To think this mother should be ashamed of herself

[2boyzNosleep]

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/cly2zq1yl0ko

17yr old girl & 18 yr old boy hook up on holiday in Dubai. I believe they may have met over there. The girls mother finds messages on the girls phone when they return to the UK. The mother reports the guy to Dubai police. He gets arrested as sex with anyone under 18yrs is illegal in Dubai. He has now been sentenced to 1 year in prison.

I haven't looked into it much, as far as I can tell it was consensual, a charity called Detained in Dubai have been trying to help (legally I think).

Am I alone in thinking how bloody spiteful the mother is?!? The girl is 17 years old and I think in another report saw that she turned 18 shortly after returning.

Yes. If it was consensual.

The mother apparently didn’t know what had happened until she came back to the UK but as the crime occurred/is considered a crime in Dubai, she reported it to the relevant authorities in Dubai where the male still was.

The daughter didn't break the law.

Well, he broke that laws of the land. Fair or not, you need to respect the culture and laws of other countries when you are a visitor. Am not sure why some of you think otherwise.

Another takeaway here—stay away from Dubai.

100% this.

No other reason.

The boy’s parents should be ashamed of themselves for holidaying in a brutal regime, where lack of human rights protections exposed the whole family to danger. The maximum sentence for his offence is 10 years. He’s been very fortunate. The indentured labours (aka slaves) who built the love hotels and restaurants the family would have visited…? Their lives aren’t as fortunate.

#Boycott Dubai
Stoneage place should not be supported by other countries visiting. There are hundreds of countries in the world. Visit somewhere else ( I'm not even mentioning it is horrendous on so many levels they are too long to list)
UK people should be lambasting your govt to get the poor sod out of there, but I bet heaps of people will still go visit Dubai, thinking , it will never happen to me. 🙁

You are not comparing like with like. But in the UK the answer is nothing would be likely to happen because of the slender age difference.

He broke a draconian unreasonable law, possibly in ignorance.

But l would think the mother/daughter relationship is broken forever.

The poor lad - they'll have to let him go surely after the negative publicity this is generating for Dubai.
I've always said like others that you couldn't pay me to go there. People seem to think shopping, air con, overwhelming heat and posh marble floors equal "luxury" that make up for the horrendous human rights of the place.
Agree with others it's just tacky as hell - racist, homophobic, misogynist and hypocritical pandering to tourists just to get their money whilst fully opposing our open tolerant values, promoting modern slavery etc.
Never getting a bean from me - just seems a really seedy place all those men dictating what women/gay people/other races etc can do and not do.
No amount of cheap steaks/designer clothes or whatever people like about it is worth that.

I’d suggest that you don’t understand the points being made. There are basically three issues:

A) Should laws apply equally to foreigners, even if may have been are broken by mistake? Most would agree that yes this is sensible.

B) Should leniency be shown in certain cases? Most would agree yes, and more so than is the case here. (despite the fact that, yes, he could have received an even worse sentence)

C) Was it extremely vindictive of a British citizen to report this young man for having sex with someone he is just a few months older than, and which is a perfectly legal and normal occurrence in the country of all of their residence and their citizenship?

Yes, the vast majority would agree it was. So it is this point, C, that OP made and which some (including yourself) seem to be having trouble grasping.

Yes but it wouldn’t have come to the attention of the authorities if it weren’t for the mother reporting it. If it was all consensual then it is very spiteful and malicious of the mother. She knew well what would happen. I know several people living in Dubai and the authorities often do turn a blind eye with such things. They won’t if something is reported in writing like this though.

How do you know she's not black too?

Who is the mother. She's a disgrace. Poor boy.

Why do people go there?

God that is awful. I hope something can be done to get him home soon. Fucking Dubai.

As for the mother's actions, they are abominable. What a cruel act.

A year in prison? I hope he is early released soon

The mother should not have reported it. At 18 you are not going to appreciate the laws there. I hope he can be freed.

The girl involved in this is an Asian girl from a strict family hence the furore from her mother.

Destroying his life out of spite.

I’ve been reading the news and multiple threads on this and agreeing how terrible it is. But I’ve read so many Mumsnet threads now slating the mother saying she did this and did that…. and I am beginning to wonder how does anyone know this is true? unless she or her daughter has done an interview and j have missed it? I guess I am concerned there is more to this story than what people think they know.

The law, as draconian as it is, is not the issue. Wherever you go in the world you have to abide by its laws whether or not you agree with them. That's a given. The issue is the mother reporting him (after finding the morning after pill in her daughter's belongings I believe).

An almost 18 year old girl having consensual sex with someone only months older than her, and he goes to jail because of her mother, that's abhorrent.

Which is statutory rape in various countries.

it would not be where I live, which is (probably) why my sense of justice doesn’t „ping“ / doesn’t flag this young man‘s behaviour as immoral or wrong (at least not simply due to the girl‘s age).

BUT this will not be the same for many other people. Some of these people clearly reside in Dubai 🤷‍♀️

and cases like these do demonstrate why holidaying in Dubai may not be such a great idea…

Dubai DO have some different laws for tourists which makes it confusing. Eg, You can drink alcohol but only in a licensed building, not in public.

A quick Google search laws in Dubai (so reliability is questionable) states that looking through someone else's phone is a criminal offence. I'm guessing the mother/parents of the girl knew/suspected she had sex before leaving Dubai, but reported it once the returned to UK to ensure that they themselves would not face any prosecution.

Those that keep saying that I his fault for not knowing the law- if you think the mothers actions are right, then say if the girl was a victim of honor-based crime from her family, would you be victim blaming the girl- saying she knew what she was doing, it's all her fault, etc? Or still blame him because he knew that they were strict? Likely neither, because its the actions of the family that are shocking.

Is it right to ruin someone's life because you're unhappy about the decision your daughter made? Absolutely not.

Totally agree. I won't go to Dubai for this very reason and I'm a very boring married mother. I would be too worried that I've flashed a shoulder at the wrong person or swore too loud or got a little bit tipsy and land myself in a Dubai prison.

It is utterly appalling and that poor kid has had his life ruined for the spiteful and vengeful act of that woman. And god only knows that awful things are going to happen to him in there.

But the onus was (in the eyes of the law) on him to make sure he adhered to the rules of the country he's in.

I don't know what the answer could have been, maybe his parents getting him clued up beforehand.

Yes, I know the technical detail but the news article is reporting that they are from England. The facts are that in England she wasn't obliged to report this so she isn't respecting or complying with the law of the country she is in as she was back in England when she reported a law that was broken in a different country.

According to reports the Mum and daughter are from England, she was in England when reporting this, this is not the culture or law of England so why is she obliged to do it?