FERAL xmas day gift opening

[HebburnPokemon]

AIBU to cringe and feel deflated on xmas morning when the kids (we have a few, aged 7-14) dive into the presents like feral animals, rip open the wrapping on their gifts, not even properly look at the gift before moving to the next, sometimes not even finishing removing the wrapping paper. No thank you. No comment about the gift. Just manic, uncivilised chaos. :( Then disappear back to their rooms.

I don't allow this and my kids are far younger. No one is allowed to opn anything until everyone is downstairs and ready either. Apart from stocking which can be opened in bed whenever they wake in the morning.
When everyones eaten breakfast amd is ready we then hand out presents one by one in the living room.

Unless you procured your children at a later stage, you're the ones who have validated this. You've had 7-14 Christmasses to have stopped this.

The DC get the stockings left on their beds and they can open them when they wake up.

We eat zucchini bread and drink coffee or Cremont and open gifts one at a time after everyone is up. We used to put the Yule Log channel on the TV but I don't know if you can get that in the UK.

I just had a look. The Yule Log is on Youtube.

Because of wrangling an elderly relative (wanted to see the children open their presents but didn't arrive until lunch time) we always spread the presents out so that there was something worth opening first thing in the morning and something to play with while waiting for relative. We didn't have an equal number of presents but the older ones didn't care.

Nope. Wouldn't happen.

Because my children aren't feral oiks.

We have always done one gift at a time. Don't let them open them like that even if you don't put them out, hand them out calmly

This - it seems like such a waste!

Ever since I could remember my Dad would don his Santa hat and get the presents from under the tree and hand them out one by one. We didn’t even start to open them until all the presents had been given out. My sister and I would often take turns opening a gift so we could watch each other. Mum and Dad usually waited until we’d finished opening to open their gifts. We liked to prolong the pleasure and excitement as long as possible. This wasn’t forced on us by our parents, it was just what we did.

The gift opening happened between breakfast (which Dad always cooked) and lunch.

If you can’t be feral on Christmas morning, when can you?!

I tell both dds to take turns.

We have akways done it that way. I like to see each of their faces. If they do it at the sane time I won't get to.

This year I've ended up getting both exactly the same gifts though so they might have to open theirs together.

Why does it happen?
Because you allow it.

I absolutely hated Christmas Day when I was a child because of this. We were allowed to do the feral opening, and even for a NT kid it's overwhelming, but for an ADHD child (late diagnosis) it's completely ruinous.

As an adult, we do as other PPs have said: one each on waking up, one after breakfast, one after a walk, one mid-afternoon, etc. The present opening might take several days but it means we can enjoy each one, share the experience, actually register and even use the gifts we've received. My most ND child can take weeks to open all their presents (and there aren't loads), because they need to really go slowly.

Good luck, OP! It can be done, especially if you bribe them with snacks and the like. Happy Christmas x

Mine are 12 and 14 and don't listen to me usually though but they are used to it this way.

I have to say I hate the thought of opening gifts one by one with everyone watching - I absolutely can’t stand opening gifts in front of other people! Can’t they just tear in as they please?

The issue is them running off to their rooms after. As the present opening comes to a close can you stick on a Christmas film for everyone to watch together with chocolate coins/whatever is in their stocking? Then you can talk during the film about which gifts they liked and why, in a no pressure way.

That happens here too. Plus younger children want to open things right up and skip turns, so build a backlog. We are very laid back with it. Adults always have less here, but it is grand because it gradually tails off anyway as people stop to examine things.

We don't wrap santa stuff, that goes in a sack. So there are family gifts and one present for each child from us.

I think a massive free for all stops children from taking in who bought things, or what they have and just feels like a consumer fest. Our children get excitement from giving us their gifts and giving gifts to one another. I like to see that. We are on the same page though, so that is easier.

This is the right and proper way. How do people who have a free for all know who gave what present? Presumably the children don't then say/send thank yous to the appropriate people? Totally unacceptable in my book.

We do too. I make wee champagne cocktails. It takes us a good while.

Oh we have no one to thanks. They are all from us so that's easy.

Talk to your DH. What you want to be different? See what you can agree on.

Like several other posters, only stockings are a free for all here (to buy us an extra half hour in bed!). Then if every one is ready before church there is time for them to choose one or two each before we go, then we have snacks and rest of presents when we get back.

What do you want?

That's how we do it in our family

I would absolutely hate it if I spent all that time and money and effort I am lovely gifts and my kids acted like that. It would make me want to cry! I have two kids and they always have the same number of presents so one would open a present and then the other would. I don't think kids appreciate anything if they are acting the way yours do. As your husband, after one Christmas that would've been it for me! I think it says an awful lot about someone's upbringing if they behave like that.

Yeah it is horrible, but it’s the parents that allow this. I was taught, and in turn taught my children, to delay gratification by pacing out the present opening. Stockings are first thing, then a tree present mid-morning, and if routine allows, the rest of the presents are opened together in the afternoon.

One year I had food poisoning so was too ill to get out of bed on Christmas Day, so dh and the dcs went over to my parents for Christmas dinner. The dcs opened their presents at 6pm that evening when they were back home and I was well enough to get up. The didn’t complain, they said the main thing was that I was well enough to watch them. Bless them they were only about 8 and 9.

I'm guessing that any kids that behave like this aren't really that much fun to be around, so the fact they then go back to their rooms afterwards is probably a significant bonus.

You are the adult so probably time to do some adulting and set some acceptable behaviour patterns.

It sounds awful.

We do one at a time too, other than stockings which are done first.

When the children were young, I used to space out the opening of presents throughout the day - a couple before breakfast, a couple after, and so on throughout the day. I tended to give them in a particular order so for example if they had a Lego set I'd give them that when I knew I would be engaged in the kitchen for a while.

I probably stopped doing that when they were teens though - then it was probably a couple before breakfast and all the rest after. Even so, I always made sure that they looked at one properly before moving onto the next.

I also always made a list of who gave them what so I could make sure that they wrote thank you letters.

Now they are adults, they have fewer presents so we tend to open them in one session. Whoever is sitting nearest the tree finds one for everyone else and we all open one each, thank whoever has given it, hand it round to show others etc.