Annoyed at DD's friends birthday party on Christmas Eve

[ShabbaRAnkzz]

DD has been invited to her friends birthday party tomorrow (Christmas Eve). It's from 12-4 and parents have been asked to attend / stay with the children.
This takes out a block of Christmas Eve when I've got so much other stuff I need to do.
Its one of my daughters clotest friends so I will need to attend.
AIBU to this it's a very inconvenient time?

Many Children who have birthdays around Christmas get shortchanged. Not having it on the day, people being thoughtless. Little things like Christmas wrapping paper can be very hurtful. She is still so young so well done for giving her your time. I think a lot of selfish people are dismissing that she is still such a little girl.

My daughter is a Twelfth Night baby. She has had gifts clearly a Christmas present reject, quite often too old or too young for her. Christmas wrapping, sale stickers a scratched off and one person saying she did not get her a present as she had probably had a lot for Christmas.

I think this is on you for not planning better assuming you haven’t just found out about this.

I have a Christmas baby. We would never have held their party this close to Xmas. Ridiculous. It took one attempt, when the only RSVPs were refusals, for us to realise that it just doesn't work. We always celebrated their birthday simply, just family, on the actual day, and threw them a proper party in June.

But if you've committed to going, then, yes, you should go.

I agree the weekend before would have been better for a party. Christmas Eve is convenient for very very few people

Yes we would have rsvp'd our regrets for any xmas eve invitation. Not dropped out after accepting.

@Aparecium

You have a Christmas baby and you give them their party in June ????

Sorry but who on earth do you think you are dictating that a CHILD shouldn’t be having a birthday party on their actual birthday?

It’s not mandatory by law. You don’t have to attend. If 4 hours early afternoon is such an inconvenience for you then tell the parents you’re sorry, but you and your DD won’t be attending. It’s not rocket science, and there doesn’t need to be drama. You don’t even need to stay the whole 4 hours, show your face, let your DD play with her friends for an hour and then get going.

I just hope the Birthday child’s mother doesn’t see this awful thread.

How is OP dictating? She hasn’t called the mum
to move it.

Four hours is a long party!

OP, can you hire a sitter to go with your child? That way your child has supervision, and you get a few hours to yourself to do running around. Seems like a fair solution, maybe a bit late to organize.

With small children many venues insist on a certain adult child ratio for insurance purposes. Additionally you’re quite likely to miss seeing your own birthday child’s enjoyment or respond to their needs if having to look after everyone else’s. …. Still bitter about missing birthday cake moment for youngest child on 19th escorted visit to lavatory …

When my daughter was in about year 3, a little girl had a party on Christmas eve in the local village hall. Her parents had put on a lovely do, massively (over) catered knowing that on Christmas eve there may be extra siblings, cousins etc. My daughter was the ONLY child who came despite about 30 positive RSVPs. I was absolutely heartbroken for them all!

Christmas birthdays get so overlooked, it may be inconvenient for people but maybe next year just be aware that there may be a birthday party to attend and plan accordingly

Well OP clearly didn't think it through either. If you know Christmas Eve is busy for you then you turn the invite down or say you are going for 2 hours, not complain about it on MN.
Although how much can you really have left to do? IRL I don't know anyone who leaves everything until Christmas Eve.
I mean you have to go now (but not for the full 4 hours) but next time think about if Christmas Eve works for you and if not decline. On the plus side it might help tire her out a bit.

Haha
No way woukd I be taking 5 hours or more (party+travel to/from & getting ready) out of the middle of Christmas Eve to take a child to a birthday party.
I would have said no on receiving the invite

I had a friend whose child's birthday was Christmas Eve and she always had people drop out. I made sure I never did. We knew the party tike and could easily arrange everything else that needed doing around it

If this child is a close friend of yours don't let them down. It will be appreciated.

No one’s being unreasonable. It’s really difficult for kids who have Christmas-time birthdays and you’ve already said yes.

It’s likely that a lot of kids won’t turn up so please don’t let her down as well.

Next year they should have the birthday party earlier than the 24th because many people are already visiting/hosting family by that date and extra birthday parties will be ignored.

What else were you planning on doing that can't be shifted to somewhere else over Christmas?
Maybe I'm bias, but we spent many a Christmas eve afternoon at the neighbour's, celebrating their daughter's birthday. It was always a lovely afternoon. We knew it was happening, so did the shopping on the 23rd, made sure everything was wrapped. Everything else happened on the 25th.
It was also really important to us to allow the child (with a birthday of the 25th) a proper bit of birthday time.

she's bitching about the timing here and it is impossible to judge because she won't admit she's known for more than 24 hours and didn't have the courtesy to decline.

I have a NYE baby, and had the same issue for her around parties (even when i offered to have the guests overnight - CF parents asking if i'd have all the siblings etc, instead of just saying "no" or "yes")

Have you checked that you are required for the whole time?

At about that age I used to host a play afternoon for a handful of DS’s friends 2-3 days before Christmas. The invite was always “games in the afternoon for the kids and adults welcome to join for nibbles and wine”

Mostly the adults would drop, go and do 2-3 hours of Christmas jobs and then come back with a bottle to share…

I think it's hard on this one. Some people will be busy Christmas eve, some will have done everything and have a quiet day. A few days earlier might be busier for some people because they will still be shopping, food shopping, etc others will have been done and chilling for a week now! Some will go to friends or relatives Christmas Eve, some will be chilling before the "BIG" day where they are out or entertaining. Some, who aren't running round like headless chickens, will want a quiet family day, others might love something special to do that they don't have to organise! Some it might be the only family day they get, others it might not even be a family day if parent(s) are retail workers or something. I think you'll annoy someone whatever you do!

It is awful time though. That’s not the birthday girl’s fault. Or her parents.

Which is why OP is still going and taking her dd.

It’s human nature to dread things.

I had promised to meet a friend during bad rain and wind the other day. I moaned to DH about having to go out in bad weather but once I got there I had a lovely time with my friend.

I’d be annoyed, not because it’s on xmas eve. But because 4 hours is a ridiculous length of time for a party. They are 2 hours max usually and no parents need to stay for 6-7 year old children. Reception age yes, anything above that and I am not staying especially not 4 hours on xmas eve.
Id just drop and say oh sorry somethings come up. Sure you don’t mind. I’ll pick up at 4 byeeeee

Just say that you have a lot of Xmas organisation to do so you can’t stay at the party and therefore your child won’t be there. Say that you look forward to inviting said child round after Christmas when things have quietened down.

If her birthday is on Christmas eve, YABU. if it is any other day, YANBU. These things are usually planned in advance, so anything you needed to do, should have been planned in prior to you accepting the party.

Having a Christmas eve birthday can be rubbish and I am sure the child will be absolutely made up that her closest friends can put Christmas aside for a few hours, to celebrate her birthday.

I'm sure the kids will have a great time

YABVU

I have two kids with late December birthdays and it's shit.

Crappy cold weather so indoor stuff only then people cancel because of Christmas stuff.

Seriously, just go! Have a great time. I wouldn't wish a Christmas birthday on anyone!