To eat at a restaurant alone on Christmas day

[Gorganzolabrie]

I'm a single woman in my sixties with no children. This year all my family and friends will be away/with other family for Christmas and for the first time ever I'll be alone on the 25th. This doesn't particularly bother me. It would be nice to have someone to spend Christmas with but I'm not a very Christmassy person and I'm looking forward to going away for a week over New Year.

I discovered that one of my favourite local restaurants is open for a few hours in the afternoon and has a Christmas menu, so I booked myself in. I'm now having second thoughts. I'm wondering if I'll feels self-conscious dining on my own on Christmas day. I don't really want to be an object of people's curiosity or pity and I certainly don't want to be invited to join another table. Should I cancel and have a more relaxing time on my own? I'm also curious about whether any of you have dined alone in public on Christmas day? What was it like? If you saw somebody doing it, would you feel sorry for them?

YABU - Sod what people think - go and enjoy your solo meal

YANBU - Stay at home. It will be less stressful

TIA for your responses.

Absolutely, go and enjoy yourself, it really is nobody else's business what you choose to do. There is far too much pressure on society about Christmas Day and not everyone celebrates it anyway. It's common to see one person in a cafe / restaurant any day of the week, so I'm sure you'll be fine.

Ooohhh, how lovely, no sodding cooking, no sodding washing up, absolute legend you are. As someone else said I definitely want to come with, but it would throw the whole post into disarray.

I wouldn’t, I’d feel to self-conscious. Fair play to anyone who does eat out alone though. I wouldn’t be judging. I’d admire their confidence.

Thank you all for your supportive messages. It seems that the majority think I should go and, unless I have a last-minute crisis of confidence then I will. I get the appeal of a cosy day in with a bottle of fizz and Netflix but I still have most of the rest of the day for that.

It's a smallish, quiet, French restaurant in North London. The kind of place frequented more by couples and small groups than families, so I'm not anticipating being besieged by hordes of rowdy merry-makers but you never know. Who knows, I may even be persuaded to join another table if I like the look of them.

Whatever you're all doing for Christmas, I hope you have a lovely one and a very happy New Year.

@Petrasings do consider that the 'looking really sad' might just be resting bitch face, and that you 'trotting up' to invite me to join you would be the most awful and patronising intrusion.

Also consider if someone is genuinely feeling desperate and sad, recently bereaved maybe, how on earth, if that person is an introvert maybe, would joining a jolly bunch of strangers possibly help?

Personally I bloody love it.

The world don't move to the beat of just one drum 😚

I've eaten out at a big buffet restaurant before on Christmas day. I wasn't alone on that occasion. However due to the set up I literally couldn't have told you whether there was any single diners. Lots and lots of different groups. If you feel happy in yourself I'd go for it

@Gorganzolabrie "I'm now having second thoughts. I'm wondering if I'll feel self-conscious dining on my own on Christmas day. I don't really want to be an object of people's curiosity or pity and I certainly don't want to be invited to join another table. Should I cancel and have a more relaxing time on my own?"

You may feel self-conscious during the starter OP and maybe you'll feel that way for the whole meal. Or you may be over any self-consciousness by the main course, or you may not feel self-conscious at all. You don't know how you'll feel unless you go. I wouldn't mind being the object of people's curiosity (like I'm a character in a novel they're writing, I'd want them to enjoy speculating) but if anyone does pity you, I think (as a pp has said) this will be closely followed by admiration for you having the confidence to dine alone on Christmas Day. And as other pps have said, if you're invited to join anyone you can simply thank them for their kindness and politely decline (then they can speculate some more ... 😉).
Of course cooking at home for yourself would be more relaxed, but if you really enjoy this restaurant's food I'd go for it. Even just interacting with bar and waiting staff would feel like you'd "done" something for Christmas Day and getting dressed up for it will make the day feel more special too (and in my experience, staff are even more friendly to people dining alone).
Obviously, you must do whatever you feel comfortable with, but please don't not go because of how you think you might feel. You may really enjoy it and gain the reassurance it's something you could do in the future without worry - or you may discover it's not for you and you wouldn't repeat it. But you won't know if you don't give it a try. 😊

I wish for you a wonderful Christmas lunch op, and it sounds like a very good choice too. Who knows what will happen? You might meet a new friend or have a good time with the staff. Many others will tread this path as they get older.

if you are doing a thing you enjoy, whether that’s dining, running, or whatever you like to do to spend time happily, It really doesn’t matter what anyone else may be thinking about it. Just do what makes you happy and don’t worry about how other people may or may not view it.

I think it sounds quite enjoyable. I'd take a book for between courses.

I like to think I would take the time to read the situation and person, if they were indicating that they would be welcome to a conversation with meeting my eyes, smiling at me, looking over etc I would never just doorstep anyone! I am emotionally intelligent and trust I would know if someone was happy to be left alone or equally welcoming of a conversation. It’s usually obvious.

I eat out alone all the time but wouldn’t do it Christmas Day, I’d be far too self conscious. I’ve spent several Christmas Days alone and always had some nice food at home.

Get a seat looking out the window OP so you have something to watch rather than facing other diners

I'll be eating in a hotel bar with my dog for Christmas lunch. Will also bring a book!

I eat out by myself loads now so hoping Christmas day isn't too different.

Absolutely go and enjoy the lovely food!

It seems that the majority think I should go and, unless I have a last-minute crisis of confidence then I will.

Be prepared to be charged the full price of your meal if you cancel.

Merry Christmas and have a wonderful time whatever you choose to do 🎄

I frequently eat out alone, but probably wouldn't on Christmas day unless I was on holiday.
Prices double/triple compared to normal prices - fair enough, staff are being paid more.
I enjoy slobbing around, late brunch, walk, and probably eat my main meal at around 5-6pm.

I'll be eating in a hotel bar with my dog for Christmas lunch.

Interesting choice.

I'm having turkey for mine 😁🦃

Didnt mention Christmas Day did I? Said many a lunch alone in restaurants

But I would have gone for a Christmas curry alone on Christmas Day if I was fortunate to have been alone on the day, couldn't think of anything nicer tbh :)

Ha! She'll probably want turkey too.

Staying in the very dog friendly hotel and she'll be in a fully secured carrier rather than sat out in the open.

It's a difficult one...I've not qualms about eating out alone AT ALL but I would automatically feel a bit bad for someone if I saw them eating alone on Christmas day..just like my daughter eats alone in the school canteen and some girls invited her to join them because she looked lonely! I think its just human nature. It's a shame though cos it would be nice to get waited on

Ahh no you didn't that's true.

But as that's what the OP is asking about, I thought that's what you meant.

That sounds so lovely enjoying Christmas with your beloved dog. I hope he/she will be suitably rewarded for being excellent good company 🥰 and probably the only time any of us can be sure of a drama free Christmas!

I’d do it. I’d get dressed up to the nines, then get there early and get a few drinks in at the bar before being seated. And then by the time eating along came around, I’d know I looked my hottest, and be too drunk to care about being solo. I’d probably start cheers-ing other tables at this point too, but I’m a confident drunk!

do it, enjoy it. Even if it’s just for the experience, so you know if it’s something you’d like to do in the future. Also, you never know who you could get talking to. New friends and connections can be made in these situations where you have to push yourself!

Take an oversize teddy bear, sit it in the chair opposite you and ask for an extra plate for it. Then chat away to your bear, offering it food and drink.
Noone will ask you to join them then.

More seriously. If it's something you fancy, absolutely go for it. Have exactly the food and drink you want whether it's five starters and 12 desserts, or the traditional meal. It's no business of anyone else's how you want to enjoy your day.

I find eating out in pubs by myself completely fine. Never been asked to share with someone. but if it happens, just smile and say no thank you.