Boyfriend thinks it ok to say he still loves his ex wife

[Superfrog1]

We have been together for 4 years and we have fallen out over his thinking it’s ok to say he will always love his ex wife but he’s not i. love with her! I don’t think this is acceptable but am I being unreasonable ? They share a 12 year old son and she is in a long term relationship.

Have you been in my situation?
im thinking not that’s why you can say that! try imagine something different i hope it doesn’t happen to you x

I spent years feeling the same way. I now know the difference.
I will always love my partner, we have children and history. He was a lovely person and still is sometimes, but things have happened over the years that I can't forgive or get beyond - as a result, although still together I'm not in love with him anymore.

It's a pretty sad if people only have one type of love for one person. By your criteria you could love only one of your children or your parents. You really don't seem to understand emotional intelligence about different variations of love.

The I love you but not in love with you isn't that the get out clause that some use to dump a partner.
Personally I think it means the sum of fuck all.

I love my ex and we broke up 10 years ago in a horrible way. I just don't see how you can feel that intensely and care for someone that intensely and not have those feelings linger. I'd never get back with him, the idea is laughable but imagine he'd feel the same. But he's a part of my history. And if we met again I imagine it'd be like greeting a long-lost relative. There'd be familiarity and care there but nothing romantic. I get it.

I would much rather be with a man who still cared/loved his ex who he has a child with than a man who hates his ex partner and is bitter towards her

sounds responsible and respectful

yabu

OP you know you can love someone as a person and friend, right?

Right?

My emotional intelligence is not in question.

I assume the ex was once loved romantically and that love doesn’t transfer to the kind of love
felt for a child or parent just because circumstances have changed.

Using derogatory terms to me doesn’t strengthen your argument, it weakens it.

If you haven't the emotional intelligence to realise love can change in a relationship that's fine. Not everyone is the same.

As most have said you can love without being in love. You don't get it that's fine 🤷‍♀️

Absolutely not the same!

This is dreadful

Dump him