My mother has asked this - this is surely unreasonable

[BarrioQueen]

My mother and stepfather are due to be seeing in New Year with her sister and husband (my Aunt) friends in a pretty holiday cottage in the Lake District - it is fairly remote apparently. The cottage - not stayed in before is much nearer to them than my Aunt who lives a long drive away. They are staying a week.
My Mum isn't great at technology - so paid my Aunt half by cheque and my Aunt booked it. However my Aunt has not yet sent any details of how to find the cottage, address etc. Though my Mother does know the name of the village it is in. Apparently my Mum has sent her 4 messages or phone calls (requesting this info) soon after Christmas but the information has not been forthcoming and my step father understandably is wishing they'd not booked.

My Mum is asking me to contact my Aunt - I've sent her a text asking for the info - on how to get into the cottage and address but despite a long message all about the joys of Christmas no info has been forthcoming. I don't see the holiday cottage giving this info to the person who is not on the booking form as they would surely revert this back to the booking person - as I had thought of telling my Mum to contact them.
My Aunt is a bit of Primadonna - but really she's being unreasonable isn't she? Presumably there must be some reason why she is 'gate keeping' this info? My Mum is worried about driving in the dark, and concerned that she won't be able to access the cottage until after her sister arrives. Her sister has form for arriving to events really late - she missed my wedding service for example.
I guess I have answered this question - but aside from telling my Mum never to arrange a cottage booking with them again, how should she proceed? My Aunt seems to be being deliberately obstructive? My Aunt is not picking up the phone, and being unspecific in messages. Grrr. I'm going to stay out of this and maybe end up with my Mum for new Year!
This is bizarre behaviour isn't it???

Did not realise, I thought in the New year meant January. I just would not go in that case. I should have read it properly

This is what i was thinking. And also that she may not have received the entry codes yet.

I think the aunt has been scammed and she’s trying to sort it out without anyone knowing

Phone again. Leave a form voice message if she doesn't answer and a firm text message. Does your aunt have children? Contact them too and ask them to help.

Are they arriving today? It’s quite normal to not release addresses for holiday lets until just before the booking opens (say 24 hours before). If they are arriving today, yes, it sounds quite stressful and your aunt should hopefully have this information already. If they are meant to arrive tomorrow though, it’s very possible it hasn’t been sent yet, though it would be sensible of her to actually say that.

But why wouldn’t you just say that if that was the case?

Of course she shouldn’t blow up the relationship. But if she has booked and paid to celebrate NYE then that is what she should do.

Find but she should say that, not ignore all texts and calls!

It seems kind of weird that people who want to spend NYE together can’t communicate on this basic level, don’t talk on the phone etc.

I know it’s a retro idea, but can the respective husbands maybe be encouraged to talk to each other?

You mentioned friends in your OP, was that a typo or is anyone else joining apart from the two sisters?

Is aunt alive and well?

Is 70 elderly? I hope not. Just turned 62 and hoping not to be elderly in 8 years! Currently go to festivals, run half marathons, work long hours etc.

I can imagine that (I'm not stupid), but I still think it's sad to not to want to spend time with your mum (whatever the reason, it's sad).

Oh well - good job no one was asking you to then isn’t it!

yes but point was if she doesn’t want to drive there in the dark on NYE or be sat around waiting outside for sister to arrive, and if it’s becoming stressful, then it would be a shame to lose a whole week’s holiday just for the sake of NYE.

Its fairly common with sites like Airbnb to only get the exact address on making the balance of payments and the entry i structions/codes only on the day itself. But yes your aunt's stonewalling is weird.

Has your Aunt cashed the cheque and not booked it? I’d phone the company and pretend to be the Aunt and see if it’s booked.

Jeez Louise I wish I could delete my post, everyone is getting their knickers in a right twist.

Has your mum only paid for half her part?

You could suggest your parents travel the day after they had intended so they can travel in the light and makes a bit of a point to the aunt.

I think the reactions on this thread are totally overblown. What ever happened to trusting someone? If the DM knows the village then that is sufficient to plan the timings and stops on the journey. Just put the postcode of the village shop or pub into Google maps. The aunt seems pretty scatty but I imagine she will send the full details through tonight. As long as the DM has the postcode and directions before departure, surely it will all be fine? She was happy enough for her sister to make the booking, so she therefore has to go with her style of arrangements.

There are many ways of doing things in life and sometimes we just have to accept that other people do things differently to ourselves.

Have you actually heard for your aunt at all lately? Just wondered if she is unwell or something,

Is the cottage showing as booked on websites ?

Because it was irrelevant and insensitive.

Maybe she doesn’t have all the details yet? Airbnb doesn’t provide full detail until a few hours before on the day.

but I don’t get why she can’t just say that.

I'd just tell your mum to stay ar home with her partner and relax . If and when the aunt calls your mother should say she didn't hear so made other plans . It can be a lesson to your aunt to treat others with kindness and respect