To think the British educational system is all wrong?

[CookiePlough]

It seems like the aim is to make adults out of children as soon as possible rather than allowing them enough time to just be kids.

My main issues are that 1. kids start school way too early and 2. spend way too much time in school.

What is the purpose of a 4 year old child learning to read and write and do addition and subtraction? How does this help the child either in the present or in the future when they are an adult? I can see that 4 year olds are clearly capable of learning these things and of course being able to read or do simple arithmetic is not a problem. The problem is what are they missing out on in order to learn these skills? In my opinion they are missing out on playing. Unstructured, self determined playing. You can learn academics at a later age but you can't really make up for not getting enough playtime as a child. However, this wouldn't be a problem if the school day wasn't so ridiculously long. There just isn't enough time to play after school. There is no time to go anywhere after school (eg the park), for playdates, for any play that takes longer than an hour, to do extra curricular activities (without missing out on Unstructured play time) or anything else. Everything has to be done on the weekend but then when do you have time to do things as a family?

I understand most kids have 2 parents working full time so kids need to be in some sort of childcare setting but even nursery is preferable at thst age to school as there is more unstructured play and more adult supervision. School requires much more in terms of social skills, resilience etc. Which kids,should learn but not by suddenly being dropped in it.

I'm just ranting because I'm tired and upset rather than explaining my points properly. And it's not like I can change the system. I just feel so sad that kids are missing out on being kids. It's not the worst childhood obviously but it's also not as good as it could be.

Most primary schools don’t do team sports but preps do. At senior school I remember the horrors of team sports and not being picked but those days have gone. My girls weren’t in teams, other than house teams (sports day etc) but they did participate in sports lessons but not on a competitive basis. So more for exercise. That was ok for them. I hid in the library. Total avoidance if I could manage it. Sport defined the school though.

Cannot imagine girls beating boys at rugby. Some sports should not be mixed.

@hazelnutvanillalatte

Hmmm, I don't agree on delaying potty training and nor does ERIC, which recommends potty training before 30 months for future bladder and bowel health. Waiting until later for my kids, who were definitely aware when they were about to poo, would have just reinforcing to them that they should poo in a nappy.

Lots of parents of NT kids who are capable of training don't want to take annual leave for potty training and don't want to have the jeopardy of a very occasional accident in a distracted or overtired 2 year old and would prefer to keep spending their money on nappies that go to landfill - that's not ideal, but it is their choice. I do object to the idea that it's necessarily what's in kids' best interests though!

I took 2 weeks of annual leave in the summer to train my 2 year old son, second of which was on holiday and so many people told me they wouldn't want to waste their holiday on this - it really wasn't that hard, you have to watch 2 year olds all the time and I got to do it in the sunshine; he was very reliable on outings within 10 days.

I'm talking about potty training at 12-15 months, which was common in my parents' generation, vs letting it come naturally now which is usually around 36 months in my experience and those in my circle - none of whom have had any problems. The only ones who have are those who started too early and caused a fear/aversion in babies who weren't ready.

I agree. The amount of pressure and stress placed on our children from such a young age is awful. My youngest was considered behind because they didn't want to mark make or respond to instructions at the age of 4. Fast forward a few years and they are one of the top students on their year and their handwriting is beautiful. Yet we got so much pressure from the school in regards to it. My eldest children kept being told how gsces were vital to get anywhere in life and that they had to do well to have a chance to do anything. Yes they are important but they are not the be all and end all in life.

The fun has been taken out of education both for the pupils and the teachers.

@hazelnutvanillalatte

I don't think you need to wait until 36 months. Again, ERIC says too late.

I think that the people who cause an aversion are people who start early and think they can get it done by forcing it in a weekend and they will be done. It's like all things in parenting - reading your kids' cues and adapting to their style.

Most NT kids can get it at 2, it's just that they require more input to do it. By which I don't mean parents forcing them and being very result orientated and putting their expectations on their kids based on what a book tells them they will "achieve". It's simply observing them, knowing them well enough to see that they are showing signs of knowing that they are about to poo (very unusual for a child not to do this by 2 - many kids take themselves somewhere quieter immediately beforehand by 18 months) and having a close enough relationship with them to be able to support them to make progress in their understanding even if it is slow. And stopping if it is stressful or distressing - in most cases, it really doesn't need to be.

I don't think there was much aversion in older generations 30 years ago, who mostly trained between 18 months and 30 months rather than 12-15. Probably because life was slower, more mothers were at home and there was more time to be patient.

Yes, at tag rugby they do beat them. Also at hockey, football, rounders, climbing, swimming and Athletics. All state primary. I don't think sports defines their school despite it being encouraged, there are also arts clubs, drama, music, choir, yoga, debating, school council, eco warriors etc, all are equally valued

I agree they shouldn't be put up against boys in contact sports from around year 4 onwards

Also in contact rugby (although not in school). My daughters u10 girls rugby team beat the boys team in a friendly last week.

They won’t when it’s contact but that should not be permitted anyway. Are any athletics world records faster or higher or longer for women? Surely who beats who depends on quality of opposition? I’m assuming this is a prep school. Most state schools have little competitive sport at primary level. Needs a teacher to feel passionate about it. Prep schools rarely play state schools at sport.

I prefer primary schools to offer a variety in terms of music, drama, sport and art. A good one will but often everything except sport is pushed to one side. Obviously schools now care so much about results for Sats it stops a broader education that many had 40 years ago. However we do have higher standards in the core subjects for more DC.

Rugby is Mixed until U12. Its only Secondary school when contact isn't permitted in a mixed game.

Yes it's a state primary school.
And yes we compete against both private and state schools in various local sports competitions, barely a week goes by without a team going off on the school minibus to play another school or in a local sports festival.
We have players from a first division football team come in as part of a local sports partnership, and girls football is promoted as much as boys.

At juniors age the girls do better not because they are necessarily faster or stronger, but because they communicate and work better as a team, they tend to defend better and are more strategic in looking for oppurtuinities to score.

And it doesn't have to be either music or sport, can do both. Our choir attends regional events, our drama group performs at the town theatre with other schools. And the schools sats results are strong too.

A state primary with a minibus? I thought those were long gone!

Placemarking.

The outlook in the UK is cold and is not child or family focussed.

I liked the early years framework and had no issue with Reception, as my DC school was play based.

However from year 1 expecting children to sit and write like mini adults is not right for all children. It does not mean they are behind. It meant that they were not ready for formal education. Both DC ended up high achieving so I had no worries about them.

The latter end of Secondary on the hand, needs urgent reform. School should be about finding out your talents and skills and ensuring that every child leaves secondary with functional Maths/English/Citizenship/Health and an understanding of the world they are heading into including how to write CVs, group/individual interviews and what lifelong learning is and how it is beneficial to enter careers and improve wellbeing.

It makes me sad to see the removal of music, art, drama, craft, so early in a child's school life. Those are the little things that make you happy and have the potential to become hobbies in adulthood.

@OnlyTheBravest I don’t think the best schools do remove them - at all. Often they are afternoon activities and they are in the NC - except drama. A good school will build in a Christmas play or concert or similar though.