To be annoyed at being told to be considerate of disabled people

[DefendingPan]

This sign was in the disabled toilet in a restaurant (which is also the only baby change in the restaurant).

What’s the point of this sign? What might parents be doing that they will stop after reading this?

Seriously? 🙄 I think the needs of disabled people are so far behind everyone else, including parents, they’re almost out of sight. It’s just asking you to be considerate - in a world that has collectively stopped giving a fuck, it’s a desperately needed reminder.

Some things are life choices but are treated like they're not ie disability v children. Sometimes they're synonymous but not necessarily.

I dont know why anyone would want to hang around in a toilet/baby change for longer than necessary. I certainly never fed my baby in a toilet or anything like that.

I guess it’s a reminder to not take too long as there will be others waiting, but really which parents spends longer than needed in a public toilet? I’ve taken a while in some occasions when I’ve gone in with my baby and my 4 year old as I need to help the 4 year old and then do a nappy change on baby and a poo nappy can take a while sometimes, especially if they’re resisting the change, I wouldn’t stay in there longer for fun.

If you really wanted the answer you could of asked a member of staff.

As a mum to a young child, I am always quick in and out. Nappy change, outfit back on, wash hands, out in a few minutes.

However I have had to wait ages before whilst parents have taken all 3 of their kids in to the toilet, or are feeding their baby. Really frustrating when there is a shared disabled and baby changing toilet and there is a mum spending 25 mins breast feeding their little one. Not being mean, but do it elsewhere like the rest of us. Baby change should be used for babies / toddlers. I understand single parents might not have people to look after the others but in other cases there’s not need to take your 3 kids in there especially if they are older children and take up 15 mins of time.

If I were you I would encourage them to be conscious of disabled people first by having two separate facilities for disabled access loo and baby change!

People do though, I waited almost 30 mins outside of a baby change and shared disabled toilet the other day and a mum was breast feeding her child.

I wouldn’t read it like this at all.

A lot of people don’t realise that upwards of 80 per cent of disabilities are invisible and sometimes people can need to use the toilet in a hurry so it’s just about being considerate. That is all.

Poor baby!

It’s also the only disabled toilet. The facility is the toilet itself . It is politely asking people not to hog it if they don’t need to.

Considering most people change their baby before arriving at the restaurant, how many people need to change them again anyway in the hour or so they are in the restaurant? Is it one nappy every half hour or something? How do people think we coped in the days baby changing facilities didn’t even exist? We still managed to go out to restaurants without having to do constant nappy changes.

It is to remind you not to stay in there too long. Many disabled people can't use another toilet or hang on and cross their legs while you breast feed or chatter on your phone.

To be perfectly honest - I am disabled - and I am fed up to the back teeth of parents / baby change. I am not blaming the parents per se, but take a look. For example, last weekend I did a long road jouney. Stopped at several service stations. Two "disabled" toilets per station, also doubling as baby change / parent and child (why?) facilities, and don't get me into the number of people just using them because they can (don't get me into the whole invisible disability thing - yes I know that you can't see all disabilities, but sometimes I wonder if 99% of the population has suddenly developed invisible disabilities).

Meanwhile HUGE toilet areas for everyone else, mostly empty and LOADS of room to put in changing spaces etc. Take out two or three cublicles to facilitate these and there will still be loads left. But have two people changing babies and me and every other person with a disability is screwed!

I went to an airport several weeks ago. Apparently everybody and their cousin now has a lanyard for their invisible disability (mostly being too tight to pay for the expedited queue). Then again - maybe 4 disabled toilets which - lo and behold - are now also "changing rooms" to go from your gilet and puffer coat to skimpy T-shirt and shorts.

I don't begrudge spaces for parents at all. In fact I think it's great to see better facilities for travelling parents etc. I get how difficult it is moving around public spaces with young children. But why is it always OUR disabled spaces that must be lost to these?

So honestly, I can imagine why that sign got put up and the sort of entitled people it is aimed at. Problem is, they don't care.

It's often easier to take a little kid in the disabled toilet with you because there's more room, thanks both squeezing into a normal cubicle. I presume that's what the sign means as well.

I've had plenty of times when nappy changes were urgent (leaking or exploding nappies) and I wouldn't have appreciated anyone jumping the queue in those circumstances, nor would I have offered, sorry. Not every disabled person needing to use the toilet is going to need it urgently either. If specifically asked and if my nappy change wasn't urgent then I'd accommodate.

I think it’s a reminder that it is first and foremost a disabled toilet and some people obviously need reminded of that if the establishment have had to put a sign up. Like the spot on the bus is for wheelchair users and people with pushchairs can use it but should be prepared to move for a wheelchair users.

Yes, this. It's a bad setup for everyone.

I’m assuming it’s about the amount of time you take. I was at a service station last summer with family friendly facilities. That were completely separate to the disabled toilets. It was so helpful. My eldest used the toilet while I changed my youngest. Then I was able to go while they were both contained in the room. We all washed our hands before we left the cubicle. Technically a disabled cubicle would allow me to do the same, but it would have been incredibly inconsiderate to someone who has no option but to wait for those facilities. If it was a disabled toilet, by eldest and I would have used a different cubicle as soon as my youngest was changed.

I have one loo in my premises, purpose built by the local authority, which is fully accessible and also the baby change - absolutely nothing we can do about it but apart from having to knock occasionally if it's been occupied for a while, we have no issues. Ideally there'd be separate facilities but in smaller places it can't be helped

My children have been potty trained for many years by now, but even I remember that babies don't shit on a strict schedule and are very inconsiderate with this kind of thing. They don't actually care that you changed them half an hour ago or even 2 minutes ago.

Also, why are you annoyed about being asked to be considerate? It's the only loo I can use when out. It's only asking that parents don't take too long.

It's a vague slightly passive aggressive sign. If they want you to act a specific way they should say so. I would stop going to that place as it seems babies are not very welcome.

You said it’s a disabled toilet and are upset that there is a reminder that it is for the disabled!

It's also annoying that it is aimed at 'mums and dads' specifically. I totally agree with what people are saying upthread about ways to be considerate etc. But sign is badly worded and gives an unwelcoming vibe. There is a better way to say what needs to be said.

Dirty nappies left on floor?