Father’s behaviour towards child

[Questions112]

Posting for traffic.

I am after some quick opinions on a situation this evening.

4 year old was in the bathroom before bed, and ‘D’P decided it would be funny to lock them in from outside. I asked him not to but was ignored. Unsurprisingly, 4YO got upset and cried when they realised they couldn’t open the door (they could have unlocked it from inside, but panicked).

4YO ran straight to me afterwards as they knew DP had locked the door. DP then told them they weren’t a baby anymore and should think about the situations they are in and not cry (to clarify - DC IS FOUR YEARS OLD!).

I’m just left with a really bad feeling and don’t know if I am overreacting.

YABU - totally fine and normal behaviour from DP
YANBU - not normal and cruel

This is really disturbing OP.

my 4 year old locked himself in a bathroom at my friend’s house and the lock got stuck…coincidence and no one’s fault but it took us good 10 mins to break the lock and open the door. He was hysterical. It really shook him up and it took me some time to calm him down. I dont know why anyone would find it funny and do it as a joke? Let alone a father, grown man to
a child? Really disturbing.

have you noticed this kind of behaviour before?

He's a bullying cunt.

No comment about the arsehole man? The woman is always to blame?

He might be testing you to see how much abuse he can get away with.
This. The major problem here is if you leave him he will be an abusive man alone with your poor son.

This is such utterly bizarre behaviour. If you are saying he just did it for a 'joke', I cannot imagine this is someone you'd want in your child's life.
He was making a game/having a laff at scaring a 4 year old child. People are right to say he is a bully with no respect for your child. He will damage him. You must protect him.

Leave.
his bullying will become more abusive as your child gets older.
and if you don’t leave your child will believe this is acceptable and will replicate this mindset.

At best, an idiot, at worst, an abusive shit.

Nasty bully. It needs curtailing now, if he does it again that would be the last time, I would be leaving and taking the child

I never blamed her? I think it goes without saying that he is an abusive arsehole, if she is choosing to share her life with such a fine specimen of a man she should be protecting her son from him in the very least, hence me asking why she didn't deal with it appropriately at the time.

If he isn't the child's father then she should not be tolerating one more second of him in their lives.

Did he give you any insight as to what he was thinking when he did that? Was it out of character or normal for him?

Not normal behaviour, it wouldn't be funny at any age. I shudder to think of someone doing that to my DC.

Oh OP that’s horrendous! Your poor DS. I still remember how scared I was when I accidentally got locked in my DG’s shed & I was older than your DS.

He wanted, as an adult, to upset the child.

How is he in general?

This is awful. Why are you letting this person scare your child like this ? They would be OUT. It won’t be funny when your child develops a fear of going to the toilet and starts wetting themselves . Stupid awful bully.

A cruel and weird thing to do to a small child. A bit alarming tbh.

A joke is supposed to be funny. Scaring a small child isn't funny. I wouldn't want him anywhere near my children, he sounds like a psycho 😳

Why on earth did you let him lock the door? Are you scared of him?

Yeah, I don’t like this. It seems antagonistic

Very strange thing to do - he knew it would upset his child but did it anyway…what was he hoping to gain from this?

I hope you ripped him a new one OP.

do you have a shed and a secure padlock?
see what twat face thinks of being locked in it.
or just change the locks when he's out.

Is this DC’s dad or just your partner? If it’s a partner get rid of him, he’s vile and shouldn’t be around children. End of.

If he’s their dad then it’s difficult, because he has parental responsibility, so if you split from him he’d then have shared custody and DC would be without you to protect them.

Can't be the first time you have seen this side of him.

You need to look at a way out, he is causing damage to your child.

Obviously this man is an absolute arsehole.

Well, it's difficult to think of another explanation right away.

The worst thing is he thought it was funny to frighten this child. Which he knew would happen, it did. And then he taunted him afterwards.

This child already knows this man is a brute.

This is what he does in front of you, OP. Just you wonder what happens when you aren't there.

Nothing good. Get rid of this horrible abusive bastard

Sorry if I'm missing the point, but why is the bathroom door lockable from the outside?

Alarm bells should be clanging! HEED THEM! Look after your son. Don’t let the prick talk you around.