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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think this is just rude on christmas Day

84 replies

Lucyy97 · 25/12/2024 18:55

To invite your daughter and grand daughter round then walk dog twice and spend over 2 and half hours upstairs in bed ?

OP posts:
MaggieBsBoat · 25/12/2024 18:56

YANBU. Just don’t bother. Don’t invite people.

CombatBarbie · 25/12/2024 18:56

Erm yes....how long are you supposed to be there for and who else is there?

Mashroom · 25/12/2024 18:57

Very strange behaviour

MooseAndSquirrelLoveFlannel · 25/12/2024 18:58

Yes, it's rude but more than that it's also very odd.

TwinklyAmberOrca · 25/12/2024 18:58

Walking the dog twice is normal surely but 2.5 hours upstairs in bed is odd.

Wolframandhart · 25/12/2024 18:58

Your parents? Just leave. Or walk the dog with them.

Upstartled · 25/12/2024 18:59

Is your dm the only other person who is there?

Lucyy97 · 25/12/2024 18:59

No set time. My brother was here but he’s gone out. It’s my dad, he’s just retreated away. My mum and dad invited us here today, me and DD age 5. Seemed a long dog walk and then he spent an hour and half in bed after and then came down for not very long, walked dog again and has since been in bed for another hour

OP posts:
ByHeartyCyanMentor · 25/12/2024 19:00

Well the dog needs two walks a day.
The going to bed is a bit peculiar though.

ItOnlyTakesTwoMinutes · 25/12/2024 19:00

Lucyy97 · 25/12/2024 18:59

No set time. My brother was here but he’s gone out. It’s my dad, he’s just retreated away. My mum and dad invited us here today, me and DD age 5. Seemed a long dog walk and then he spent an hour and half in bed after and then came down for not very long, walked dog again and has since been in bed for another hour

Maybe your Dads depressed?

Lucyy97 · 25/12/2024 19:00

ByHeartyCyanMentor · 25/12/2024 19:00

Well the dog needs two walks a day.
The going to bed is a bit peculiar though.

He does but seemed a long walk, seems like he’s avoiding being around us

OP posts:
HoppityBun · 25/12/2024 19:01

It’s strange not to say anything about it, but a DGM probably is tired and needs a nap. What’s odd is not saying “ ‘scuse me, but I need a nap” or for the DD to ask “can you bring you some tea?” or “what would you like us to do this evening” or “are you ok?” You don’t seem to know each other very well or to like each other

Randomlygeneratedname · 25/12/2024 19:01

Is your mum there too and spending time with you? Maybe he isn't feeling well and taking the dog out is taking it out of him.

Lucyy97 · 25/12/2024 19:01

ItOnlyTakesTwoMinutes · 25/12/2024 19:00

Maybe your Dads depressed?

Possible but he’s never shown anything like this before

OP posts:
BunsenBurnerBaby · 25/12/2024 19:02

How old is he? Entirely normal for our parents (80+) as can’t cope with lots of noise/people/stimulation so much any more.

Lucyy97 · 25/12/2024 19:02

he hasn’t said about feeling not feeling well or anything, hasn’t said much

OP posts:
Createausername1970 · 25/12/2024 19:02

Maybe things aren't great between your parents?

Lucyy97 · 25/12/2024 19:02

BunsenBurnerBaby · 25/12/2024 19:02

How old is he? Entirely normal for our parents (80+) as can’t cope with lots of noise/people/stimulation so much any more.

He is 57

OP posts:
Lucyy97 · 25/12/2024 19:04

Createausername1970 · 25/12/2024 19:02

Maybe things aren't great between your parents?

Everything seems ok with them. It’s not so much my mum he’s avoiding. Seems like he’s avoiding just Christmas in general or being with us

OP posts:
xyz111 · 25/12/2024 19:04

Have you asked him what's up?

ByHeartyCyanMentor · 25/12/2024 19:04

ItOnlyTakesTwoMinutes · 25/12/2024 19:00

Maybe your Dads depressed?

This is a good point or any number of physical or mental illnesses.

Lucyy97 · 25/12/2024 19:05

xyz111 · 25/12/2024 19:04

Have you asked him what's up?

Yeah well he swore under his breath a few times for some unknown reason. Huffing and puffing about something. Maybe in a bad mood but it’s made the day a bit ..

OP posts:
TibetanTea · 25/12/2024 19:06

I think we need a bit more context - what's his personality usually like? Your relationship with him etc?

Gunpowder · 25/12/2024 19:09

He’s family so I’d ask. I’d say, ‘I’ve noticed you aren’t your usual self today, what’s up?’

Ponderingwindow · 25/12/2024 19:21

For whatever reason, he is taking the space he needs to get through the day. You should respect that rather than trying to make him feel
guilty.

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