Son 16.5 yrs. and home after drinking alcohol

[preparingforit]

I am a single parent. My 16.5 yr old came home after a couple of drinks last evening at eight. He wasn't drunk but speech slurred a little.
His father will be aggressive and shout at him for ages if I ring to tell him. They have no relationship to speak of as my exh has very little interest in ou children and abandoned them for all intents and purposes.
He wades in every now and again trying to throw his weight around but the kids really dislike him.
My son is crying on the phone today as I was very upset with him.
I have no issue buying him a few cans and dropping/ collecting him for a party .
Am I being totally unreasonable here ?

No it's not. I suggest you read your jurisdictions medical research in the ridiculous increase of 30 and below year olds needing transplants due to alcohol abuse.

It is blatantly obvious due to the cavalier attitude to under age drinking what's fueling it.

Poor lad. We’ve all been a bit too tipsy at 16/17. It’s like a rite of passage surely??

I don't understand the question OP

It is blatantly obvious due to the cavalier attitude to under age drinking what's fueling it.

I can’t imagine many people are getting their 4 year olds pissed

unreasonable for WHAT exactly?

Why would you even consider telling a deadbeat bully? Its weird your thought process even brought that up.

Where is this data coming from?
"The ridiculous surge"? I am looking at 2024 report and there are fairly stable numbers of people on transplant list in the last 10 years. Especially if you correct for the fact that there were only 123 of them in pandemic years (compared to an average of 500 or so annually) so we are seeing a bit of a backlog from that still.

Ah yes wildly drunk toddler are littering the street while we all turn a blind eye.

He came home a little drunk at Christmas at 16. I think you can have a quiet word, but in frankness at 16 I came home completely drunk and had to be escorted by my friends. Honestly he is just finding his feet and limits. A bit of light teasing might be in order, but nothing more.

This behavior is complete normal. Get a grip

I'm confused. Are you annoyed at him or not? Why is he crying?

Couple. Of. Drinks.

You are carrying on like he's binge drinking and clearing the shelves of ale at his local off licence.

Heavens, whatever you think of the drinking don’t involve his shitty dad.

Im not clear what’s bothering you- you say you’re happy for him to have a few cans? Do you think it was a lot more than that?

Get a grip OP and be thankful that's all you have to worry about! YABU.

Oh come on, OP, he's 16! It's not a big deal and most of us have done it! He won't enjoy the hangover, so just be kind to him and then have a little chuckle about it.

Don’t tell his father - why would you even consider this?

Talk to him calmly about safe drinking. To drink v v slowly because otherwise the effects come over you when it is too late to realise you have had enough / too much.

Our job is to support our young people to learn how to look after themselves.

He made a mistake. That’s it.

16.5! What's the significance of the 0.5?!🤣

He sounds like a normal 16 year old to me!

This is such a bizarre thread. Why on earth would you ring your ex (who your kids don't even have a relationship with) to tell him that your 16 year old son had a couple of drinks last night?! If he's abandoned the kids and they hate him then I don't get why you would ring him for ANYTHING, not least your (almost adult) son being a bit tipsy.

Weird.

Also you say "I have no issue buying him a few cans and dropping/ collecting him for a party" but then you're annoyed and he's crying because he's had a "couple of drinks"???

None of this makes any sense.

Why are you upset with him, if as you say, you don't mind buying him a few cans? Also why are you giving their father power and control over children that he abandoned? Why would you allow him to shout and be aggressive towards them, when he has no relationship with them? You sound confused Op, talk about mixed messaging.

And yet obesity is still a bigger problem for the nhs than alcohol, shall we ban macdonalds as well?

I don't know why you would tell his father.

I also don't know why you would buy him cans and drop him at a party then be annoyed that he's drunk?

I think getting too drunk at 17/18 is a right of passage tbh and most people learn from it!

It's the data in UK if people who are assessed for transplant not specifically having transplants.

I was advised by three individual heads of liver national teams across UK/ Irish specialist last year with my late mother.

We were told that the lack of progress to generic liver research was the demand due to younger people diagnosed with alcohol abuse diseases.

Food can be in moderation alcohol for teens can't!

He is 16 with a forming brain 🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️

Again, you are carrying on like he's binge drinking and clearing the shelves of ale at his local off licence.