Any torch shining in my eyes will hurt, no matter how brief. It may pass after a few minutes, or it will give me a headache behind the eye for a few hours, or if I’m really lucky, it will lead to a full blown, debilitating migraine. (Someone slinging my brain, throwing up, slurring my words and numb arms for a few hours, unable to tolerate any light. ) I avoid all torches, I HATE the cyclists that wear flashing head lamps. It should be illegal to use strobe lighting on the road.
I can’t tolerate fireworks or all the flashing toys that are sold at fireworks displays. If I don’t get a migraine, the anxiety of getting one is enough to put me in a bad mood.
I shut my eyes when there are torches around. I shut my eyes at camera flashes on the TV or any kind of flashing as it hurts and might lead to a migraine. When the flashing is really intense, I have to also put my hand over my closed eyes to stop the flashing confusing my brain.
I don’t generally lash out at people accidentally shining lights in my eyes, but occasionally, I do have less patience and I might not respond as well as I could, but that is fear and anxiety taking over.
I struggle with night daylight. I hate how it flashes through hedges, particularly in winter, as you move along. I am so sensitive to light. My pupils take forever to constrict.
I fully appreciate that I am the extreme and most people don’t experience light sensitivity to this extent, but as with everything, it’s a spectrum.
On the other hand, I know I have a really high pain threshold, but I don’t disregard when other people claim something hurts. Most people say labour is painful, I gave birth twice without the need for any medication. I don’t see those who need pain relief as weak, or minimise their difficulties, because to them, their pain is real.
In that moment, so was your husband’s. Maybe he said what he did because he wanted to make a point that it had hurt, not to make you feel guilty, but to realise.