Page 8 | Should she replace it? Part 3

Langarg · 2025-01-02T19:09:05+00:00

I can’t believe we have a part 3 🤣 this has provided some lighthearted entertainment at a time where I’m feeling really let down by someone I considered a good friend. So thank you! I have posted an update on thread 2, will post it here also. I have sent the following text message ‘Having reflected on what you have said, how the airwrap was lost/broken or otherwise is irrelevant. I considered asking you for pictures of the broken airwrap or asking to speak to your sister to ask her what happened but it will get us nowhere. All that matters is I am down a Dyson airwrap and I want a new replacement. You’ll need to either transfer me the £399 tonight to pay for this or purchase it yourself from boots and send me the email receipt this evening. You can then sort out with your sister whether she is going to contribute to the cost of it. We can then put this behind us’ I have no interest in maintaining the friendship after this for obvious reasons. I am worried that she’s seen the thread (how can she not have 🤣) and knows this fine well so will have no intention of replacing it sadly. I don’t think I’ll ever get the truth (was there even a wedding at this rate?! 🤣) all that matters to me now is getting a replacement airwrap!!!!

kkloo · 02/01/2025 20:34

RedRock41 · 02/01/2025 20:24

@kkloo you don’t need to follow or post if you are so offended? For one so ‘morally outraged’ observe you do seem to be fully up to speed all the same and seem compelled to put your 2p worth in (repeatedly). 😉 OP has nothing to cringe about, most of us think she comes across as a level headed lovely lass, also not fair to victim blame especially whilst continuously hijacking her thread. Maybe start your own… such as - Why oh Why do MumsNet Users Not Appreciate My Moral Superiority!? 🤔

Show quote history

I probably would have left it at the first post except for people kept tagging me...just like you just did.

Victim blame? 😂I think most people in real life understand appropriate consequences and reactions when someone else has done something wrong...and don't say well X did something wrong, therefore it's absolutely fine for Y to behave whatever what they want because they're the 'victim'.

As I said earlier, I certainly hope people aren't teaching their kids that that's how you handle things!!

Pickledpoppetpickle · 02/01/2025 20:34

Wrappingpapere · 02/01/2025 20:30

Are you the “friend”, by any chance?

Three threads in and I’m not adding much more than anyone else, but she should have confessed and bought you a new one right away. Not a second hand one, a new one. That would have been the right thing to do.

Slightly reminds me of the episode in sex and the city where someone steals Carrie’s shoes at her friend’s apartment and then her friend tries to shame her for buying them; then Carrie sends her a gift listing with just those shoes on it.

Show quote history

no love, I'm not. I just don't like the way this went - along with others. In PSHE speak - we're upstanding, rather than bystanding.

Tutorpuzzle · 02/01/2025 20:35

Pickledpoppetpickle · 02/01/2025 20:21

this is just like teenage girls, you know that don't you? Someone does something wrong, struggles to put it right because they just don't have the money to do the right thing (I would guess), and so tries to get round it till such a time as they are able to make it right. The person who has had whatever it is done to them, recruits everyone in the year to back them up. And then when some bystanders ultimately start to feel uncomfortable with the lengths that are being gone to, they are accused of god knows what and are expected to take the 'right' side or face ridicule themselves. It's classic teen.

Show quote history

If someone had stolen £500 (or equivalent goods) from me I’d have called the police. This ‘friend’ is lucky the person she’s stolen from is so patient.

Why are you victim blaming?

LookItsMeAgain · 02/01/2025 20:35

I'm glad you replied tonight and how you replied @Langarg.

I really hope you get a new Air Wrap and the sooner the better

SpringIscomingalso · 02/01/2025 20:36

The fact the thing is still not given back, even if broken and a cheque is not sent or a bank transfer tells you all you need to know about that woman. She has never been a friend and is not a decent human

Original poster

Langarg · 02/01/2025 20:37

IlooklikeNigella · 02/01/2025 20:24

OP I don't love a hysterical pile-on but I don't believe that's what has happened here. Your friend has behaved abominably, you've asserted yourself and you've reported here for support.

Your friend didn't 'make a mistake' like some posters are inferring. She misled you and tried to manipulate you. It's disgusting.

I feel very very bad for you because you will never have a trusting relationship again but that's her fault, not yours.

Thank you, it’s not like me to assert myself if I’m honest and I was feeling pretty good about finally doing so!

For those who said something about how awful it is for our mutual friends to know I’ve embarrassed my friend for posting about this on MN, none of our friends know about this at all. They didn’t know she borrowed the airwrap in the first place and I came to MN to anonymously post about it for advice. The only people who know who me and my friend are, are me, my friend, her sister (if that part of the story is true of course!) and potentially her DH if she has told him.

Anyway, there is still no response from her unfortunately!

OP posts:

Ger1atricMillennial · 02/01/2025 20:37

In summary

You loaned her the air wrap.
She loaned it without permission to a 3rd party.
"The 3rd party broke it" and she didn't feel the need to tell you or apologise and replace? Pull the other one.

My money is still on the fact she or her "sister" still has it.

Get the money OP. Your messages are completely fine, but it's now time to get to the bone. "Money in my account by 5pm on the 6/1 or small claims court".

SpringIscomingalso · 02/01/2025 20:38

If it was me and some of my friends , the matter would be resolved by now, with a honest sorry, I did a mistake, this is your money now or in the next one-two months, end of story

RedRock41 · 02/01/2025 20:39

kkloo · 02/01/2025 20:34

I probably would have left it at the first post except for people kept tagging me...just like you just did.

Victim blame? 😂I think most people in real life understand appropriate consequences and reactions when someone else has done something wrong...and don't say well X did something wrong, therefore it's absolutely fine for Y to behave whatever what they want because they're the 'victim'.

As I said earlier, I certainly hope people aren't teaching their kids that that's how you handle things!!

Show quote history

Better to be thought a fool 👆🏻 than again speak out and remove all doubt 😉…

Wheretostart25 · 02/01/2025 20:39

@Pickledpoppetpickle You do know that absolutely no one other than the OP knows who this person is? It's not impacting this person's job, other friendships, family. This is just an entirely unknown person. It's not like the OP has posted a picture of her with her name and address. She has not given away a single identifiable detail about who the person is.

Stop virtue signalling for the sake of it.

The OP has come across fine. There are people who talk far worse on this forum about close family members and even their own husbands and kids. The OP hasn't come anywhere close to the usual daily character assassinations we see on here.

Pickledpoppetpickle · 02/01/2025 20:40

Tutorpuzzle · 02/01/2025 20:35

If someone had stolen £500 (or equivalent goods) from me I’d have called the police. This ‘friend’ is lucky the person she’s stolen from is so patient.

Why are you victim blaming?

Show quote history

It was fine to start with but it's taken on a life of it's own. Every update is more gleeful.

You're acting like teenage girls.

You can tell I'm looking forward to Monday, eh?!

JustMyView13 · 02/01/2025 20:41

Wheretostart25 · 02/01/2025 20:39

@Pickledpoppetpickle You do know that absolutely no one other than the OP knows who this person is? It's not impacting this person's job, other friendships, family. This is just an entirely unknown person. It's not like the OP has posted a picture of her with her name and address. She has not given away a single identifiable detail about who the person is.

Stop virtue signalling for the sake of it.

The OP has come across fine. There are people who talk far worse on this forum about close family members and even their own husbands and kids. The OP hasn't come anywhere close to the usual daily character assassinations we see on here.

[Sarcasm] Not strictly true. It’s potentially narrowed down to just those with beautifully air wrapped hair on NYE 🫣🤭

For the record, totally on OP’s side here.
#Airwrapgate

republicofjam · 02/01/2025 20:42

kkloo · 02/01/2025 20:18

Yes majority support among a select group of people who live for this kind of thread.

In the real world many would think the OP came across very badly posting it all online.

I certainly hope no one is teaching their kids that this is how you handle issues with your friends even if you're cutting them out.
Assertiveness and advocating for yourself...all good.

Becoming ridiculously childish and petty says more about you than it does about the other person.

Edited

Show quote history

It's sweet of you to care about how the OP is coming across to "the real world" but judging from comments everywhere I think she'll be just fine.

Maybe save your concern for the reputation of the person refusing to return £500 worth of property kindly lent to her weeks ago.

Really hope nobody is teaching their children that this is how you treat your friends after they have done you a massive favour.

TwentySecondsLeft · 02/01/2025 20:43

@Langarg

Am I right in thinking she first told you the air wrap has been left at the venue?

So that was a lie.

And then she continued this lie by saying she was going to drive to the venue to check, and that your persistence was taking the shine off her wedding.

So she didn’t drive there at all and then decided to tell you it was broken…

I think - for anyone defending the wedding air wrap friend, this behaviour is outrageous!

Its the lack of honesty and manipulation tactics!!

Wheretostart25 · 02/01/2025 20:43

JustMyView13 · 02/01/2025 20:41

[Sarcasm] Not strictly true. It’s potentially narrowed down to just those with beautifully air wrapped hair on NYE 🫣🤭

For the record, totally on OP’s side here.
#Airwrapgate

Show quote history

😂true

Calamitousness · 02/01/2025 20:44

@Langarg as you say, the friendship
is over, so you have nothing to lose. It’s time to send her a formal letter to her home address to detail your intent to take her to small claims court. Send it signed on delivery and keep a copy of the letter and the tracking showing received. Download all texts/messages regarding the air wrap as evidence that she acknowledges borrowing it and being careless with it and not returning it. I would imagine you will do well at small claims court if it comes to it.

PanettoneSoprano · 02/01/2025 20:48

Hang on, just need to get comfy...

SpringIscomingalso · 02/01/2025 20:49

Calamitousness · 02/01/2025 20:44

@Langarg as you say, the friendship
is over, so you have nothing to lose. It’s time to send her a formal letter to her home address to detail your intent to take her to small claims court. Send it signed on delivery and keep a copy of the letter and the tracking showing received. Download all texts/messages regarding the air wrap as evidence that she acknowledges borrowing it and being careless with it and not returning it. I would imagine you will do well at small claims court if it comes to it.

Either that , either just let her go - this is what she wants. I am curious which way you are chosing , poster. Useless to have your well being eaten up by such a person for a very long time

LondonLady15 · 02/01/2025 20:49

You posted anonymously for support OP and haven’t identified your ‘friend’ in any way. Do not feel guilty at all.
i would be prepared as others have said that there will be another excuse or lie incoming.

Your friendship is over so I agree that small claims will be the best way forward on this.

DowntheDrainpipe · 02/01/2025 20:50

kkloo · 02/01/2025 19:36

She was cheeky but I personally wouldn't throw away a friendship over this, or even I didn't want to be friends anymore I wouldn't make this all the worse by posting everything on MN, you're coming across as very childish and petty here all for the sake of getting a little dopamine boost from some randoms on MN that you don't even know.

Oh you wouldn’t throw away a friendship over a friend stealing your Dyson? Cool. I could do with a new friend. Send me a Dyson and I’ll consider it.

Honestly, there are some stupidly comments on Mumsnet but this one really does take the biscuit. 🍪

Mugcake · 02/01/2025 20:50

I'm so invested in this! 😂
Hope you manage to get a new one from the CF

WeightLossGoal2024 · 02/01/2025 20:51

She needs to Klarna (or whatever) to
Replace your hairdryer!

SpringIscomingalso · 02/01/2025 20:51

By the way the cheeky f-r friend keeps the lies coming, and knowing ( for sure) she is on mumsnet, seems she has decided not to pay back.

FunkyMonks · 02/01/2025 20:52

Op I fully agree with you what your so called friend has done is beyond disgusting behaviour any decent friend would have immediately replaced your Dyson or given you the money.

I also do think her stories she's given you are bullshit and another way of dragging this out in hope you give up I wouldn't be surprised if she blocks you soon.

It's horrible that your the one out of pocket for doing a nice thing for a so called friend, I do hope that she does the decent thing and gives you the money buy it as soon as it lands your account incase she tries to retract the payment wouldn't surprise me someone doing this or claiming credit card fraud she seems the sort given the antics she's already displayed throughout this whole drama.

It's sad to say but when you do get a replacement never lend it to anyone ever again not even a small non expensive item some people just don't understand the cost of things these days or have respect for other people's belongings.

DowntonNabby · 02/01/2025 20:52

Do not feel guilty at all! There's been no pile on, just lots of comments expressing outrage on your behalf that this so-called friend has lied and lied and lied about the fact she's lost/damaged/sold an item of yours worth £500. How anyone could possibly defend her behaviour is beyond me.