Partner not wanting sex while I am pregnant

[Motherof1and2dogs]

Just wanted to see what everyone thinks about the above. My husband is fully aware I am writing this by the way, but I am curious to see what others think so we can sit down and read together your replies, either I need to respect his feelings or he needs to respect mine (by the way this is not an argument, we have been joking around about the situation but he is 100% serious) so he refuses to have sex with me as soon as I start to show my bump, he gets really freaked out about the thought of having sex when I am pregnant, I can kind of sympathise as it must be a bit strange, but how can we both go the next 6.5 months without sex 😫 I mean he seems fine with it but I'm not. I am not an addict in anyway, but I think at least 1-2 times a month is healthy for your relationship. I do think it will affect me not being able to do it for such a long time in terms of self esteem as well as the emotional side of it, and then when baby is here it will probably be even longer after that!

Has anyone else been in a similar situation? Should I respect how he feels and just deal with it? Should he just build up the courage and have sex with me while pregnant? Sorry for so much information but just interested to see what people say, maybe some comments may help me or him with the situation. Thanks in advance! :)

Your theory is bollocks.

Exactly the same for me. As soon as I got a positive test, my husband wouldn’t go anywhere near me. It made me feel so insecure, ugly, round. Just a vessel for a baby. It did really mess with me.

We were the opposite, I had zero desire to have sex this time when I was pregnant. First time we continued as normal. But my OH was so supportive of my decision, even though he really really wanted to have sex. I really don't think it's fair to ask him to suck it up and have sex with you if he doesn't want to.

Have you started showing yet and has this started already? Because if it hasn't, it may take some time for your husband to notice you are showing. He sees you every day and you aren't going to wake up one morning with a massive bump.

Yeah dh couldn't have sex once I began to show properly but I was more like 25 plus weeks with the first. Don't remember it being an issue tbh as it was a temp thing. With subsequent dc it was earlier as I was bigger but I was running around after a toddler so I really was not fussed.

We reverted back just fine once I was recovered from birth

Ask him is he’s happy for you to go elsewhere to get sorted and have a non-monogamous relationship until he finds your body attractive again.

There’s an absolute tsunami of men who find pregnant women incredibly attractive and sexy and won’t hesitate to help you out.

Jesus christ! He didn't say he wasn't going to find her attractive!!! What a disgusting comment. If a woman didn't want sex, would you be recommending that she allow her husband fuck someone else for a few months until her desire came back? Thankfully my OH was supportive of my decision to not have sex during pregnancy, he didn't go looking for a hall pass!

Same. He understood why I didn’t want sex and respected it. As you’d expect from your life partner.

Has this already happened or is this a concern for when you do get pregnant?

My DH didn't think he'd want sex with me while pregnant/with a bump.

Ended up a non-issue. Had sex when allowed to do so (pregnancy complications) including over 41 weeks pregnant trying to get baby out 🤣 had far more sex while pregnant than since arrival.

No he won't, he doesn't have to give you back massages as some sort of punishment

I would be really hurt by this. I had sex through all my pregnancies. Tell him to bend you over, pop it in and get it done 😂

That's disgusting. He doesn't want sex.

I wish my husband would lose some of his ridiculous sex drive when km pregnant

Of course! But problems regarding sex in a relationship cannot just be brushed off with that. Sex is very important for connection - it is something that needs to take in consideration both parties needs and desires.

I’d find his attitude very immature and a turn off. A basic knowledge of a woman’s anatomy would dispel any myths of his dick touching the baby if that’s what he’s bothered about 🙄. It seems very natural to me for a man to be proud of his pregnant wife and find her attractive - mine certainly does despite the weight gain.

There’s just something about this that would make me feel a bit off and I’d be wondering if he’d be feeling the same when you’re a mum and perhaps breastfeeding. It makes me think of a teenage boy going “ew gross”.

Tell him to bend you over, pop it in and get it done

Is not going to solve problems re sex in a relationship

It’s not for ever. Surely anyone can manage without sex for a few months?

If someone spoke to me like that the bedroom I'd be out of there. It's not a joke to basically tell someone who doesn't want sex to get on with it

Of course, but I’d be upset if my husband made me feel unattractive and not desired during something as life changing as pregnancy.

Going without sex, for me, is really bad for my mental health. Some can go without it, some it affects more than others.

I beg your pardon?

Don’t let the door hit you on the way out.

What is your problem?