Everyone just assumed they can bring their dogs with them for Christmas day ??

[caninechristmasconundrum]

In the last year 3 members of our family have got dogs (2 puppies 1 older rescue) . We always host for Christmas and I (maybe stupidly) assumed that dogs go to kennels or stay at home for the day ? I’ve never had pets before so will admit I don’t know much ! I don’t see why a few hours at home / in a crate is bad for dogs though? We don’t live that far away.

Seems they all expected to bring their dogs with them ???

After BIL and SIL made this clear and told us that ILs will be the same about their rescue dog I’ve sent a message to everyone saying ‘Really sorry but I think there may have been some confusion on my part and I assumed the dogs would all be left at home on Christmas day. We are not able to have them here due to personal preference, lack of space and the dc are still so little. You’re all still very welcome but I understand if it’s going to be a problem leaving the dogs at home so let me know what you’d like to do xx’

DH got messages back asking is it because of my ‘germ ocd’ (in part it is that’s why I put personal preference) and telling him he has a say in it too as it’s not just my house. He replied that he assumed the same and although we have the biggest house it’s not exactly huge and having 3 dogs there too will just be too much so he’s in total agreement with me (they aren’t small breeds and the puppies are at that into everything zooming about stage)

Is this the norm now that dogs go everywhere and are never left home for a few hours ? AIBU to want a dog free Christmas ?!

Those people should not have dogs though.

Christmas day, excited children, rescue dog, two others. Sounds too stressful for the dogs.

She invited the families for Christmas. Both families got new dogs this year. I didn’t say OP has to “plan for other people’s dogs”. I said she should probably have thought of it before now.

Oh, people with dogs have houses that smell like dog???? How fascinating, please tell me more.

Agree with pp- your house your rules and it doesn’t matter what the reason is for you not wanting dogs in your house.
I’d view the going behind your back to DH as disrespectful to yours and DH’s relationship - they perceive this as you stopping DH doing something rather than a decision you made as a couple. I’d be pretty pissed off at that.

YANBU to not want 3 dogs as well as a load of visitors. However, this being the case, you should have thought more carefully about this before inviting them. Nevertheless you are quite right to cancel the invitation and they can work something out between themselves.

Indeed. I understand that there's a group working on the development of vaccines at the moment 😁

We left our dog last year, we aren’t leaving him this year so staying at home. I wouldn’t take him elsewhere but at the same time he’s used to being left 2/3 hours max so any more than that I’d rather not. sounds like a great way to not have tonnes of people stay all day op but absolutely say no dogs,

If you don’t have dogs of course you’d not want them in your house for Christmas Day with young kids, you’ll be busy etc

I never take my dogs to anyone’s house ever. If we’re out with the dogs and go to visit someone they’re left in the car (with water and not in summer).

Was in John Lewis yesterday. Too many dogs!

You are being unreasonable I'm afraid. Why would you expect someone to leave a member of the family at home?

Yes of course, to short notice now.It could have been possible however, if it had been thought out and planned months in advance by the people who are visiting.It’s like with anything with Christmas, you need to book in advance

Hilarious

Thankfully, selfish dog owners like you are the minority on this thread.

FFS! People have gone mental nowadays when it comes to dogs! The dogs.know nothing & couldn’t care less as long as they’re fed watered & walked !

When did this weird trend of dogs being treated as children start? Makes me cringe & I’m a dog owner! I don’t think my dog should to go everywhere I go! Where fo you draw the line ?

I know several people who have rescue dogs and all of them are incredibly timid. The very last thing they would want is a loud family Christmas in a strange house.

Never taken a dog into a shop. What a miserable experience mine would find it.

It's mad isn't it? I am sure they would rather stay at home and sleep.

Mind you, the same often goes for kids who get dragged to supermarkets for a family outing and hate it. One parent should do the shopping (or do it online) while the other one takes the kids somewhere interesting.

And the same goes for dogs. Beach or park, not shops!

I haven’t read the whole thread but in this house if we wanted to have a dog we would have a dog. we don’t have a dog because we don’t want to have a dog in the house. Simple.
People assume a lot about different things sometimes they need to be corrected about their assumptions.

I followed it up with the caveat that we actually don't leave our boy that long. 8 hours is the longest ever and that's been very few occasions. I knew loads of families growing up who did leave them for 9 hours.

I just find the new age dog obsession like they're humans very strange. So we are Old Skool in the way that he is our family member, but an animal. He doesn't need to be a part of stuff and go everywhere that humans do. Not saying that's what you were implying though. Each to their own. But this thread has highlighted how the views have changed around dog ownership since the 90s (when I grew up).

Plenty of good dog-owners here have said that they wouldn’t turn up somewhere with their dogs. Indeed they have often said they would not welcome dogs being brought to their houses either. You say, ‘uptight’. Others would say ‘considerate’ 🤷🏼‍♀️

it really is simple. It’s all down to the hosts preference. There are no rules abou5 whether people should do it or not. I guess like child free weddings which are quite common - some people welcome children, some don’t. Christmas Day - some people welcome dogs, some don’t. But likewise if the owners don’t want to attend an Xmas day minus their dog, then you just have to accept that’s what they want to do too.

They sound like a delightful bunch - BIL coming with the accusation theories and MIL with the emotional blackmail - lovely!

Your DH is right to be pissed. They're flexing muscle to try to get their way.

If it carries on, I really wouldn't blame him for rescinding the offer. Just make sure he makes it clear that it's his decision, if he does!

Because dogs are not humans. Some dog-owners need reminding of this.

So what do you do about toileting? ‘Old school’ where you just pop newspaper down on your kitchen floor and let them crap everywhere? Can’t imagine many dogs going for 8 or 9 hours without being able to go outside to pee/poo.

I know people with smaller dogs who use cat flaps.