It's who you know, not what you know

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Wanted to get peoples thoughts on this.

I was reflecting the other morning on my career path and it saddened me somewhat.

I grew up as an academically gifted working class girl from a single parent household. No dad around whatsoever. I always had the somewhat naive belief that you could be anything you wanted to, if you worked hard and put your mind to it.

Fast forward to my university years, I excelled in a subject that I was very passionate about but I've since learnt is seen as a 'posh persons subject'. Note the very well to do people on my course...
I just didn't understand social hierarchy at that age and always believed I was worthy to be in the room.

I had a PT job all through uni and saved enough so I could do a series of highly coveted (unpaid) internships in London. I've always supported myself financially.

Then it all starts to go a bit tits up.

Great feedback but overlooked for 'friends of a friends' child at every interview opportunity. Applying for advertised roles where they always already had someone in mind, usually an old school friend etc.

It got to a point where the debt from trying was too much and I took a well paid graduate job in a relatively boring industry and left my passion behind. I'm still in that industry years later and I feel a bit sore about the whole thing

I understand that connections are important in all walks of life and at some point, most people benefit from knowing someone and getting a foot in the door. I'm also not deluded to think I would be successful for every interview, but this really was getting ridiculous.

But AIBU to believe that certain opportunities are closed to WC young people, regardless of their abilities and work ethic?

My husband and I are passionate about state schooling for future children but part of me thinks about the opportunities they might get through private education and making 'the right' connections. I guess everyone makes the most of the opportunities they've got.

I think this is a hugely neglected area of career guidance. I’m in Ireland where it’s not so much about class, but there are networks based on other things - GAA connections, politics, schools etc. I was a lot like you op, wide eyed and believing that it was all about hard work and good grades but it only got me so far, Dh, wouldn’t hold a candle to me academically but has always understood how to work the system and his career went from strength to strength.

I also think it not true to say its not as extreme than Ireland - so many people have historically emigrated because they couldn't move into the middle class there - same as other Europeans. Permanent jobs and mortgages were harder to get than in England and they are both factors in creating a secure base to progress from. I think the class system in Ireland is very strong, at times stronger and more rigid than the UK its just not perceived as such and plays out differently - look at the traveller community, for example they are not even recognised as part of the class system, they sit outside it in their own country.

I completely agree! It's a shame but knowing what I know now, I'm in a better position to try and prepare my future children for any disappointment and try to steer them down routes that are a bit more 'achievable'

Yeah I have lived in Ireland too. And the connections thing is very big there too.

There was nepotism in the company I worked in, in Dublin. They hired people's daughters, sons, granddaughters over better qualified people

The GAA is also a very strange thing in Ireland. It's not just a sport , it affects a lot of different aspects of people's lives there. Especially in the smaller villages.

I's very good for the community, but I think it's become a bit like a cult.

As you said. GAA players get the good jobs.

GAA players will hire other GAA players.

It shouldn't be like that.

I saw an Irish comedian do a jokey video online about cults in Ireland and he said that the GAA was the biggest cult there is.

I remember Niall Breslin (irish musician) wrote in his book that he got some big finance job, when he was young and he hadn't a clue what he was doing in the job.

He said he had got the job from his sporting connections.

Yes, I would say that is fair. WC do have connections here too, from school friends, to people their families work for. There's a huge mix of classes here.

I've also managed to network accidentally - bestie works in huge law firm in Central by a bridge 😶 when younger I'd sometimes join department parties and/or Christmas and I'd meet loads of people. My background isn't law of any kind, but sometimes I got offered admin type etc if I ever needed it or got bored or wanted to "work there for a bit".

So there are definitely many ways to network, same at some bars I'd meet all sorts.

In the arts though, almost all networking, I do agree.

Every job I ever got was through a contact. In my mid 40's and have never written a CV. My DP is the same... he's never even been interviewed.
Both media-ish jobs.

Wow! I've never heard that before.

I meant that genuinely.. it sounded sarcastic when I read it back lol

Did you do an MA in History Art and volunteer in museums or galleries while doing your degree?

Maybe, if not, there might be a way now of doing an MA and some volunteering part time. Then you could try again bringing all your other skills to offer, and your dedication and enthusiasm would be very clear.

I believe there is also Art Law , Art PR etc Being a curator must be a long haul and gallery and museum work very poorly paid unless you become a dealer, starting small, yourself.

Soft skills would be essential no doubt.

In the Antiques Road not all of the experts are MC. Also, look at Roy Strong who ran the VA, he was wc but grammar school with the luck of having a wonderful teacher. People may learn or acquire a manner that makes people assume they are MC when that is not how they began.

Museums & heritage! All that unpaid work experience to prove you were passionate about the subject. I ended up living in a tent, in a youth hostel that summer. I'm in a different sector, problematic because you need funding to ride out the gaps between projects till you are established.
I thought things were getting better with paid intern ships but no.
A young 'curator' popped up connected with the Courtald the other day. She stood out because she wasn't very good and she had a distinctive surname. Turns out she's the daughter of a moderately shit science museum curator.
The science museum is the one I have the most beef with - just why is it so rubbish, all those dot.com millionaires to tap up. And yet it just gets worse and worse, under funded, under imaginative. When do you ever hear anything exciting or groundbreaking about it. The whole network needs clearing out.

Was it because you were rich, privately educated, MC, had gone to an esteemed university? Or was it that you had a gregarious, generous, genial natures, and piles of friends and acquaintances with whom you made the effort to keep in touch?

I know two people like this and their characters are absolutely key to their success, on top of their many honed skills and massively dedicated, hard work.

Interestingly Roy Strong is the exception and was ahead and took so much flack for getting decent catering going. I have a huge amount of respect for the V&A they have pushed in new ways in terms of funding, scholarship & marketing.
It's not always the happiest place to work, there are bitchy sections but it's better than most.

I come from a similar background, but I was lucky. I had partners at my firm who appreciated my knowledge and pushed me in the right direction at the right time, so that I was able to build my own network. They didn't coddle me, but they introduced me to the type of people that my peers already had access to through family connections. I think that my path could have been very different without their support, and I know that I've been very lucky.

@GelatinousDynamo but they obviously saw something in you that they knew would work with those people - they trusted you as you inherently had qualities they could identify

Well, yes. But I'm not arrogant enough to think myself some sort of girl wonder, lots of people have these and similar qualities. I was lucky enough to get mentored by men who decided to push me.

Depends on the industry and organisation. I work for a global bank and knowing someone is definitely not how people get their foot in our door (at least in the London office). HR would do their absolute nut; they've developed multiple routes to entry, including a school leavers apprenticeship, and are very proud of their commitment to inclusion.

Sometimes if there's a role opening up in the senior level, the high-ups might contact someone they've worked with before, and see if they're interested. But people are unlikely to recommend acquaintances ahead of talent, because it reflects really badly on them if the hire tanks. So at that level it is "who" you know, but you'd already be well into the 6-figure salaries before even that would be an issue.

Interesting reading your thread. My middle DS is coming up against this now, he's job hunting after finishing a Masters at a "posh" uni, looking for a job that would lead to working with rare books. He would like to be a special collections librarian or work as a cataloguer for an auction house, that kind of thing. We are middle class but not lots of family money middle class and we work in the creative sector so never know when the next pay check is coming. We can't subsidise him long term as our pensions need major input.
We have no relevant contacts, he didn't go to private school so his Latin is beginner level. The amount of further study needed is very high for a not very well paid job and we live in Scotland so miles away from most opportunities. Nice young women from a certain background seem to prediminate. He doesn't meet any recruitment diversity criteria ( well he had an ASD diagnosis but he doesnt like to tell people and I'm sure it's not that rare in the field!). He's going to need a lot of luck and perseverance.
I'm wary of him taking any old job then getting stuck in a different field.

He would need an MA probably for the library work don’t you think? Has he asked any libraries or archives what they would look for?

Cataloguing I am not so sure about but MAs seem to be more and more common.

YANBU.

Slightly different, but my ds15 is a very good and very passionate rugby player. He has been selected for the academy team for our local premiership club, but we are discovering how much the old boy network and which school you go to has an impact on your chance of success.
The boys who go to a very rugby focused public school just have so many more opportunities, and also that innate sense of entitlement that my son doesn't have.

I think some of it is also that people from wealthier families can relocate or be "there" at the right time IYKWIM. They may not know someone but they have the confidence and fina ces to move to whichever city has a job, so their scope is global.

You are not helping him. I just did a search and can find a total of 27 jobs working with rare books in the whole of the UK, some of which require significant experience and some of which are gambling not books at all. Compare that with publishing; well over 1000 roles including loads of starter roles. Then there's retail for books, insurance for books, book binding, loads of other roles.

Think of job hunting like bird hunting. If you set out to find an eagle in Surrey, you'll find it hard going. Look for a pigeon and work your way through. That doesn't mean that anyone who ever spotted an eagle cheated, but that the numbers are riding against the task.

He needs an MLIS - he should be looking in CILIP ( the org for libraries and go from there). Tbh, as a masters grad I would expect him to know this.

I agree 100%

@Staringatthemoon of course we know all that, he has excellent research skills and knows all about CILIP, he's quite positive, it's me that's privately worried we don't quite have enough social and financial capital to help him as much as we'd like, especially compared to many of his peers at uni.
His younger brother is studying fashion design so I'm going to be worrying for a good few years more!
Nobody seems to make sensible career choices in our family, I think it's genetic..