do all beneficiaries have to be paid at the same time

[Trebor57]

Hi,

Long story short , I lost my beloved Grandma in October 2023, she was in a care home so a lot of her money went towards that, however she did have a house that had only just been sold before she passed so all that was left.

Her Will instructions consist of her 4 Grandchildren (including me) getting £1000 each and the rest to be split equally between my mum and her sister who are both the executives ( after the costs this will result in about £70k each).

Me my brother and my mum and dad did everything for my grandma and loved her dearly, we would try so hard to convince her to upgrade her boiler, windows, spend money on taxis instead of trapsing around on the bus and spend money to improve her living and keeping herself warm, my mums sister on the other hand was the complete opposite and scare monger her into spending her money for her own advantage and barely bothered with her.

The day after My Grandma died she was already on about booking an appointment at the solicitors ( which i found very strange and distasteful) and has been constantly nagging at my mum to complain with her about how long the solicitors were taking to sort the probate out ETC, basically she is desperate for the money, that to be honest she doesn't really deserve, please don't think this post is about me not wanting her to have her 'fare share' or wanting her share for myself as my parents, myself and Brother all have our own money and always have done and would much preferred our Grandmother to have spent it on herself more.

Anyways just before Christmas, I received a letter from her solicitors advising me about the £1000 I have been left and to complete a FOA with my bank details so they can make that payment to me, I immediately shoved it in a drawer not ready to face up to what is the final chapter of My Dear Grandma's life/death.

Anyway much to my surprise I have had chase letters from the solicitors for this form, so I can only assume they wont get paid until they have paid everyone out,
But I am just wondering if anyone knows if all beneficiaries have to be paid at the same time, as we are all wondering if my mums sister has been nagging them for her payment?
( PS we don't really talk to my mums sister as she is not a very nice person so cant really ask her)

and to be honest if that is the case, I'm happy to leave it in the drawer for a while if she is that desperate for her mum who she treated terribly over the years money and to be honest my mum feels the same, call me petty I don't care

Anyone know from experience if it will make a difference me withholding my FOA?

The solicitor will want everything done so they can close the client, it’s annoying having half-done cases ongoing and it’s easy for them to get lost in the system.

You have nothing to gain by withholding. You could have filled in the form in the time it’s taken to write this post.

The solicitor probably wants to just complete the piece of work, which can’t be done until they’ve paid you.

They will probably have the money in their own bank account at present - so your not receiving it requires some management on their behalf.

By refusing to engage you are just dragging the process out for everyone - including the executors.

No, they don;t have to be paid all at the same time and it would be usual to pay small cash legacies such as yours, before the beneficiaries were paid the residue of the estate as that may need longer to establish.

But a solicitor would chase an unreturned form as they will want to tie everything up. Their charges may be more if things are prolonged and they have to chase forms etc.

I assume the executors are choosing to use solicitors or is the solicitor named as an executor?

They need to pay the fixed sums first, then divide the estate, and really you shouldn’t be holding up the process and potentially incurring more solicitors fees.

They need to close the case. If the fund's interests dip or are not in line with their fees you may end up having to pay the solicitors more for their time. They are not a charity holding on to your piggy bank. Sorry for your loss.

She does "deserve" her money because it is rightfully hers. Your Grandmother left it to her in her will.

But thats not the point.

The point is op is asking if delaying completion of the form will cause issues and delays to the disliked relative

If your mum's sister has been nagging the solicitor for her payments as joint executor why doesn't she just dispense with the services of the solicitor and distribute the money herself.

She could turn up with cash if she wanted to (although bank transfer is ore easily traced/recorded).

My dad has been executor/beneficiary of residiual estate for an old family friend. We applied for probate ourselves, set up an executor bank account and distributed the legacies one by one.

You are going against your grandmother’s wishes by not filling out the form.

I really am sorry for your loss, and I know how hard it is when you don’t feel someone is deserving, believe me, but that’s what your grandmother stipulated, and you must respect that. 💐

Solicitors can't really win can they.

Half the time people are moaning they go too slow. The other half they are going too fast.

I doubt whether they have to pay all the beneficeries at the same time but don't know for sure.

If you hold out for longer they may just send you a cheque by recorded mail and at that point the matter may be closed.

The residuary beneficiaries can receive an interim payment then get the balance once the legatees bother to provide their bank details and the final fee can be paid and the bank account closed.

So basically you're hoping that you'll annoy your "undeserving" aunt by making it slow and drag it out as long as possible.

And just because she had a difference of opinion doesn't mean she is underserving, or even wrong in her opinion.

Not really thinking about anyone other than yourself, are you?

Sorry for your loss, but I think your reluctance to complete your form only delays the payment to you, no one else. The solicitor will have allocated your £1000 bequest and will continue their work until such time as the entire estate has been distributed. You'll just be holding the solicitor up so they can't close their file.

The day after My Grandma died she was already on about booking an appointment at the solicitors ( which i found very strange and distasteful)

Not distasteful at all. Assuming the executors felt unable to deal with the estate themselves a solicitors appointment at the earliest possible time would mean that they could for example get on with organising the funeral and organising payment for that.

Surely if your mum is getting a share and your brother you'll know by now whether it's been paid out?

Something seems very off with your post.

The Funeral was already paid for and sorted, not everything is about Money, My aunty couldn't be bothered to drive 10 miles to say her final good byes to my Grandma when the home warned us it was near the end, but was happy to drive 15 miles the next day to go straight to the solicitors with an excited tone of voice, like a child on the way to collect a prize , so yeah one would say distasteful

They feel the same as me, we don't want this Money we wanted my Grandma to have it instead but every time we tried to convince her to leave her heating on as long as she wanted My auntie would be gaslighting her saying oh that will be too expensive ( too who when she had her own money to pay for it) and telling her to use a blanket instead

No , I am thinking of my Grandma, who's death should be mourned for even if she was 97, not people doing cartwheels about inheritance.

@Trebor57 so have your mum & brother not filled the FOAs?
It's going to accumulate more solicitors fees.

If you don't want the money donate it to charity.

Just sign the form and don’t be a dick. Your opinion on your aunt are irrelevant.

By prolonging in not signing the documents and keeping her estate from being wound up all you're doing is giving away your Grandma's money to solicitors, which I'm sure is not what she'd want.

Once this is done you never have to associate with the aunt again.

You're not making your grandmother's death more mourned in any sense by withholding the form. Just annoying the solicitor, who's only trying to do their job. Sorry for your loss.

This feels like a classic case of cutting nose off to spite face here.

I appreciate you are still mourning your grandmother but will not help in the long run.

One of the jobs of a grieving relative is to carry out their loved one's wishes in a timely and dignified manner.
Think about how many times since her death you have used the phrase 'what grandma would have wanted' - the casket, the service, the flowers, any charitable collection, what she wore, whether there was a wake, and on and on.
Now complete the final acts and allow her estate to be settled as she herself in her final testament requested. This is not the time for family aggro.