To eat at a restaurant alone on Christmas day

[Gorganzolabrie]

I'm a single woman in my sixties with no children. This year all my family and friends will be away/with other family for Christmas and for the first time ever I'll be alone on the 25th. This doesn't particularly bother me. It would be nice to have someone to spend Christmas with but I'm not a very Christmassy person and I'm looking forward to going away for a week over New Year.

I discovered that one of my favourite local restaurants is open for a few hours in the afternoon and has a Christmas menu, so I booked myself in. I'm now having second thoughts. I'm wondering if I'll feels self-conscious dining on my own on Christmas day. I don't really want to be an object of people's curiosity or pity and I certainly don't want to be invited to join another table. Should I cancel and have a more relaxing time on my own? I'm also curious about whether any of you have dined alone in public on Christmas day? What was it like? If you saw somebody doing it, would you feel sorry for them?

YABU - Sod what people think - go and enjoy your solo meal

YANBU - Stay at home. It will be less stressful

TIA for your responses.

I'd take an iPad rather than a book. Send messages to people, and obviously report back to MN the exploits of Dougie and Janet.

Why should op volunteer?
She might be glad of a peaceful restful day

And often volunteering type places are swamped with offers at Christmas

I have seen people dining alone on Christmas Day and I think it’s a lovely thing to do. Another table did invite them to join them but the lady declined. I dine alone regularly and enjoy it. If people think it’s sad and lonely then that’s about their insecurity.

Please go and enjoy it!

I would take a book / iPad / kindle / headphones as a deterrent for anyone wanting to pity you.

Sod other people, have a lovely meal!

How would you feel if someone asked you to join their table?
I’ve got a tiny family so it can get a bit boring just having Christmas dinner together. We’d always love to get together with people who’d like to share a meal. Could you ask the restaurant if they are asking other solo diners, or small tables, if they’d like to get together with others?

If I was expecting to be alone on Christmas Day, I would consider going away to a hotel for a couple of days if I knew that there were likely to be other single people there. I don't think I would feel comfortable eating alone in a local restaurant where the other tables were likely to be full of noisy family groups.

Sounds great, at least you know the company is top tier! I love eating out alone, delicious food and wine with fairly uninterrupted time to get stuck into my book.

Exactly this.

Any other night/meal etc all year, it wouldn't matter. But most people have this instinctive "no one should be alone at Christmas" you are going to get literally every table pulling an "oh poor you face", insisting you join them. Which at best I would find really annoying, and at worst, I would end up feeling like the pitied loner that everyone was talking about and wouldn't be able to enjoy my meal. Slightly drunk people aren't known for being quiet or subtle and you'll end up overhearing things like "oh, poor woman, she's braver than me" patronising stuff too.

Go and enjoy it, but I wouldn't automatically brush off people if they want to invite you to their table. Be open that they might just be extroverts that are curious about you, and you might make a pleasant casual acquaintance and a nice memory with them. Some people will be nosey, gossipy types who want to know your story for unpleasant reasons, but not everyone is like that.

I know not everyone celebrates Christmas and I’m sure some do choose to be there, but that’s not going to be the case for everyone, and it’s horrible. Fair enough, some jobs you just have to and I get that but no way would I choose to make someone work if it could be avoided.

Absolutely go! I'd think nothing of it whatsoever, frankly I'd be a little jealous!

I would definitely do this as long as the place wouldn't be too noisy or crowded.

I've eaten out on my own many, many times and love to do so. I always take a book to read. An actual book, that is, not something on your tablet. It provides more of a barrier.

No one has ever invited me to join them. The horror! If they do, just smile sweetly, thank them and have a polite reply ready.

Enjoy your Christmas meal!

Go!
I hope you enjoy your lovely Christmas dinner in your favourite restaurant OP!🌲

I would

I doubt anyone will give you more than a passing thought.

100% go @Gorganzolabrie You will have an amazing time!

If asked to join others, I would say 'This is my treat to myself as I've had a super busy year, so I'll stay here thanks, but I do appreciate you offering. Have a lovely day'

You're not choosing to make someone work, you don't get that choice.

I worked Xmas day when I was 19 and very happily so.

I got double time, and so many tips from the customers I was absolutely quids in.

Nobody did or could, force me to work it.

I wouldn't do it, but only because I could not be arsed getting ready to go out when the alternative is to stay in PJs, drinking champagne and scoffing M&S party food all day.

But if that's not for you, then go to the restaurant and have a lovely time x

I do think people who notice will feel sorry for you and potentially try to invite you over but what does it matter if they do? Just have a nice response ready and say it loud enough for others in your vicinity to get the message and enjoy your lovely meal xxx

If it's how you want to spend your afternoon then absolutely go for it. I wouldn't pity a woman who I saw doing this unless she otherwise looked sad; I would admire her for doing what she wants. However, I do think you will get people inviting you to join them, not necessarily out of pity but just because it's a widely shared holiday. If you took a book or something you'd probably get less of this; or you could ask the waiting staff to make sure people leave you alone!

In short, spend the day however you like and don't worry what others think.

You should definitely go and enjoy it. I wouldn’t want to be invited to another table either but my suggestion would be just to say “no thank you, I’ve not had a meal alone before and I’ve been looking forward to it”. It’s just quite positive and people dont feel sorry for you (not that there’s any reason to) and get on with their own meal. Have fun and a lovely trip over NY

On Christmas day though?

I can't imagine anyone asking a lone diner to join their table at any other time of the year.

Where abouts in the UK are you? Is it generally friendly?

I would go yes, absolutely!
For me, I would go to the morning church service first, and sit next to others of a similar age so you can exchange pleasantries and ask how their Christmases are. I would enjoy the warmth and inclusiveness of a church, followed by a very busy pub with tons of people! I would enjoy a tipple.

Then head home and either order my favourite takeaway or other treats. Watch my favourite programmes and call a few friends.

But in other jobs they do.

If there is no demand for it then it stops. My view is that everyone should be allowed a day to rest; a paid day at that.

If you’re a doctor or a firefighter or paramedic then of course you can’t. But I don’t think pubs and restaurants fall into that category.

I think dining alone is rather empowering! I’d take a good book and enjoy having no washing up to do 😊