Male staff in nursery’s

[Itsoneofthose]

Ok, hear me out.. I know this is controversial but today I was shown around a nursery for the first time. I’m dreading leaving my little one, only because I’ll miss her and worry about her. I don’t think my worry is out of proportion or anything like that though. But today I saw two male nursery nurses. Now, I know there are many men who are great with kids, and not all men are a threat to children (obviously) and women can also potentially pose a threat to children but I just don’t know how I feel about male nursery staff. Hmmm. I know I’ll be shot down in flames for this. Nursery’s are well regulated etc etc. I just can’t help feeling a bit uneasy about the whole thing. Has anyone else experienced these thoughts? AIBU

I wouldn't use a nursery with male staff. No way. I don't care what other people say. I think it's a naive attitude. Don't be bullied into doing something you don't think is right. No, not all men are a danger to children, but some are, and there have been too many cases where this hasn't gone well. Trust your instincts,

Female staff in nursery can abuse children.

All the horror stories I've read in the news over the last year have all been female staff members being negligent or abusive.

Yes sadly we have seen that in the devastating case of Vanessa George. However as I said SA is overwhelmingly committed by men. This is indisputable and backed up by all the stats. Sadly men will always be a higher risk to children.

I’m pleased to hear he wouldn’t be offended as it’s important patients can refuse if they feel uncomfortable.

But we shouldn't put our fears on the children. I think you do that if you refuse male staff in nurseries and schools but of you do you.

Nurseries

Thing is a lot of shifts are covered by female nurses only. I have seen a few shifts only covered by male nurses.
if you need urgent care or treatment you don't get a choice of the nurse's sex.

I can't believe the amount of people on here jumping to defend men so strongly. We live in a world where 97% of all sex crimes are perpetrated by men. Of course 'not all men'. but do you know which men? No! No one does. That's why we have safeguarding. And usually the people who aren't paedos are the ones who are happy to follow the rules. I wouldn't want a man changing my kids nappy. Same reason why I don't know why men are gynecologists. It only takes one man to abuse someone.

Sex offenders target places where they get easy access to children, and they also get their friends to work there too. If these men worked in the same room I wouldn't be comfortable with that.

But I do understand that men need to be seen to be in caring professions, especially early school settings, to set a good example to boys. There just needs to be more safeguarding in place for men, and they should never be allowed to be on their own with a child. If they aren't sex pests, they shouldn't object to basic safeguarding.

Anything women can do can be done much better by men. Women are very silly and any concerns they have about men who commit 99% of all sex crimes are nonsense and they need to brush aside any feelings of unease and be kind to the menz.

i can’t believe there are parents here sending their babies and toddlers to nurseries with female carers when it’s obvious all the best carers are male according to this thread

I dont believe it’s about putting fears on to children it’s about risk assessing and teaching your children healthy boundaries. We teach our children about the PANTS rule, not to talk to strangers, not to go away with strangers etc . None of that is about scaring children it’s about teaching them how to keep themselves safe. But all of that is not possible with nursery children as they aren’t developmentally ready to understand these boundaries therefore it’s for us to risk assess as parents and for me the risk of unknown males doing nappy changes and intimate care is too high. I have no problems with male teachers etc as they are much less likely to be doing such intimate care and school age children are more able to talk up about any untoward behaviour.

I can't believe I'm reading that so many women think men are better at everything than women, including looking after small children. If it was obvious by looking at them who the sexual predators were there wouldn't be any sex crimes. No men anywhere near children. It's not safe.

I haven't read the full thread but I gather there's a load of shite.

There was one male member of staff in my children's nursery. He was amazing with the children and he was gay.

Oh wise the fuck up, most men aren't predators!

Does that include male teachers?? All three of my children had at least one male teacher and they were fabulous with the kids!

They can but about 98% of sexual abuse is carried out by males so on reflection i’ll put my trust more on women. Shock horror i also told my children to approach a woman over a man if they ever got lost or needed help

No men anywhere near children. It's not safe

Husbands? Grandfathers? Uncles? Actually when you consider that most SA occurs in the family, you're probably right.

But that's not what you mean, is it?

Men aren't better than women.
Children benefit by both sex taking care of them. Children need good role models.
But of course people can choose - if they can find a nursery with male staff. It's not a right as parents.

I understand why nurseries and schools struggle to recruit staff.

But the vast majority of predators are men and babies and toddlers are completely vulnerable and at the mercy of those caring for them

I’ve never known that in any hospital I’ve worked in. I feel for patients who would like the choice and have had many female patients refuse intimate care by a male nurse, and a few men who have asked for a man, which I can understand too.

Sadly, I am wise. That's how I know that men can't be trusted with children. If you allow male carers to be with children you're taking a risk. Many, many people have found it's a risk not worth taking. I'm not sure why you are so quick to defend men. I find it naive.

That’ll be the shit pay and working conditions.

I have seen it quite often. At night you don't have a lot of staff present.

• and parents' crazy ideas.