Would you go on this holiday?

[Etilo]

My husbands parents, uncle and his wife, and grandparents have presented the offer of a new tradition.
10 days holiday, all flights and Accomodation paid for in the Easter holidays to the Caribbean.

In attendance would be

• Husbands Grandparents
• Husbands Parents
• Husbands uncle and his wife
• Husbands sister, her husband and 2 children aged 4 and 7
• Husbands brother, his wife and their children aged 5, 8 and 10
• Husband and I and our 2 children 6 and 9
• Husbands cousin, her partner and her child aged 3

They have found a villa which they claim would fit everyone nicely. AIBU to say I don't want to go and husband can go with the kids and his family and I'll have a nice week, not waste any annual leave and have evenings and a weekend to myself.
If it goes well they want to make it an annual tradition and I just don't think I can stand 10 days with the in laws and so many kids.

I might be up for this as a one off but I wouldn't want to commit to doing it every year.

If the kids get on they would probably absolutely love it at those ages but I couldn’t stand it and that villa and mix of ages sounds like a recipe for disaster.

I am with you and two day weekend in a bigger villa would be my absolute limit with DH’s family and only then if DH would agree to me having at least a couple of hours a day away from them all either on my own or as our little family.

Do you like them all OP? Do you have a good time when you're with them? Will it be fairly relaxed so you can go off and do your own thing if you want? Will it be taken amiss if you don't go?

The accommodation sounds pretty crowded to me. Have you seen photos of it? I'm just thinking that with all those little kids running about it will be pretty chaotic and there won't be many lie-ins!

My family also do these big holidays and a week is as much as I can cope with. They're doing two weeks this year and we're just going for one.

Not for me - I’d be relaxing at home alone while DH went with the kids. That would be awesome.

That's 22 people in one house. Oh lord, I'm having a panic attack for you. All those personalities in one place.

Have you all been away together before?
If not, can you suggest a short uk break to test the waters? See who shows their true colours colours wrt pulling weight with cooking, cleaning, drinking, childcare, and organising the fun. And see if the kids get on when thrown together for a period of time and where the clashes are - bedtime, snacking, manners(!).

It all sounds idyllic on paper but the reality will be that the Caribbean is expensive, especially food shopping (rum is cheap ) and eating out.

Maybe a cruise would be better, every family can have a cabin (not sure about the family if 5, one could bunk in with grandparents maybe?). All food included, beach trips on shore days, and each family pays for their own extras.

I would go, they're should be plenty off opportunity for you to go off by yourself, swimming, walking, long lunch etc.The kids will be fully occupied, and it is your DH and your children's family. They will have wonderful memories. But of course it is up to you in the end.

I'd rather eat my own arm.

I'd love it! 10 days in Caribbean all paid for and the kids will be entertained with that many people!

Thinking on it Op, this is a good way of seeing how much your DH really wants to go - tell him he takes the kids and you stay at home. When he works out he'll have to do the parenting rather than just enjoy himself he might change his mind about going. Sounds like a Get out of Jail free card to me

All going to the same place, I'd cope I think.

All saying in the same house, not a chance NOPE.

In fact i think you should rehearse this in a massive lodge/house for a long weekend here at home somewhere first. There might be a few changes of minds then!

On the other hand, it could be amazing, glass half full and all that

It sounds like my worst nightmare.

I'd rather be on a freebie in the Carribean with my partner and children than at home on my own, so while it might not be the optimum situation and company, I'd rather do it than not. However I LOVE holidays and have high tolerance for inconvenience and a low bar for enjoyment. Just being with my family in a new place ,with the sun shining and access to a beach or pool is enough to make me happy.

No I definitely wouldn't go. It's as far from what I want in a holiday as you can get really. I wouldn't stop anyone else going though and would do as you have.

It would be my idea of hell, even if it was my family and only half of them. I think it might be great if all people are polite , considerate and not very fussy. It’s not my family and it definitely not me so I will be out. But some people do it (at least that what I saw on MN) and even enjoy it.
My DD wouldn’t sleep and eat in this situation, we’re very “stuck to a certain routine” family and it would be hell after 2 days.
I could do a weekend away (short not long) once in a few years but not 10 days.

Absolutely agree.

I have a very low tolerance for inconvenience ( opposite to @5128gap ) so I wouldn’t go.

Now @Etilo you need to work out which camp you and your kids belong to.

I’d go the first time and then assess just whether you want to make it a tradition or not.

Cruise sounds like a perfect solution in these circumstances.

My In-Laws do something similar, less people though, 7 adults and 4 kids. It works really well. This year we went to St Lucia, lovely villa, near the beach, big pool. We ate out about half the time then took turns cooking the others. My DD and DHs cousins DD shared a room at first which was chaos (they were 2 and 3 at the time and just kept each other up) his cousin quickly moved her DD in with her though and then it was very smooth from there on out.
They always pay everything, including food when there and we always fly business class which makes it a right treat for all involved.

Nope.

If someone else was paying, yes. If I had to pay, no.