Should she replace it? Part 2

[Langarg]

Starting the new thread ahead of hopefully having an update soon!

the police probably wouldn’t do anything but you would get a crime ref number so someone could claim on insurance? Of course this is all nonsense because it hasn’t been stolen……

I don't think she's broken it. If she had, she could come clean and go from there in arranging to pay for a repair or replacement; plus it would put her in a sympathetic light.

I reckon it's still fully intact and working - she just either wants to keep it, or to keep the money she got for selling it.

Genuine - even foolish - accidents are met with much more sympathy (even if they do have to be made good eventually) than simple deliberate theft.

All this talk of the police has reminded me that when I did leave my Dyson hairdryer in the hotel and it mysteriously disappeared (explained in my previous post) I actually did contact the police who were lovely and agreed it clearly was a theft. Obviously they didn't bother trying to track down a hairdryer thief, but they did give me a crime reference number which meant that I could claim off my travel insurance. I didn't get the full amount but it went some way towards replacing it. If you genuinely think it may have been stolen by hotel staff/guests rather than your friend you could go down this route of your friend has travel insurance she can claim on.

It's a very sad state of affairs if the police are no longer 'interested' in thefts of goods.

Where will it end: will they start to ignore murder if you've 'only' killed one person, and just focus their efforts on the serial killers?

Agree that the police are unlikely to be interested, however it does mean you can get a crime reference number and potentially make a claim… and mentioning that you’d like a crime reference number/the matter reported to the police is about waking the CF friend up the fact that she has dug a seriously deep hole for herself if she is fibbing (for whatever reason).

If she has the ability to sell her ‘friend’s expensive property, that is clearly valued by her friend, and just not say anything by way of explanation after she’d borrowed it to explain why she wants returning it straight away - that clearly shows the level of respect she has for OP. But it goes beyond that, bc, even tho most of us wouldn’t as to borrow such an item from an acquaintance or someone we hardly knew at all, our instinct would presumably be to return it or explain why it was not forthcoming - bc that’s the adult and respectful way of behaving. This woman has such a low level of respect for OP that it reminds me of a teenaged sibling relationship where there is no respect whatsoever and the old adage - what’s yours is mine, what’s mine’s my own applies.

Its unbelievable that she would conduct herself this way - unless something has happened that is so dramatic - like her new husband having an affair - which could possibly explain why she has been so distracted from the priority she should have had of not just returning the hair appliance, but thanking OP profusely for lending it to her in the first place. She clearly wanted to hang on to it for NYE celebrations if she still has it, and OP’s newfound assertiveness has thrown her. Her behaviour is a kickback at meek, predictable OP challenging and confronting her and she is dragging it out for as long as possible to retain some kind of control.

Or she has given it to someone as a xmas present/ sold/ loaned it to a friend who has broken it and she’ll be buggered if she’s paying for a brand new one to replace it.

I hope she sold it for half price to make a bit of £ and will now have to shell out twice that. People like her are frightening bc they have no loyalty or moral compass - it’s bad to a stranger but even worse to take advantage of someone you claim is a friend like that. She’s a user and manipulator and probably doesn’t think of other ppl as friends, they’re just enablers to her.

Thank goodness you learned what she is really like, OP, before something even worse happened with her.

Still can’t get my head round her blaming you for taking the shine off the wedding (which happened weeks ago!!!!) You hardly had a go at her the next day! Unbelievable.

Sorry this is so long - like many others this has made me rather 😱😡😤 on your behalf! ☺️

100% agree. If a £500 item was left in an hotel room and wasn’t handed in by the staff member who found it, they’ve stolen it. That means the hotel have a thieving staff member, which they should want to deal with. It gives them a bad reputation if guests accidentally leaving expensive items in rooms have them stolen.

Thefts should always be reported to the police, to obtain a crime number. Even if they don’t have the resources to investigate, it provides a pattern of data, which can lead to criminals being caught. Sometimes more serious criminals. Crime numbers are also needed for insurance claims.

The ‘friend’ should expect to give a statement to both the hotel and the police about where the item was left and how soon it was before she realised she’d left it and notified the hotel. If she’s actually taken it, that’ll be an uncomfortable and risky thing for her to do, I.e. false statement to police.

I suspect she’s sold it. I’d be very wary of any replacement she gives the OP, she clearly isn’t trustworthy.

If she says she bought you a new one, tell her you also require a copy of the receipt for it.

I left a change bag in a trolley at asda. As became my way with a baby, this had nappies but also my cards, cash, phone etc. I went back to Asda and it was nowhere to be found.

It later turned out it was in their safe!!! I had described it as a nappy bag so they looked in lost property, meanwhile another member of staff had treated it as a handbag and put it in the safe.

My prediction is the air wrap is at the hotel in a Schrödinger's cat type situation and it's just crossed wires and lack of communication. I am a bit too trusting and believe the best in people. I also now want an air wrap.

I’m still confused about the driving to the hotel. I’d want to know:

• When did she realise she’d left it in the hotel?
• When did she contact the hotel to explain this and ask if it was there?
• If the hotel said it hadn’t been handed it, what did they suggest doing about it and
• If they said there was nothing they could do, did she make a complaint of theft to the hotel via their complaints procedure?

There’s no need to drive there. Can all be done by email/phone calls.

Happy New Year - I’m also invested and desperate to find out what happens next!

OP - if you haven’t phoned the hotel by now I think you should ring them and see if they have it. You have given your friend ample opportunity to investigate that route and she appears to be reluctant so I’d just ring them now - say you were doing it to save her a wasted journey in the bad weather - but I don’t think you’d owe her any explanation anyway - you’re well within your right to phone them as it is your property that has been lost

At this point, I hope she mysteriously 'finds' it in the car 'under something'. Or perhaps the bag 'matched' the colour of the boot lining in the car.

Can't believe she's not resolved this by now, and yet, I can.

She did this.

What do you think they should have done? Interviewed the dozen people who could have been in the room? And then what?

The OP did call the hotel who said they had no record of such an incident. Now it could be that the staff member OP spoke to didn’t check properly to see, or CF was lying about saying the hotel couldn’t find it.

Have you checked out pictures of the hotel online to confirm that their carpets are the same colour as the package?

What a disgraceful person. Even if it was an honest mistake, the way she has treated you has been apalling. I hope she sees the DM article and gets a dose of shame.

Have you asked her why she thinks this is anyone else’s fault? Or why she thinks you should be the one out of pocket? She has essentially asked to hold £500 of yours and then lost if, shrugged and told you to stop making you feel bad for losing it.

They’re too busy terrorising people who say naughty things on social media to deal with silly things like theft, or even burglaries or assault.

I’d be setting solid boundaries down at this point. If you haven’t had a reply by say, 5pm, I would be sending a ‘I’m disappointed in you’ text that states you’ve given her x amount of days and she’s repeatedly given different excuses, so you’re now calling the hotel again, lodging it with the police to get a crime number, and issuing her with a claims court notice.

The CF borrowed it. If she left it at the hotel it is on her to chase it. The op just wants the item. If the CF buys a replacement (as she should have by now) the deed is done. If she finds the original then she can keep it or sell to recoup the costs. No excuses/drunken posts needed. It's not a 1.99 item. OP out by 500. Replace it, job done.

The hotel would have definitely looked into it. They take pride on this stuff.

Any reputable hotel hosting weddings (if they did host it not sure) would be mortified and do all they can to help.

I just massively doubt they would say not here okay bye!

If it helps, at some point in the coming messages you could give her an out by saying "have you looked everywhere in the car? It probably slid under a seat"...

So she can "find" it and hand it over. As per my last suggestion, I'd still block her after!