DH ruined my lunch.

[TwigletsAndRadishes]

AIBU? I don't know why I am asking really, I know I am not. I need to vent.

Bought two of those plastic trays of mixed salad from the self service salad bar at Morrisons. All sorts in them. A curried rice thing, a pesto pasta, grated cheese, lettuce/tomato/cucumber, coleslaw, beetroot salad, hard boiled eggs, potato salad, some sort of couscous thing. I did my best to place each different spoonful of stuff into its own corner of the tray with something else layered on top, like lettuce or tomato, or hard boiled egg, so it wouldn't be too much of a mixed up mush and it would still be possible (ish) to separate the different elements onto a plate at home. Ok, so it was never going to be easy/perfect, but not completely impossible.

DH asked if he should dish up lunch. I said yes, if you like.

I came in to find that he's tipped both trays of salad into one huge bowl and mixed the entire lot up so it looked like pigswill. WTF? Why would you even do that? It looked the scrapings off people's plates after they'd finished eating.

I was just incredulous and so exasperated. I said 'what the hell did you do that for? What on earth were you thinking? That's going to be disgusting.'

He was then furious at me for being furious at him. Apparently it was just too difficult to separate the different salads so he had 'no choice' but mix it all together and he just knew I'd moan about it, because I moan about everything. And I shouldn't have asked him to dish up (I didn't) if I don't like the way he does things and I can do everything myself in future because all I ever do is criticise and never say anything positive to anyone.

So he knew I'd moan, but he did it anyway?

He sat there pretending to enjoy his dog's dinner of coleslaw mixed with curried rice, grated cheese, pesto pasta and beetroot with soggy bits of lettuce in it and I took two mouthfuls and felt faintly sick. I don't have sensory issues, I'm not a fussy eater and I am not the type who can't have different foods touching on the plate, but even I have my limits.

I had a tin of soup instead. I am not being unreasonable am I?

Yuck! But I guess maybe those salad items are best put separately when buying them. Or just buy the individual tubs of different mixed salads? I'm not saying it's your fault but maybe he thinks he's mixing it up like that on his plate so that is just how it's eaten? Which is pretty weird.

I'd be upset though. I had an incident like that where I carefully curated a nicoise salad for a shared work lunch with a male friend. I put all the veg stuff on the bottom, and the quartered eggs, anchovies and tuna at the top.
I came to lunchtime and the entire top layer was missing. Just green stuff left. 🙃

My 'mate' just shrugged, said, oh yeah, I helped myself during morning break. Fucking wanker. I never made food for him again! 🤣

he could have just said 'oops, sorry, I didn't really think that through did I? Shall I make us a sandwich?' And we could have laughed about it. Instead he got all shirty and defensive.

Very true too! Hopefully this will become a funny story eventually…

YANBU that sounds disgusting but this thread has been entertaining 😂

I wonder if he did try to serve it up all nicely but it went wrong and rather than admit it he attempted to style it out by mixing it all together?

Knowing you would of course be fuming he’s jumped on the defence and is pretending to enjoy the mess….

Not really answering your question, but I used to work on the salad bar at a branch of Morrisons. Do you know it's all soaked in Milton before it's put out in the shop?
Yuk!

Yeah weird but hardly daggers at dawn is it??? Most men don't think like we do.

I mean…. You’ll all live. It’s not really a fury situation.

I get you OP.

There are two types of people in life, normal people like us, then food churners, like your DH. Frustratingly, the two often end up together trying to coexist.

Seems odd you'd get a salad that didn't mix together without using separate containers. I'm team dh here. Yabu.

This is why we each get our own Morrisons salad box to eat 😂🙈

sounds awful though, what a waste

Why does it? It might look that way...

Sorry, but you do sound like hard work OP. Sounds like you might have a tendency to moan about stuff. I couldn’t live with someone who got uptight about trivial things.

Well it depends what has been mixed I guess. But it’s obviously a well known thing that not all flavours taste nice together. If they did, no one would bother following recipes or cooking specific meals, they’d just throw a load of individual ingredients they liked into a pan and eat it.
For example, I love beetroot and I love pesto. Doesn’t mean I like them mixed together.

Did you marry Baldrick? A sulky one?

My late OH was the same, if the lid closed then it wasn't full!
Isn't this thread the epitome of the MN meal of 'picky bits', or something like that.

If it was the choice between you Baldrick and the man who cleans the toilets in Aberdeen it would be Wee Jock Poo Pong McPlop every time.

As someone who does have sensory issues with food and IS a very fussy eater, this doesn't bother me, haha. So I voted YABU, because my thinking is that you're eating it all anyway and unless you're precious about eating things very seperately (which I understand, but you said you're not) then what difference does it make?

Presentation sounds a bit poor, granted, but if you'd been hoping for it all to be separated out specifically I think you should have told him!

To be fair, he's provided quite the synopsis of things that irritate him about you, and they're all a bit deeper than mushing up salad😬

Get a grip, this is about a salad

My DH would know better than to touch my lunch! I'm with you on this, he did it to wind you up, he can't be that stupid.

Yes, get all defensive, then blame the other person, deflection.

😂

Yeah he was stupid. Who on earth mixes up those salad things! Gross just no. I like to eat each bit at a time. Mixing it up 🤢

Omg that’s the type of thing my DH would do and enrage me more 🤣

My DH would also do this, but he eats mashed potatoes with curry and pasta with gravy and ketchup and brown sauce together. Would not trust him with this, you know for next time.

Ahh yes the usual mix of those who get the underlying issue and those who wilfully miss the point to be irritating.

Mixing it all together is disgusting, and stupid, we have spoons. Use them.

Mixing it all together, knowing your partner will not like it like that, then claiming that it was too difficult to do any other way, when the option existed to say 'ah, can you do this as I know you won't like it if its all mixed together'...

Is ultimately twattery. Its a micro-aggression, its upsetting someone purely so you can then say 'oh you're over sensitive/picky/I can't do anything right with you...' etc.

Cunty.