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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Can I bring my partners Syrian mum and sisters to the UK?

235 replies

BA25 · 07/12/2024 19:53

war has broken out, there village is surrounded. Is there any way I can bring them here to keep them safe? My partner is crying non stop. Can I sponsor them? The rules are so confusing.

OP posts:
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gloriagloria · 07/12/2024 23:50

AliasGrace47 · 07/12/2024 23:23

We certainly are struggling to provide enough resources for ourselves... I did say if 'no-one can help them'. Europe & the US need to pressure Egypt & Turkey to take them. The issue is that atm Turkey are turning refugees back to unsanitary & dangerous camps in Syria. Iraq is v unsafe, so is Lebanon bc of the war w Israel. We can't take everyone affected, but if people's lives are in danger, & neighbours refuse to help, I think we & the rest of Europe should accept refugees temporarily & try to find settlement plans w Syria' s neighbours in the meantime. We after all took in many Ukranian refugees indefinitely when the economy was poor, although there is ofc a limit.
Europe, maybe not us, should surely be able to help some people though, esp as birth rates are falling. Many 2015 refugees integrated well & became good citizens.

Edited

Turkey has already taken 3 million Syrian refugees. Lebanon, Jordan an other neighboring countries have taken hundreds of thousand each despite collapsing economies and rapidly falling international support. Threes countries have far less “space” and capacity for newcomers. UK has taken 20,000 so don’t imply neighboring countries are not fulfilling their responsibilities and we should absolve ourselves.

Dmsandfloatydress · 07/12/2024 23:53

Dp needs to send money so they can cross the border into Turkey. It can be arranged. Once they are in Turkey they are safe and both of you can send money for good and accommodation until the situation calms down. Or if anyone qualifies, register then at a British uni for a masters degree, get a student visa for them and they can apply for humanitarian protection once they are here. I know its a route many Iranians have taken when there are no other choices...

AvidOpalBee · 07/12/2024 23:59

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AliasGrace47 · 08/12/2024 00:01

gloriagloria · 07/12/2024 23:50

Turkey has already taken 3 million Syrian refugees. Lebanon, Jordan an other neighboring countries have taken hundreds of thousand each despite collapsing economies and rapidly falling international support. Threes countries have far less “space” and capacity for newcomers. UK has taken 20,000 so don’t imply neighboring countries are not fulfilling their responsibilities and we should absolve ourselves.

Edited

I'm sorry, I didn't realise they had such a huge number. In that case, although we & the rest of Europe are in a hard position, can we not take some, if all else falls through, as a collective? As I said the EU has stated they need migrants.
The first option should be neighbours, Iraq has refugees in thousands rather than millions like the rest....and they are accepting more at the moment.
What about other African countries, apart from Egypt?
I don't think we should absolve ourselves. But the past few years have given many of the UK compassion fatigue, as evidenced bu this thread.
But as pps said, the refugees can help us, too. We need care workers & other service sector jobs, among others. Our population is aging, our birth rate falling.

Mrsbloggz · 08/12/2024 00:03

I'm so sorry that you are in this situation op🙏

AliasGrace47 · 08/12/2024 00:04

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Disgusting post. Imagine if that were your mother & sisters.
This thread is bringing out bottom feeders- I expect bc it's late the mods are lower.

NautilusLionfish · 08/12/2024 00:07

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ha ha ha She is a high earner.. They wont be on benefits. You dont know their religion. And do you understand how hard it is for a foreigner to get any benefits here? Hop on and go try to guard the door then. Otherwise her partners family will be coming. Perhaps I will invite my whole village here!

R053 · 08/12/2024 00:08

Livelovebehappy · 07/12/2024 22:57

I hope not. Not least because it will open the floodgates for others to be accepted. We’re currently in crisis in this country already with huge demands on a collapsing infrastructure. Best for them to find a country nearby which can accommodate them on a temporary basis pending the sorting out of the situation in Syria, which would align more with their culture and language needs. There’s a lot of unrest in the world, and we’re a small island with very little room to accommodate everyone going through this type of situation. Sorry.

The neighbouring countries don’t have room and free infrastructure either and are currently hosting many more times refugees than the UK. My daughter’s boyfriend is from Turkey and he told us that they have 4 million refugees already from Ukraine, Syria, Iran etc. It’s so crowded they have people sleeping on the beach.

He would be annoyed too that UK people say Turkey’s culture aligns with the people from those countries. He does not consider that to be the case with different languages spoken and many Turkish people bring more European in outlook. He believes Turkey is really struggling.

SaltLampFeelsDamp · 08/12/2024 00:09

You never hear anything about China taking refugees, yet they have so much land. They could take 100,000,000,000 and not even notice! Why don’t we insist they take all the world’s refugees in exchange for wanting to flood our markets with their manufacturing?

AliasGrace47 · 08/12/2024 00:09

NautilusLionfish · 08/12/2024 00:07

ha ha ha She is a high earner.. They wont be on benefits. You dont know their religion. And do you understand how hard it is for a foreigner to get any benefits here? Hop on and go try to guard the door then. Otherwise her partners family will be coming. Perhaps I will invite my whole village here!

AvidOpal, why do you think you're a better citizen than refugees by default of being British? You're not really demonstrating the values of tolerance, respect or compassion!

AvidOpalBee · 08/12/2024 00:11

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AliasGrace47 · 08/12/2024 00:11

SaltLampFeelsDamp · 08/12/2024 00:09

You never hear anything about China taking refugees, yet they have so much land. They could take 100,000,000,000 and not even notice! Why don’t we insist they take all the world’s refugees in exchange for wanting to flood our markets with their manufacturing?

They should... the Chinese government is the epitome of 'Greed is good.' the government is v racist, look how they treat the Uighurs. I doubt they'd welcome refugees, esp Muslims.

AvidOpalBee · 08/12/2024 00:13

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Mrsbloggz · 08/12/2024 00:14

SaltLampFeelsDamp · 08/12/2024 00:09

You never hear anything about China taking refugees, yet they have so much land. They could take 100,000,000,000 and not even notice! Why don’t we insist they take all the world’s refugees in exchange for wanting to flood our markets with their manufacturing?

I'm no expert but I don't think 'send me your huddles masses' is quite China's thing? It's not really considered cool by the totalitarian dictator types 🤷🏻‍♀

AvidOpalBee · 08/12/2024 00:14

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sparklychair · 08/12/2024 00:14

OK. I still don't understand what they are all fighting about - I can understand Israel, because the Palestinians got shoved aside to make room for the Jews. And why couldn't have that been done in a gentle, respectful manner, with proper compensation?.. I am sorry for both parties.
But everyone else - what is the point? What do they gain in the Middle East?

greenel · 08/12/2024 00:14

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NautilusLionfish · 08/12/2024 00:17

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TheLemonFatball · 08/12/2024 00:18

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SaltLampFeelsDamp · 08/12/2024 00:19

sparklychair · 08/12/2024 00:14

OK. I still don't understand what they are all fighting about - I can understand Israel, because the Palestinians got shoved aside to make room for the Jews. And why couldn't have that been done in a gentle, respectful manner, with proper compensation?.. I am sorry for both parties.
But everyone else - what is the point? What do they gain in the Middle East?

It’s…. complicated. This image went viral as a joke but it’s also serious.

Can I bring my partners Syrian mum and sisters to the UK?
Swivelhead · 08/12/2024 00:21

Hairyfairy01 · 07/12/2024 21:54

I fully admit i don't fully understand what is going on in Syria but I'm sorry for your partners family and I hope they get to a place of safety. I cannot even begin to imagine what they are going through.

The outgoing US administration is arming/paying Al Qaeda / White Knights / Islamic militanra to try to usurp power in Syria to destabilise the region further ahead of Trump taking power. They know/hope Russia will divert resources from conflict elsewhere to come to the Syrian ruler's aid. They are doing it now because Trump made it clear last term he would not authorise further CIA spending/interference/arming of Islamists in Syria.

sparklychair · 08/12/2024 00:23

@SaltLampFeelsDamp err... thank you. I suspect you are implying I need a degree in Middle Eastern Politics and History?

Maggispice · 08/12/2024 00:23

Surely it's better they work towards escaping to a country with similar culture, climate, food, religion etc.

AliasGrace47 · 08/12/2024 00:24

sparkly, can't you look it up? I don't understand it fully either, but politics is never easy bc people rarely are.. Essentially, as I posted upthread, Assad is a tyrant & a rebel army are trying to replace him. They are not good, have committed war crimes.
As to Israel, they did treat the Palestinians badly in some ways, but they are also a stateless nation who needed a home after the Holocaust.
It's not surprising it was hard to settle. The British wanted to get out, ditto for the other allies. It was so hard to settle, and still is.

This was supposed to be for the OP, before it degenerated into racism & political debating beyond its remit (the latter partly my fault, I am sorry).

Swivelhead · 08/12/2024 00:25

OP I am desperately sorry for your husband. However, having been through the immigration wringer with my own family- it is a complete non starter. Besides which this country is honestly at some kind of tipping point now. It's not somewhere I would bring someone seeking refuge to anymore.

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