My mother has asked this - this is surely unreasonable

[BarrioQueen]

My mother and stepfather are due to be seeing in New Year with her sister and husband (my Aunt) friends in a pretty holiday cottage in the Lake District - it is fairly remote apparently. The cottage - not stayed in before is much nearer to them than my Aunt who lives a long drive away. They are staying a week.
My Mum isn't great at technology - so paid my Aunt half by cheque and my Aunt booked it. However my Aunt has not yet sent any details of how to find the cottage, address etc. Though my Mother does know the name of the village it is in. Apparently my Mum has sent her 4 messages or phone calls (requesting this info) soon after Christmas but the information has not been forthcoming and my step father understandably is wishing they'd not booked.

My Mum is asking me to contact my Aunt - I've sent her a text asking for the info - on how to get into the cottage and address but despite a long message all about the joys of Christmas no info has been forthcoming. I don't see the holiday cottage giving this info to the person who is not on the booking form as they would surely revert this back to the booking person - as I had thought of telling my Mum to contact them.
My Aunt is a bit of Primadonna - but really she's being unreasonable isn't she? Presumably there must be some reason why she is 'gate keeping' this info? My Mum is worried about driving in the dark, and concerned that she won't be able to access the cottage until after her sister arrives. Her sister has form for arriving to events really late - she missed my wedding service for example.
I guess I have answered this question - but aside from telling my Mum never to arrange a cottage booking with them again, how should she proceed? My Aunt seems to be being deliberately obstructive? My Aunt is not picking up the phone, and being unspecific in messages. Grrr. I'm going to stay out of this and maybe end up with my Mum for new Year!
This is bizarre behaviour isn't it???

Really depends on your mum though, doesn’t it? Some are lovely. Some are not. Some are okay in small doses; and it’s just been Christmas, so that may already be used up.

If she doesn't answer the phone ring back witholding your number.

Maybe your aunt hasn't got the info yet? I booked a cottage earlier this year and had absolutely no information sent to me. When I contacted the company they said they didn't send out any information until 48 hours beforehand. It got to 48 hours beforehand, still nothing so I contacted them again. They said oh you will definitely have the details shortly. I did get the information eventually, literally two hours before we set off. That was a very reputable holiday cottage company that loads of people book with all the time. I began to think I had made a mistake and hadn't booked but I knew I had paid and could see on the online booking calender that the property was booked out for my days so I knew I wasn't going mad but it was stressful.

Your aunt is being a dick. You could ring withholding your number or suggest to your mum she travels up the next day if the info arrives too late.

But I'd message aunt, hi mum is worried about travelling in the dark /finding cottage. If you haven't let her know by X time she will come down the next day.

If she doesn’t have the info then she could have just said they haven’t released the details to her yet.

There's no need to ignore any mention of the holiday.

Bizarre behaviour by your aunt. I'd say that your mum needs the info as it's making her anxious, and if it's not forthcoming I'd be cancelling.

Agree with pps - she's not booked it. 😬

Don't be that twat person in future. Don't you think people like to look at where they will be going to and the area, places of interest etc?

It takes SECONDS to write the address or postcode. You know you have form for forgetting (repeatedly) to send the info so be a decent person and send it immediately on booking (that way you won't forget will you).

If you find it all too onerous let someone else do the booking and leave YOU in the dark.

This ^

Call her from a withheld number. Stick 141 in front of her number before you call.

But the information will presumably be available via your phone. Don't you know where your phone is?

This. I think she doesn’t want your dp’s getting there first as she sees it as “her” trip or some such weirdness.

Just reading this post and imagining I were in this situation, feels stressful.

In your mom's place I'd be demanding that money back and never plan to do anything with your flaky aunt again.

When going on holiday or away for a break I like to have all the information at hand, it adds to my anxiety and really stresses me out, making me unwell if I don’t have that control of knowing the details, hence why it’s normally me that books things.

if I were your mum, I’d either phone or message one last time saying that I need the information by 6pm tonight or I expect the money to be refunded into my bank account by then as unless I know the details I’m not going.

DM needs to decide if she wants to go on holiday with a dickhead who will cash a cheque but refuse to give any further information about the holiday.

I'd maybe suggest to your mum that she needs to double check her spam folder on her email just in case it's in there, and then choose, it's not your job to sort this out.

I'd just assume it's not going to happen. Just send a text saying please return the money, it's probably best the break isn't happening due to the weather.

I think I would call aunt's bluff and tell her your Mum can no longer go and see if that panics her into releasing information!

I think the week away is doomed now anyway - even if the Aunt does finally share the details, how is it going to be possible to share a lovely holiday when she has behaved like this?

I think I'd be finding somewhere else last minute, or deciding to stay home...if your mum takes herself out of the game then your Aunt can't play it...

@BarrioQueen if it is an AirBnB booking then your mum will need her own AirBnB account to be added as a guest to the booking. Then she will be able to see all the details.

Has your mum's cheque been cashed? If not, aunt probably couldn't be bothered booking something. If it has, she might be doing a runner with your mum's money.
Maybe aunt has invited someone else to join her instead of your mum.
Whatever the reason, it's very strange behaviour and OOO.

I think people are being a bit OTT, and I’m sure your auntie has it booked. If your mum doesn’t want to drive in the dark or wait around, why doesn’t she have a quiet NYE at home and drive up the next day when presumably they will have arrived? She’ll still have most of a week’s holiday to enjoy.

Now why on earth would she do this!? She has paid for it, and obviously wants to celebrate NYE there?

I would message again saying either give me the address in an hour, or return the money. WTF is this behaviour?

I'd give my aunt one last opportunity to respond with the details - all of them including the name of the company she booked through and whether there may be unexpected expenses (such as a fee for gas/electricity/heating or similar that hasn't been included in the initial fee for staying) and say to her that if she doesn't reply by 8pm tonight, you will be completing the forms to bring her to the Small Claims Court (you don't want to but you will) as you can see that the cheque she was sent has been cashed.

It's unacceptable to withhold this information.

Did something happen at Christmas ? Was your Aunt excluded or given last minute details ? This seems like some kind of classic passive aggressive revenge payback.