To doze while my kids get themselves ready for school

[Weezypopsy]

Three kids: 12, 15, 17. All capable of making breakfast, getting ready, getting themselves to school etc.

On days I am WFH and my husband goes in, I wake them at their respective times, then doze / sometimes fall asleep again, until I have to get up for work.

when husband is WFH he will get them breakfast and see them off. Neither of us think the other is wrong, just choose to do it differently. He was in the office every day until Covid so think it’s still a nice thing to do for him. I was self employed and did all the morning routines for 13 years so enjoy not having to.

no problem here. Am just curious as have previously seen people little irate at “lazy”parents sleeping in! AIBU to stay snoozing?

Why is your dh getting breakfast for young people of that age!
A bit lazy of you to be in bed though when everyone else is up

I think its fine, my parents worked shifts and would often be fast asleep while I was getting up for school. I personally enjoy the mornings with my son but he's only 7 so needs help in the mornings and me to take him to school.

I get up to harass my not-a-morning-person Y7 child to get ready and then take her to school. Trust me, there is nothing to be treasured about this experience.

When my daughter was Primary I get ready with her and toke her to school. On first day secondary school I go with her. Then one week I was going bus with her but I drop her school alone and pick her up on bus stop. Then I meet her half way cause she need catch 2 buses. When I see she is ok on road etc then I let her going school alone. She is going school alone for 1 month now I do call her before and after school. She always answer phone. I think making kids independent step by step is less stressful for both parents and kids. Now my daughter get up for school, get ready herself I help her if she needs. Tell her bye at door and she go bus alone. But Primary School going school alone is to early for me but I understand some parents works and have no choice

I am not a morning person at all, but I would get up with my kids if I wfh.

It just seems a bit rude not to tbh

Me to especially where so cold 😅

I am WFH today. I stayed in bed whilst DP got up with the DC and got them out the house. Was very nice.

I'm the same. None of us are morning people. Works for us.

Good for you?

Yes good for me and my daughter because do it step by step she was less stres and me too 😊

I drive my 9 year old to school every day. On the days i work from home I wake him up, jump back into bed when he's in the shower and getting himself ready then throw some clothes on to take him to school. I get showered when i get back.

At your kids ages OP, i think what you do is absolutely fine.

So wrong to not get up but also wrong to do anything for them. Okay then … I will get I and just stare at them for a bit.

he likes getting up and makes them some while he’s doing his own, it’s no big deal.

Haha!

Me too, though even then I could have done with an hour or two more!

I would think it lazy and a poor example to your children.

It depends on the kid. My DD was adamant from aged 8 she would walk to school alone. It was only 15 mins and she was fine. She absolutely was not stressed at the thought of doing it on her own.
She is now 14 and will go across the country on her own. She is fiercely independent and hates being mollycoddled.

I think it produces lazy adults with less skills if there parents do everything (that was me!). My mum did absolutely everything. She had been brought up in a household with a very ill mother and absent father. She wanted our childhoods to be perfect so did everything. Was great but we left home completely useless. I definitely don't want my kids to be the same so have taught them to be much more self reliant.

I am in awe that you can do this. We only have our 18 year old youngest still at school and he has to be chiselled out of bed or he would never make it. Let's just say he's not a morning person.

I have 2 alarms.

The first goes off to make sure dc is up. She texts me to confirm she is out of bed. If not, I get up and get her going, but thankfully that is becoming rare. It used to be an issue, hence the system.

the second goes off at the time I actually need to get up.

I can get an extra 90 minutes of sleep. I need that extra 90 minutes. I’m not lazy, I physically need the rest. It’s not my fault my teen gets up well before dawn because she likes to spend a ridiculous amount of time getting ready, nor is it my fault that family life prevents me from going to bed earlier. I’m in my 50s. I need sleep if I want to be an effective employee and parent.

Not at all. Around that age, my daughters started getting their own breakfast. I would be awake and know they were up, but would leave them to it. In fact, they said they preferred to be on their own as didn’t want to communicate in the morning.

At that age I think it's fine. Can't wait to teach my 2 year old how to make her own packed lunch!

I can completely relate to this
It's imbedded into my morning routine to get up, wash and dress myself then head downstairs, knocking on bedroom doors as I go. Always in the kitchen; music on, preparing packed lunches, getting breakfast on the table, have a bit of a chat whilst the youngest (12) potters around, doing her hair then briefly seeing the eldest (15) at the kitchen table, before seeing them off to school, myself leaving 20 mins later.
Soon enough those days will be gone.
Nothing wrong with the odd day off of course!

These cold dark mornings, kids need all the help they can get, and this term is a long slog, so one of us is always on hand

My mum did this and it was lonely not having a parent around in the morning.

I'd get up and drink tea and chat with them.

I care for them so I role model being pro active in the morning. If I laid in bed past 8am they'd be worried I was ill. Get up and show some parenting.
At 18 they'll be gone
You have years of alone time ahead