wfh, itcseems you've ridden the gravy train for so long, you've lost focus regarding your responsibility and accountability.
Did you have your child before wfh, or did you think 'oh, this is handy, I'll have a child now because it suits me'. Now you're being asked to do what many of us have done throughout their lives and you blame it on the patriachy??
Priceless!

ItFellOffAgain · 13/01/2025 06:18

Yestttlo · 11/01/2025 19:29

@Hufflemuff employers are the patriarchy. Wake up a bit.

Even if your employer is a woman?
Hilarious!

ItFellOffAgain · 13/01/2025 06:19

Yestttlo · 11/01/2025 19:35

@Shooperpooper yes i will fight it until it gets messy if it has to. I am fortunate to be in circumstances where I can do so without worry about money. But there’s no way I will let it go and will make it incredibly hard for them to force me out

I so wish you were my employee...

neverwakeasleepingbaby · 13/01/2025 06:56

Morning all, just awoken (well, at 6am because small children). Already put a wash on, it's running until 8am. Will get dressed shortly, do the nursery run, hang up said washing, and settle into a productive day of work at 8:30am. If I was going into the office I wouldn't be at my desk until 9am having battled with the trains. I wouldn't have been able to put the washing on because it will have been sat in the machine all day. Instead, it will be done before I start work.

So, I'm doing my washing BEFORE work, in my commuting time, rather than during, for all those that say I'm a shirker.

I'm sure I'll be billing a lot today. Got a nice beefy case to work on. If I need to discuss with my colleague (who is also WFH) we'll have a Teams call and usually a chat about our kids who are the same age.

Today is going to be a good day

Debtfreegoals · 13/01/2025 08:10

Artesia · 11/01/2025 19:24

Totally disagree. WFH traps women into having to do it all. Unless both partners are wfh and splitting the jobs equally. But how many men talk about enjoying wfh because they can pop a wash on at lunchtime?

I actually agree with this. I’m not sure employers would particularly care if you don’t get to do housework on days wfh either. I’m someone who does split between office and home, and I enjoy the days I go into the office and get out the house.

Wexone · 13/01/2025 08:22

ShirkingFromHome95 · 13/01/2025 00:21

Of course anyone is going to have a better quality of life if they arent sitting in traffic twice a day and have more time for gyms and homemade food or whatever.

True, but isolation is possibly an even bigger factor in MH than the daily commute. I suffered from major depressive disorder as a youth and I love getting home from work and hate the lines being blurred - e.g. having my free time in the same room I've been in all day.

Most people that only work eight hours a day should be able to make time for the gym unless they have a lot of other responsibilities (which I appreciate some do). It's about the least hours you can do in a FT job notwithstanding special cases.

But others may of course feel differently.

yes most people work 8 hours a day but you are not factoring time to get there drop off for childcare pets etc. I only have to do an 8 hour day but it takes 1.5 hours to 2 hours to get there. there factor in up shower dressesed properly dog etc to ger out the door in time not to hit traffic. I would be up about half 5 to leave for half 6. this noring instead I got up about 7. showered and put on hoody and jeans no need for make up etc as no video calls. walked dog dishwasher just gone on abd washing machine too. Will log on now at half 8. yes I will empty washing machine on my tea break and dishwasher. Will walk dog at lunchtime and prepare my dinner. when I log off then I won't be rushing to get home before 7 I will walk from my office to my kitchen. its blissful. I will interact with my team as well as us and European colleagues and will have a productive day done. I never had time for gym or anything as I called my school days before covid. I wouldn't say yes to anything nor plan to meet friends etc unless I had no work on morning. to be able to do that now and gave time back is so so precious

chocolatespreadsandwich · 13/01/2025 08:26

neverwakeasleepingbaby · 13/01/2025 06:56

Morning all, just awoken (well, at 6am because small children). Already put a wash on, it's running until 8am. Will get dressed shortly, do the nursery run, hang up said washing, and settle into a productive day of work at 8:30am. If I was going into the office I wouldn't be at my desk until 9am having battled with the trains. I wouldn't have been able to put the washing on because it will have been sat in the machine all day. Instead, it will be done before I start work.

So, I'm doing my washing BEFORE work, in my commuting time, rather than during, for all those that say I'm a shirker.

I'm sure I'll be billing a lot today. Got a nice beefy case to work on. If I need to discuss with my colleague (who is also WFH) we'll have a Teams call and usually a chat about our kids who are the same age.

Today is going to be a good day

I mean, you I'm not sure this is the feminist victory you think it is....

chocolatespreadsandwich · 13/01/2025 08:27

neverwakeasleepingbaby · 13/01/2025 06:56

Morning all, just awoken (well, at 6am because small children). Already put a wash on, it's running until 8am. Will get dressed shortly, do the nursery run, hang up said washing, and settle into a productive day of work at 8:30am. If I was going into the office I wouldn't be at my desk until 9am having battled with the trains. I wouldn't have been able to put the washing on because it will have been sat in the machine all day. Instead, it will be done before I start work.

So, I'm doing my washing BEFORE work, in my commuting time, rather than during, for all those that say I'm a shirker.

I'm sure I'll be billing a lot today. Got a nice beefy case to work on. If I need to discuss with my colleague (who is also WFH) we'll have a Teams call and usually a chat about our kids who are the same age.

Today is going to be a good day

I mean, I'm not sure this is the feminist victory you think it is....

Emotionalsupporthamster · 13/01/2025 08:28

Thing is, you don’t get to dictate the terms of your contract. You can negotiate but at the end of the day the employer gets to decide what’s best for the business and you can decide if you want to continue with the terms of your contract or to look elsewhere. It’s not unreasonable for that to include some face to face time with colleagues. Are they demanding full time back in the office? That would be quite unusual at this stage to go straight from a situation of entirely home working but for a couple of days a year since Covid.

GoldOP · 13/01/2025 08:46

I do find it a little baffling that people who took office based jobs are now outraged they are being called back into the office. I have friends who have wfh since Covid and have made no secret about taking breaks in the working day to go and get a manicure, walk the dog, have a nap etc Their defence is that so long as the work gets done what’s the issue?
Its not normal though is it and a lot of employers must be sensing a reduction in productivity.
I fall into the category of my job not being poss to do at home and I’m glad as I can’t think of anything worse than working in the place I call home!

Puzzledandpissedoff · 13/01/2025 09:04

I know people who have cancelled childcare due to WFH???? Speaks volumes, how can you care for children while 'working'?

Interestingly, during Covid, the board was rammed with posts insisting you can't @GivingitToGod
Strange how that's changed now WFH has become more "expected" ...

denhaag · 13/01/2025 09:21

GoldOP · 13/01/2025 08:46

I do find it a little baffling that people who took office based jobs are now outraged they are being called back into the office. I have friends who have wfh since Covid and have made no secret about taking breaks in the working day to go and get a manicure, walk the dog, have a nap etc Their defence is that so long as the work gets done what’s the issue?
Its not normal though is it and a lot of employers must be sensing a reduction in productivity.
I fall into the category of my job not being poss to do at home and I’m glad as I can’t think of anything worse than working in the place I call home!

What's wrong with using your lunch hour to do as you wish?
If someone is indeed getting their work done and management have no concerns, what's the problem?
This conflicts with you then going on to say employers are sensing a reduction in productivity. Do you mean that your friends say they are getting the work done, but actually aren't?

I've always worked from home in this role so there is no difference in productivity.

I have a garden office so I 'go to work'. It's good that you are happy with your own set up. I am happy with mine.

GoldOP · 13/01/2025 09:37

denhaag · 13/01/2025 09:21

What's wrong with using your lunch hour to do as you wish?
If someone is indeed getting their work done and management have no concerns, what's the problem?
This conflicts with you then going on to say employers are sensing a reduction in productivity. Do you mean that your friends say they are getting the work done, but actually aren't?

I've always worked from home in this role so there is no difference in productivity.

I have a garden office so I 'go to work'. It's good that you are happy with your own set up. I am happy with mine.

Managers are clearly seeing an issue with their staff if people are being called back into the office. I never said that people I know are necessarily using a “lunch break” to get things done, they are using work time to nip out and get a manicure or have a nap, would they do that when office based?

SteveBognor · 13/01/2025 09:42

But everything is mens' fault - did you not get the email?

denhaag · 13/01/2025 09:51

GoldOP · 13/01/2025 09:37

Managers are clearly seeing an issue with their staff if people are being called back into the office. I never said that people I know are necessarily using a “lunch break” to get things done, they are using work time to nip out and get a manicure or have a nap, would they do that when office based?

As I said above - like many things, a few spoil it for the rest.
I wonder in some cases whether management are just poorly managing their wfh staff ie. rather than deal with the slacker who's taking a 2hr nap during working time, they're taking the easy way and calling everyone back in.

BIossomtoes · 13/01/2025 10:05

denhaag · 13/01/2025 09:51

As I said above - like many things, a few spoil it for the rest.
I wonder in some cases whether management are just poorly managing their wfh staff ie. rather than deal with the slacker who's taking a 2hr nap during working time, they're taking the easy way and calling everyone back in.

How can they deal with behaviour they can’t see or prove?

denhaag · 13/01/2025 10:10

BIossomtoes · 13/01/2025 10:05

How can they deal with behaviour they can’t see or prove?

Manager : we need to address why your productivity has dropped while you've been wfh

Employee stops taking the piss or continues to and manager follows usual procedures

GivingitToGod · 13/01/2025 10:15

denhaag · 13/01/2025 09:21

What's wrong with using your lunch hour to do as you wish?
If someone is indeed getting their work done and management have no concerns, what's the problem?
This conflicts with you then going on to say employers are sensing a reduction in productivity. Do you mean that your friends say they are getting the work done, but actually aren't?

I've always worked from home in this role so there is no difference in productivity.

I have a garden office so I 'go to work'. It's good that you are happy with your own set up. I am happy with mine.

My understanding is that most job contracts are by number of hours you are paid for.
In my industry, the work is ongoing and never ' done,'
WFH has created a divided nation where it is predominantly available for those in middle class roles/ professions ( obviously depending on nature of the work).
We need to be honest that I am sure there are people who do work their contracted hours WFH but a significant number don't. I know several people who fit into second category

Ukrainebaby23 · 13/01/2025 10:25

I'm told it's about the corporate businesses who rely on business rents, which are declining as people wfh.

TempestTost · 13/01/2025 10:33

NoWordForFluffy · 13/01/2025 06:01

Yes, all very well and good. But I am, as it's measurable as I log my time.

I'm not sure how they measure those who don't actually have to log time though to get to the alleged 73%. And, as I said, if people are less productive, then managers need to do something about it.

You know the thread isn't about you though?

You may be conscientious, and your productivity may be straight forward to assess.

That's not true of many jobs.

This is why mouse jigglers have become so common, and a headache for managers.

NoWordForFluffy · 13/01/2025 10:43

TempestTost · 13/01/2025 10:33

You know the thread isn't about you though?

You may be conscientious, and your productivity may be straight forward to assess.

That's not true of many jobs.

This is why mouse jigglers have become so common, and a headache for managers.

Gosh. Isn't it?

I responded in that way as the PP had a disbelieving tone to their response, suggesting I was mistaken.

The rest of my post should have made that clear to you.

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